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Today has been a lazy last day while here. We went to Times Square and picked up some souveniors and that's about all we did. My back was just killer today, probably because i really pushed myself on some stretches yesterday. Def. going to be setting up an appointment with the chiropractor soon. I'd like to go to Freight Fest at Six Flags with the pseudo family in October but there is no way I can with the way my back is now.

 

Someone posted a picture of a baby on Facebook and my uterus started screaming at me. *sigh* Time uterus, in all due time. Although my screaming uterus reminds me I need to make an appointment with the OBGYN just to make sure everything is okay down there.

 

We check out at 11 tomorrow morning and fly out at 3. Mom is picking us up from the airport and we are both ready to be home. It's nice to get out of Georgia for a little while but we both miss our furbabies!

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We did! L swears up and down my back didn't ruin our trip, although he obviously wished my back wasn't hurting for my sake. The flight back home was smooth, first time either of us had willingly flown on an Airbus. And we didn't die! Small miracles. Although I prefer Airbus seat belts, they keep big people in mind vs. Delta who tried to cut my circulation off. We were both so excited to get home. The kids came running the second we walked in the door and Jasper hasn't left my side since.

 

I've spent all day today catching up with Statistics (I had an assignment due by midnight tonight). I have one in English due as well but it won't take but a few minutes. I do have my first essay due next Monday. *groan* I'm also starting to get itchy and hivey again sat here. Luckily I spoke with my doctor earlier today and they are bringing me back up to 40 MG of prednisone for 3 days and working down by 20 MG again just to give me some daily relief. Right now I have a killer tension headache (mostly due to the few hives on my neck, grrr) but all the prednisone I have has to be taken tomorrow morning.

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Today was a busy first day back at work. I come back from vacation to a brand new computer - woohoo!! - and updated Microsoft Suite (no more 2003!!!). However I also came back to my desk turned at an angle and everything moved around. And since the administrator moved it I can't move it back. It was setting my OCD off so bad but by the end of the day it had grown on me, although I still don't like it 100%.

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I know that pain. They like moved my tower unit from the floor and put it on the desk on its side (???) and moved my monitor from the middle of my desk to the left side and angled it. It was said it was to do it to 'minimize the cords seen' but I think it's worse because now my mouse and keyboard wires have to reach OVER my desk for me to use them.

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I didn't do too hot on yet another stupid reading test for Macroeconomics. Seriously, 25 minutes for 25 questions? Some of those questions I can easily spend 5 minutes rereading before it clicks for me. I also didn't do too hot on a statistics test - I didn't miss much but because there were only 10 questions what I did miss made it so much worse.

 

Feeling bummed and if I were asked at this moment did I want to continue with school I'd say no. I just want a hug from my husband but he's knocked out to the world... going to lay down and bury my face into my big love bug's fur.

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I'm feeling better today about the whole school thing - I just needed a good night's sleep to put it behind me.

 

Work was insanely hectic today. I've worked two days since coming home from vacation and I'm already needing another vacation! The person who does the scheduling wasn't in today (no idea why, decided not to??) so I got saddled with that. And of course there wasn't 100% coverage through the weekend so I had to deal with that and it gave me the biggest headache. There's a reason I call it the bad mojo book. I really hate when it's on my desk. On top of that I'm still catching up the invoices from when I was on vacation - as soon as I finished the one huge folder I got another one on my desk. That's not including all the other tasks I'm given.... so glad it's the weekend.

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I ended up leaving work early - just something about that pork chop from lunch didn't set right on my stomach. Should have just stuck with a salad. Ugh.

 

I made an appointment for Friday with a chiropractor and one with an OBGYN for next Wednesday (since my normal doctor doesn't really 'do the female thing'... despite being female. Meh). I'm just ready to have my back and neck looked at.

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And so this is how it ends.

 

I never thought I'd be writing these words but, my marriage is over. Shocked, right? So am I. It's not by my decision that it's over. L came home yesterday and promptly laid out the beginnings of a sentence almost all of us on ENA have heard at one point of another. And my heart dropped. My stomach knotted almost instantly. I find it more than a little ironic that I am back now on this site as a broken hearted person considering this is were we met.

 

The long and the short of it is, he fell out of love with me. The romance died, views changed for him as he got older, he wants to travel and not be held down... I knew none of this before yesterday. He also doesn't want to try to save our marriage. In his words, 'There isn't anything left in me to try for'. To say I was shocked is an understatement.

 

The living situation is... I don't know. My head is still swimming from my marriage ending to even form a coherant thought about that. I ask that anyone who is friends with us on facebook post nothing. I took today off from work (for obvious reasons) and we are waiting a while to break the news - or for someone to just guess it - at work. So I ask that you post nothing as I'm friends with a lot of people I work with.

 

I'm not okay right now. I know I will be but right now, in this moment, I'm not.

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