Lady Rashomon Posted July 12, 2010 Share Posted July 12, 2010 I haven't posted here in a while, but was just thinking about the progress that's been made since I joined this forum. Things with my husband have been shaky but they've been BETTER than they have been in a long time. We're still not going to counseling--lots of avoidance issues there. But it feels like our bond has deepened and strengthened throughout all the troubles. He's been here for me in a way that nobody in my life ever has. We've vacationed together, moved into a new place, are creating new goals for the life we would like to have. I can't say things are 100% perfect. The passion is still pretty nonexistent, and I definitely have bouts of loneliness and doubt, but I'm beginning to wonder if this is just a matter of me growing up and learning to accept things as they are rather than as I wish they would be. We laugh together, we have a great friendship, and there's a solidity here that I can't imagine finding anywhere else. So my mantra of late is: Things may not be perfect, but if you focus on the good stuff, you'll see just how much you really have. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doityourself Posted July 12, 2010 Share Posted July 12, 2010 Thats great, I also have my days like that. Where is just okay, but most days I say he is my other half, we have eachothers back and I can tell him anything. Have you guys tried something from your past? Something that you look back on and remember as a good time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Rashomon Posted July 12, 2010 Author Share Posted July 12, 2010 The interesting thing is that I don't necessarily think things were better in the past qualitatively speaking. We actually have a much better relationship overall than we ever had in the past. But I think that when I was younger, I was actually satisfied with a lot less. Now I'm learning to alter my expectations and be realistic about what can and can't be fulfilled in a relationship. It's just one day at a time from here... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doityourself Posted July 12, 2010 Share Posted July 12, 2010 I also have made those improvements recently, I always was me, me, me, and now Im learning to give to. That some things are just unrealistic to ask for or expect. Like laughter and happiness 24/7, sometimes things do go wrong and are stressful, its how we work on it together is what makes the differance for us. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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