Do women know a that a guy can't ask out a girl when she's the customer and he's on the clock?

[lisbon]

Omg I'm in the same situation.

I like a guy but I'm his stores customer..

 

 

I had no idea this wasn't allowed

[Pall Wall]

I don't know if this one question seems important enough. But if I do get the chance to talk with her more, wiether it's in the moment of trying to ask her out, or having a conversation with her on the phone. Should I never make mention to her about the stupid "can't ask out customers" rule?

 

Based on what I mentioned in my previous post, if I asked her out, and she said "yes" and then after she leaves the store I get so overwhelmed, that I actually literally faint and hit the floor, but wake up 2 minutes later. And I feel like that may or may not happen, lol. That other day when I escorted her around the store, after she left NOBODY was around to see this but Jenn who was standing near by. But I literally fell to my knees resting my hands and face on the counter with my eyes closed thinking outloud, "Aww Jenn I so badly wanna ask that girl out

you have no idea." And Jenn was in all "Awws" leaning down giving me a big hug saying, "Aww Paulie your so cute that's why I love you so much." If Shelly and I connect and progress, should I or should I not mention to her these effects she's had on me, making me faint to her?

[abitbroken]

I would somehow try to get her outside of the store. Sometime, mention where you will be at a particular time. I can't think of a scenario at the moment, unfortunately. somehow tell her where you usually go after work or on a particular day of the week and just see if she bites. If she is interested in you, she may just show up there. Don't sweat it if she doesn't as she might be busy or lose her nerve. But stay regular in going there and if she shows, ask her out for real. OR she may just say 'i'd love to come. for example:

 

"i just got my film review magazine. I can't wait to tear into it. I might sit up at McSlurpy's shake shop tomorrow (saturday) morning (or when I get off at 7 tonight) and read the whole thing." Or "i just watched Marley and Me" last night. Makes me want to hug my dog. I;m going to take him for a walk through the park tonight just to show him I love him. Sappy, i know!"

[abitbroken]

I don't know if this one question seems important enough. But if I do get the chance to talk with her more, wiether it's in the moment of trying to ask her out, or having a conversation with her on the phone. Should I never make mention to her about the stupid "can't ask out customers" rule?

 

 

No. Because you CAN ask customers out, just not in the store/ on the clock. I have used "i can't date/ask customers out" as a way to let someone down gently before, so unless you add a "but" in there, it will feel like a rejection.

 

Only mention it if you say something like "They just updated the employee handbook. We aren't allowed to ask customers out, but I found out that customers can ask US out. Isn't that an interesting rule?" And quickly change the subject. Ask your coworker what she thinks about it if she is a trusted friend.

 

But i would try to somehow get her out of the store, and when you do, explain the policy and that you have been hoping to see her outside the store or bump into her so you can ask her out.

[Solo Pilot]

Ok Paulie lol. Your choices are very simple. Your already know what they are. This girl obviously makes you feel alive when you see her and there is nothing better than being around her. For the sake of argument lets say this she could be the one. Of course you don't know that, but isn't it worth it to take the risk of asking her out at work. I'm sure you won't get fired. Did you say you'd only get fired if she filed a sexual harassment or would asking her out get your fired period. I know jobs are hard to find but damn if I was getting good vibes from Shelby and she was obviously digging me, I would risk asking her out in a heartbeat.

 

I rather deal with finding another job then deal with letting a good girl go. Good girls are a lot more rare than jobs are(Even in this economy)

[Pall Wall]

It's been over two weeks since I've seen her last time in the store. She has come into the store a couple of times to return her movies and check out more, but I missed out on her on those days when I wasn't working.

 

I officially get a little bummed when I think about it that I've missed out on seeing her. Because you know what? All it takes is three seconds . Those very first three seconds when I first see that shining joyous presence that is her enter the doorway of my workplace, and from that 3 second moment on...my day is complete, remarkable, and nothing can ever bother me.

 

In the name off all that is Holy my heart just sings, "I want to see her kind optimistic smile again, I want to get to know her, even if it means I become just a friend, I want her to be in my life."

 

Most times people play scenarios in their heads about what they would like to see happen with someone they are interested in. Sure I've done that many times in the past playing a visual of having that first kiss with them. But not with the Shelly girl. I'm personally choosing not to form that kind of visual so soon, I fear it jinxes things. But there are however two scenarios that come to mind:

 

1. Cuddiling with her on a couch watching movies.

2. Inviting her to be my wedding date to my best friend Erik's Wedding next summer, where I'm a Groomsman.

 

I feel there is only one thing I must do, and that's going for it: asking her next time I see her. But not ask her out on a date necessarley. I would just liked to tell her how cool and comfortable she is to talk to, and that I would love to talk with her more just cause it's not easy to catch her while I'm at work.

 

I am however afraid the opportunity to catch her won't come soon enough. I'm afraid too much time will pass, my feeling will fade, the vibe will fade, and someone else will have asked her out before me by then.

[abitbroken]

I would not ask her on a date that is occurring next year. So much can happen in between then. Also, if a guy I didn't really know well asked me to go somewhere next year, I would think it would be weird. Also, cuddling on the sofa is NOT a first date. Nothing that requires physical contact beyond taking a ladies hand to help her out of the car that is parked over a weird curb, etc... The invite should be out to a movie at a theater rather than at home. Check to see if your town has outdoor movies in the park. If you chicken out you can talk about it and ask her if she's going and then say that you are going and hope to see her - so therefore you aren't really asking her out directly. Also - it gives people a chance to chat more than a regular movie would. But if you want to just "go for it" - going to get an ice cream or going to a movie, etc, should be more like it. Many people say movies are not a good first date, but under the circumstances that you met because of movies, it might be. I would prefer somewhere where you could talk first - like the ice cream parlor or pizza place or a walk in the park.

[Pall Wall]

Oh gosh I totally mislead you about that, I didn't mean ask her now to be my wedding date for next year. I meant if we started dating from this time on as the months progressed and THEN invite her as my wedding date.

[abitbroken]

Oh gosh I totally mislead you about that, I didn't mean ask her now to be my wedding date for next year. I meant if we started dating from this time on as the months progressed and THEN invite her as my wedding date.

 

Don't think that far in advanced. Don't have a "plan" on what to do with her like that . Take it ONE step at a time. It just made me think if you are already thinking about asking her to a far off wedding that you are in danger of idealizing her before you even know her - it seems like such a romantic idea to want to take someone to a wedding. Just get past the next convo with her, get past asking her out on a date and let what happens next dictate the future...

[Cognitive_Canine]

Don't think that far in advanced. Don't have a "plan" on what to do with her like that . Take it ONE step at a time. It just made me think if you are already thinking about asking her to a far off wedding that you are in danger of idealizing her before you even know her - it seems like such a romantic idea to want to take someone to a wedding. Just get past the next convo with her, get past asking her out on a date and let what happens next dictate the future...

 

I agree. Don't think so far ahead in the future. Focus on the now and just the first date. Then when you finish the first date, worry about the second.

 

You will overwhelm yourself if you think too far into the future. And, this girl will end up as more like fantasy than real. You'll lose perspective.

[PussInBoots]

I seriously would not even have thought about sexual harassment my bf asked for my # while he was working luckily for him I was interested before hand. But I could see were you would be nervous who knows with all the mixed signals women can send.

 

Heres a idea what about next time she comes in you ask for your break? then hang outside and strike up a convo with her then? I think your good to go cause if she didn't mention a bf when you hinted then their most likely isent one.

 

You have to decide on a course of action soon tho I can tell you from my personal experience my bf took a good while to reciprocate and I thought he wasn't interested so I had almost written it off completely and moved on.

[Pall Wall]

Okay, then I need a little feedback of my own little role play here. If I do get to see her again soon, I make a little fun small talk with her, which at times can be up to a minute or two. Before she leaves how does my saying this in my confident smiling demeanor to her:

 

"You know I've wanted to say, your a very fun movie-goer to talk with every time I see you, but when I'm not working it's hard to catch you (lol). Do you think we can talk some more later on?" (by that I mean calling each other on the phone and talking.)

 

I need you all to grade me, would that work well?

[Jetta]

I didn't know this either. Could be part of the reason bartender and I never hooked up. No advice, except come up with a way to get her phone number.

[PussInBoots]

Okay, then I need a little feedback of my own little role play here. If I do get to see her again soon, I make a little fun small talk with her, which at times can be up to a minute or two. Before she leaves how does my saying this in my confident smiling demeanor to her:

 

"You know I've wanted to say, your a very fun movie-goer to talk with every time I see you, but when I'm not working it's hard to catch you (lol). Do you think we can talk some more later on?" (by that I mean calling each other on the phone and talking.)

 

I need you all to grade me, would that work well?

 

Dude your way over thinking this here ya go try this one... "hey I think your cute would you like to get together some time heres my cell # if you want" short sweet and gets the point accross the way you described sounds like it came out of a cheesy how to pick up women manuel be cool be yourself...