peanutbutterandjelly Posted June 17, 2010 Author Share Posted June 17, 2010 you know what I dont understand about this situation? He gave me his full name cause he wanted to add me on facebook. He gave me his outside email address and his screen name so we could chat. We had a really good conversation and he told me he would definitely email me. I dont understand why you go through all that trouble and interact with someone off the site if you're really not interested or just trying to be nice. i wouldnt give out that information unless I was really interested in actually meeting up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms Darcy Posted June 17, 2010 Share Posted June 17, 2010 im not cut out for dating. im really not. and it sucks because I have no other choice. I still feel like if I could just go on one date, I would start to feel better about the whole thing, but I have been meeting lots of guys online and in real life and it never leads to a date or anything. I have to admit that I feel worse about myself now than I did when I actively started dating again. I'm really not sure how change my attitude about it. I try not to care, but I still end up feeling hurt when no one will even give me a chance and take me on a date. Why not take a break from dating and focus on you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peanutbutterandjelly Posted June 17, 2010 Author Share Posted June 17, 2010 cause ive spent the past 8 months focusing on me and I feel ready to meet someone. I've only been really actively trying to date for around a month or so and havnt even gone on a real one yet. I dont think I should give up yet, but it's starting to get frustrating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peanutbutterandjelly Posted June 18, 2010 Author Share Posted June 18, 2010 he just emailed me! he was like, "i figured i should check in since we havn't talked in a few days". I guess that means he's still interested in hanging out? Maybe he's young and doesnt really know dating etiquette? Or maybe he's just looking for a friend? I'm really not sure... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clarity Posted June 18, 2010 Share Posted June 18, 2010 An 18-year old acting less maturely than you'd like? Shocking! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peanutbutterandjelly Posted June 19, 2010 Author Share Posted June 19, 2010 well, i definitely didnt know about all these dating "rules" and all that until my most recent ex broke up with me at 24 years old. I didnt know I was supposed to wait for the guy to contact me and not chase and all that goodstuff when I was younger, so maybe he doesnt know "dating etiquette" either. Plus he's a self proclaimed feminist, haha. I dont think he believes in all that stuff. or yeah, maybe he's just immature. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clarity Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 Well, to me, "not knowing" is part of immaturity. As you experience and learn more, you mature. I'm not saying he's "immature". That would imply he's not mature for his age. What I meant to say is that when two people, one 18 and another 24, get together, there's more than likely a maturity mismatch there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Capricorn3 Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 Well, to me, "not knowing" is part of immaturity. As you experience and learn more, you mature. I'm not saying he's "immature". That would imply he's not mature for his age. What I meant to say is that when two people, one 18 and another 24, get together, there's more than likely a maturity mismatch there. I agree. I wouldn't say he's being immature, but rather, he's simply acting his age - bearing in mind he was 17 not so long ago, still a kid really if you think about it. So yes, I would definitely agree with those who say that 25 and 18 are at completely different stages in life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peanutbutterandjelly Posted June 19, 2010 Author Share Posted June 19, 2010 yes, definitely. he is just acting his age. I was never an 18 year old guy though, so i have no idea what could be going through his head. He said he is not online much and rarely uses a cell phone, so maybe that's why it took him a while to write me back. We talked about meeting up, but I dont want to push it and scare him away. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peanutbutterandjelly Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 well he emailed me back and asked me for my number Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vuvuzela Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 I'm a young-ish guy and I'd love to date an older woman. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Puckdog27 Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 I personally don't think he's that much younger than you really...it's all in the attitude, age is just a number... Until you go for drinks......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mmmd Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 i've dated a girl a year older than me, 5 years older than me, and now 2 years older than me. makes no real difference i don't think. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shudder Posted June 22, 2010 Share Posted June 22, 2010 well he emailed me back and asked me for my number did you give it him? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peanutbutterandjelly Posted June 23, 2010 Author Share Posted June 23, 2010 Until you go for drinks......... i dont drink so that's actually not an issue lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peanutbutterandjelly Posted June 23, 2010 Author Share Posted June 23, 2010 did you give it him? yup, i gave it to him and he texted me a bunch yesterday. I sent him a text today because he sent the last one yesterday but didnt hear back from him. I'm not a huge texter, he says he isn't either... he said he loses his phone a lot.. i wonder if he will ever dial my number and talk to me or if he will just keep texting me. I'm not big on talking or texting, but im kinda interested to see if he calls. He said he wanted to hang out with me soon, but hasn't made any official plans, so i guess i should just wait and see... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peanutbutterandjelly Posted June 25, 2010 Author Share Posted June 25, 2010 this guy is so confusing to me! we texted a bunch like 5 days ago, I texted him once the next and he didnt respond... and then i didnt hear from him until about 20 minutes ago. He was like, "i havnt heard from you in a while" and told me when he was free to meet up. I think he is young and maybe doesnt either understand pursuing a woman or doesnt believe in it... I'm not sure. Anyways, he asked me for my number the other day, then he told me when he was free today, so i think things are on the right track... a little slower than I am used to, but maybe that's not a bad thing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shudder Posted June 25, 2010 Share Posted June 25, 2010 eh don't look into it too much. i talked to this one girl from online and she wanted to text. when i mentioned i wanted to call her she freaked out and thought i was too pushy. like hello.. alexander graham bell didn't invent the telephone so we could write messages to each other Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peanutbutterandjelly Posted June 25, 2010 Author Share Posted June 25, 2010 yeah, he actually emailed me tonight, didnt text... i think he is indirectly asking me out lol, but I'm not sure. Should I just tell him when I'm free and see if he tries to set something up? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peanutbutterandjelly Posted June 25, 2010 Author Share Posted June 25, 2010 he basically said, "i'm free... this day, this day and this day, but not this day"... and that's it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shudder Posted June 25, 2010 Share Posted June 25, 2010 i'd just take it as him not knowing what he's doing lol.. these days young people seem to text more.. which kinda annoys me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peanutbutterandjelly Posted June 25, 2010 Author Share Posted June 25, 2010 i dont think im gonna think of it as going on a date... im just gonna think of it as hanging out with a potential new friend. Id rather make a cool new friend with the same interests than try to lead it towards something more and become disapointed/frustrated that we're just not at the same stages in life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shudder Posted June 25, 2010 Share Posted June 25, 2010 yea thats good. the problem with all this online dating thing is a lot of people seem to want an instant connection.. best to not look at it that way Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peanutbutterandjelly Posted June 25, 2010 Author Share Posted June 25, 2010 yeah, exactly! it seems like a lot of people on these sites start talking to you with the idea that you are going to start a relationship with them right off the bat. it's kiinda scary. theres no friends first. when you start talkign with someone or eventually meeting them, its like you both know that the other is judging you based on if they think they could marry you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
testcase Posted June 25, 2010 Share Posted June 25, 2010 I always go into a date thinking of it as hanging out with a friend. If there is a spark there awesome! If not well I got someone to have some drinks with and have fun with. Either way is fine with me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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