shy2cool Posted June 12, 2010 Share Posted June 12, 2010 I want to read about your stories/journey from being shy to being confident and having belief in yourself. Boring people are not attractive! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meteorstrike Posted June 12, 2010 Share Posted June 12, 2010 I used to stay home all day. Now I only stay home almost all day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iBroken Posted June 12, 2010 Share Posted June 12, 2010 I used to be shy. I was only comfortable with my friends. I was also uncomfortable as I was struggling with my sexuality. Then you get to a point (generally speaking) where you just stop caring what people think about you. I got there and my confidence went through the roof. I can talk to anyone when I am in my zone. Right now, my ego is a bit battered, so I am a bit fearful of rejection right now. But I am just getting out of a break up. Once I get past this bump, Ill be back on my game. You just have to have more confidence in yourself and less confidence in what others may or may not think of you. Remember, while you live in this world, its easiest to feel like the world revolves around you. Other people are simply players in your game of life and are out to get you and criticize you. But the reality is, these people we see on the street, our friends, our co-workers. They have their own lives to live, they have their own problems. And if they look at you and are quick to judge, then they arent worth a friendship or a bat of an eye Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hurting85 Posted June 12, 2010 Share Posted June 12, 2010 I think my changed came through work. I used to be the stereotypical wall flower. Now I find myself having conversations with all sorts of people! I decided a few weeks back that I could no longer classify myself as shy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shy2cool Posted June 13, 2010 Author Share Posted June 13, 2010 Thanks guys. I just find that at times I have nothing to talk about. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ellandroader Posted June 13, 2010 Share Posted June 13, 2010 I know how it goes to feel that way. To an extent, I still do. Things changed for me when I got some help for my inner issues and talked to somebody, then it was the case of taking the plunge and indulging in new things to build my confidence. It took time but eventually, I got more comfortable and confident, and slowly improved. I am not really an exciting talker so I spoke more when spoken to, but I focused on having a good time and doing the best I could. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
easyguy Posted June 13, 2010 Share Posted June 13, 2010 *Raises hand* I've definitely changed for the better. Too many factors have contributed to the change, but I can narrow it down to these: -Work -Traveling alone -The break up with my first girlfriend -Spending quality time in bars playing music, socializing, making friends -Surrounding myself with positive friends Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
surfNski Posted June 13, 2010 Share Posted June 13, 2010 I used to be very shy when I was young. I remember being to afraid to go up to the counter and ask for more kethchup at McD's. But I hated it, I felt like I was stuck in a prison. It has been a life long struggle of putting myself in uncomfortable positions, forcing myelf to be outgoing. Sometimes it works and sometimes I end up not connecting with people and feeling awkward. Still life has gotten a thousand times better, most people would say that I am really outgoing and thats how I try to portray myself. I still struggle, especially with making friends and conversating with attractive women but my life is amazing compared to what it would have been if I didnt push myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WomanWriter Posted June 15, 2010 Share Posted June 15, 2010 I'm still a little shy, but I force myself to try new things---church, sports, academic classes, fundraisers, volunteering, etc. While I'm there, I don't put pressure on myself to be interesting. I just talk to people if they seem to have something in common or if they come to me. It has gotten easier by putting myself out there. I also say hi to people walking down the street, smile at the bus driver, and generally just try to be friendly. I've stopped "forcing" myself to be interesting because I find that people think I am trying too hard. Now I just talk when I'm moved to talk. We have things to talk about because of the activities we are involved with. We just share observations, opinions, feelings, jokes...that kinda thing. There are a lot of elderly people in my church. They helped me loosen up with their humor. If I'm feeling shy around people my own age, I go see my elderly friends and they always have something to say (they appreciate good listeners). The trick is not to force it. Just be around. Try new activities. You don't have to make deep conversation with everyone. Just smile and say hi. Talk more in depth with the people you feel more of a connection with or whoever makes you feel comfortable. Practice being a listener and you will have people coming to you to chat, then you will be able to talk back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted June 15, 2010 Share Posted June 15, 2010 I was shy andvery insecure until I was about 14-15. What changed for me was getting involved in community activism, learning how to dance (just "freestyle") and meeting my high school sweetheart who was (is?) an exuberant, sociable type and a great dancer! I also joined a youth group and forced myself to go to the many social events. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flint_Wood Posted June 16, 2010 Share Posted June 16, 2010 I'm not quite to the point where I can go up to and just start talking to anyone, but I can talk to most strangers almost like they're old friends if the situation calls for it. I used to be barely able to form a sentence, even around people I was comfortable with. I'm still a little quiet, but I'm never afraid to make my point or tell a joke or a story when I think it's appropriate. I think I mostly got this point because I've faced enough rejection and know that I'll get over whatever hardships come my way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LawlessOne Posted June 17, 2010 Share Posted June 17, 2010 I'm still kind of the same, I guess in the long run that's a good thing. I'm not neccessarily shy but I usually don't talk to people unless I have to or someone engages with me first. I've always been a bit boring, but I'm working on that. Just don't ask me to go dancing, go to some sleazy club or go out bar-hopping or I'll pull my trademark, "Well, we'll see." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jaykiddo Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 I spent six years smoking and sitting at home, drinking, and watching endless amounts of television. I broke up with my ex and decided to start living life. I may be in some debt for the first time in my life but at least im living it. I can now go swimming in my apartment complex; something I used to have anxiety attacks about. I can now go out to the park for a walk with my dog and am no longer paranoid about it. I guess the company you keep does change who you are because after breaking up with my indoors all the time ex I have finally seen the sun and met the beauty of people and life beyond a four walled room. I realized life is too short to scared. One day you could loose everything and looking back did you ever really use it too its full potential, did you ever really value and cherish the times you had with them because really in life all we have is our memories, and our happiness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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