okane24 Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 I have been dating my girlfriend for about 6 months now, and I'm totally sprung over her. Head over heels... The big problem is, she leaves to go back to Korea, her home country in 2 months. We are both currently in San Diego. She is a foreign exchange student and I live in SD. Its been going really well lately, minus the few bickering fights, but I love this girl! She mentioned possibly coming back to the states for a Masters Degree, so I have some hope. I want to know if theres any possibility we can make this work. In July, she turns 24 and I'm already 33. We're going to Hawaii, and I want to ask her to marry me. I know shes not ready for that, and I don't even know if I am. I just know I don't wanna lose her. Shes the Best girlfriend I've had so far. Shes beautiful, smart, strong willed, caring and on and on... I don't know if I can relocate to Korea though for her. I love the states too much. Just looking for some opinions on what to do and how to think about this situation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gath Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 You need to ask her if she wants to live in the US and persue the relationship. If she doesn't respond in the affirmative, then I'm afraid you're going to have to let her go. She may just not view this relationship as having a future. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mattj Posted May 18, 2010 Share Posted May 18, 2010 No way! My girlfriend moved back to korea about a year ago, we've been in a LDR since then! We still haven't figured out which country to live together in though- still a toss up between britain, france and korea (i'm from britain- i want to live in france, but she finds life there too slow... in the meantime she's getting me to study korean in case she gets a decent job before i graduate) Have you any thoughts about visiting her in korea? If you're actually considering marriage then perhaps you should meet her folks first Anyway, bottom line, we've been making it work between korea and europe, so i see no real problem for you if you want it to happen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sidehop Posted May 18, 2010 Share Posted May 18, 2010 Considering her situation, would you guys be able to work out a LDR until one of you can move permanently? Is she doing to stay in Korea after finishing her Master's? Have you been to Korea (I'm assuming South?) and perhaps if it's possible for you to take a trip to see what it's like? I know many people that relocated overseas due to jobs, etc and ended up living there for many years and loved it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mattj Posted May 18, 2010 Share Posted May 18, 2010 Have you been to Korea (I'm assuming South?) and perhaps if it's possible for you to take a trip to see what it's like? I know many people that relocated overseas due to jobs, etc and ended up living there for many years and loved it. It's pretty easy to move there for an english speaker- there's a huge number of language schools, all demanding english teachers- something anyone can do as long as they have any degree and have done a short course in teaching english as a foreign language. As for life there it's actually quite nice, but perhaps a bit fast paced for someone from the country like me, especially in seoul Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
okane24 Posted May 18, 2010 Author Share Posted May 18, 2010 Hey thanks everyone for the feedback. She plans on getting a job in Korea after her studies. Her Masters is a consideration and not solid yet. Since she is leaving in two months and counting, the pressure is getting to me. Every bit of time I don't see her or can't spend with her, I feel down and upset. I have so many things going on in my life with my career and friends and I sort of put them off because I always want to spend time with my girl. And yes, I have thought about visiting Korea to see what its like. She tells me I'm totally welcome to visit her in Seoul. And my friend actually teaches English out there. I have a pretty dynamic International tourism business where there is a possibility that travelling to Asia, including Korea could help me business out, so its definitely in the cards to go out there. Right now, though, I want to see how invested in this relationship she is. I am totally head over heels for her. For her, though, I'm afraid that she wants to treat me, like another "experience" she had while in America. She wants to box me up as a good memory of her time here and move on when she gets home, to her "real" life. Its frustrating when You love someone more than they love you. Thats how I feel at least. For example, she just flaked on me to go to the gym today. We had plans to see eachother tomorrow also, so she just figured it would be okay to push me off and do everything tomorrow. Her excuse was she had to help her friend with some homework for school today. I would NEVER cancel on her. Especially now, since shes leaving so soon. All the time we spend together is precious to me... Sorry, just venting. I was crying this morning because I was listening to a Korean love song and I began to miss her. She hasn't even gone home yet, but I miss her already... Arrrghhh, this all just Sucks!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mattj Posted May 19, 2010 Share Posted May 19, 2010 I can sympathise I guess- my girlfriend can seem a bit uninterested sometimes, and it does no doubt put a strain on a long distance relationship. For example- she complained that I called her expecting to talk too often- so i stopped calling her every day, only for her to complain that i didn't call her enough any more... Nonetheless, she claims to love me more that i do her on a constant basis, so that helps to assure that particular worry a bit- even if i don't entireley believe it myself. Exactly how serious is your relationship? I mean, is she a little upset to be going? I remember when I had to go to a different country to my girlfriend we were both in tears- I now have some serious bad feelings about train stations. Anyway, your situation seems simmilar to mine in some ways, so keep me informed about what happens! our girlfriends seem to be a similar age too... maybe being older you can avoid being paraded around seoul in front of all of her friends like some kind of conversation piece- you have been warned. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thlocke Posted May 19, 2010 Share Posted May 19, 2010 Strange, my girlfriend is in Korea too... She is teaching english right now and we have been long distance closing in on 6 months. I visited her a couple months ago (I'm from the United States). I will see her again in July. I think you could easily find a job out there if you wish, english teachers are in demand. Some words of advice....beware of the time difference, can be tough. I'm at a 13 hour difference so when she gets off work and home at 8pm, it's 7am here. I quickly had to become a morning person...it's tough but Skype is a savior. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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