What can be done with used engagement rings?

[Citlali]

I did not imply that - you inferred and that is a different thing.

 

I would very much like to know how many "many" is and what evidence you have for that statement. I see very little. I see a lot of men wearing wedding rings but I don't know of any man that wears an engagement ring.

 

Certainly wikipedia (even if not infallible) does not seem to think so: link removed

 

Although you cannot discern the difference between the two comments you made, there is one. That you didn't mean to imply it doesn't mean your comment as written didn't at all or logically allow for such inferences (whch are perfectly fine as long as they logically follow). What you actually said, not what you meant to say or thought you were saying, is what counts.

 

Again, though, I am not debating about what is the predominant tradition or expectation. I agree with what you said about that. I said so myself. I simply disagreed that just because that was the tradition and expectation, that it logically followed that no women give men engagement rings.

 

I myself have given one, my best friend, three of my high school friends, my mother's friend, a professor in undergrad, a professor in law school, and two of my neighbors. Is that a small sample, sure. I am not arguing it is a huge trend. I simply said that to show that women do indeed give men engagement rings despite the overwhelming tradition and expectation to the opposite.

 

I don't think I can say more than that which I already have said several times, though.

 

Also, FarthesEdge, I am a girl. Hence the "Jenn".

[FarthestEdge]

...Also, FarthesEdge, I am a girl. Hence the "Jenn".

 

I think you misread my post. When I said 'he' I was referring to DN. Unless I missed something, in which case I apologize for any typo. I knew you were female. I was addressing you, but then talking about DN.

[Citlali]

My bad. I totally skimmed through and thought you were somehow addressing me, which confused me because of the content of it and the "he".

 

In response to what you did say, though, again it doesn't matter what he meant or thought he was saying, it's what he said and what he said logically leads to the inference I made. If you want to say few women give men engagement rings because the tradition and expectation is the opposite then say "few women given men engagement rings because the tradition and expectation is the opposite" not "why don't women give men engagement rings?" There is a clear difference. I didn't overreach in my inference because it immediately and logically followed from what he actually wrote. He just didn't write what he meant to the first time. The second time it was clear. I don't know him, so I didn't give him the benefit of the doubt.

 

As for what the tradition actually is, I already know that. I have said so a few times now.

 

In the end what matters is that we all now know what the other meant and we agree about what the tradition and expectation is.

[DN]

Although you cannot discern the difference between the two comments you made, there is one. That you didn't mean to imply it doesn't mean your comment as written didn't at all or logically allow for such inferences (whch are perfectly fine as long as they logically follow). What you actually said, not what you meant to say or thought you were saying, is what counts.

 

Again, though, I am not debating about what is the predominant tradition or expectation. I agree with what you said about that. I said so myself. I simply disagreed that just because that was the tradition and expectation, that it logically followed that no women give men engagement rings.

The fact that a few people in a group may act outside the norm doesn't mean that one has to hedge every statement about the group with qualifying statements to the effect that there may be exceptions - it should be safe to assume that reasonable and sensible people will take that for granted. Even if some women do buy engagement rings it is not enough for the cultural norm to be affected significantly and only means that the few exceptions prove the rule.

 

And the intent of my post remains the same - if it became the norm that women also bought engagement rings (or gifts) of similar value then I would wager that the expectations and debates about how much should be spent would be very different.

[HouseKitten]

I've always wondered what the hell guys do with an engagement ring once they get married? Mens rings tend to be thicker and wider than womens, and I've never seen a man wearing two bands on the same finger.

 

Saying that, my friend Jenny got her husband an engagement ring before they got married and apparently he just doesn't wear it now they're married. Which seems unusual to me - why spend that money on something you'll only wear for maybe a year or less?

[3boys]

I work for a small, family-owned jewelry store so I can honestly tell you that he will not get anything close to what he paid for the original diamond if he tries to resell it to a store. Most chains will not let you "trade-in" one diamond for another....smaller, private stores usually will as long as you are upgrading. I can tell you the markup on diamonds is HUGE and any store will not give you more than what they could reasonably buy it for from a wholesaler.

 

Also, on a side note, princess cut diamonds may look pretty, but they have their downfalls. For one, they show smaller than rounds (a 1 ct princess will look considerably smaller than a 1 ct. round)....the settings also have a higher tendency to loosen up in the heads.....they also chip easier (and YES, you CAN chip a diamond), especially on the corners. Quite often, when someone brings in a princess cut diamond because it's "loose," what has happened is that the corner under the prongs has chipped away or the prong has caught in something and pulled away (which prongs on a princess have a higher tendency to do).

[sasha1982]

Thanks so much for your helpful input 3boys!

I have been told that before about princess cut.. When I was engaged in the past I had a yellow gold 1 ct round solitare and I must say it sparkled gorgeously and I got tons of compliments on it... After we broke up awhile later I noticed some rings on women that were princess cut and I really loved them and started to think I preferred them over round cut. I also wear silver and white gold the most and would prefer a ring in white gold and princess cut seems to look gorgeous with white gold! I'm ok with losing a bit of quality with a princess, as it's the look I really love. I also don't think my ring would be THAT big that I'd have to worry about banging it around that much. I'm pretty gentle with my jewellery.

 

My bf did in the past go to a small jewellery wholesaler... When he asked about my old ring he commented that my ex would have paid almost double for "less" ring that he could have gotten if he went to a jewellery wholesaler. He has a guy friend that recently got engaged and got his fiancee a ring that would cost $8000 in a chain store for $4000. I saw the ring on her, it was STUNNING! And big !!

I'm positive my boyfriend would go to a smaller jewellery wholesaler as well.

 

I'm really not all that picky.. my bf knows the style I like.. white gold, princess cut and maybe a bit of small diamonds on the band. I don't care what he spends, I just hope it's NOT the same diamond from her ring

I do know her diamond was a single solitare princess cut of 0.76 ct. So I pray I don't end up with that exact size or I'm going to be worried

If/when he proposes, the appraisal says 0.70, 0.85, 1.00 or .50 I will be happy as long as it doesn't say 0.76 !!!! LOL