BackToYou Posted May 7, 2010 Share Posted May 7, 2010 I have a crush on this nice girl from same university. She has been looking at me and I have been looking at her but I am bit too shy to make a move in here. So because exams are over soon I will not have chance to talk with her anytime soon. So I came to a conclusion to send her private message on facebook ( we are not friends but I know her name) and ask her out. Is this good idea? Or should I refrain to do that? Do I look like a stalker? I know if she declines it would lead to akward situations when I bumb to her but maybe I should try? Advices are welcome! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sidehop Posted May 7, 2010 Share Posted May 7, 2010 Would you be comfortable saying hi and perhaps ask her about the school (exam, specific subjects etc) to break the ice? I'd probably go that route before 'finding' her on FB and contacting her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brightest Dark Posted May 7, 2010 Share Posted May 7, 2010 Is she in the same class as you? How exactly do you know her at Uni? I mean, if you just see her but she doesn't study in your class, and you don't know any of her friends or anything that could be a bit weird. But also how many times have you seen her and she seen you? If you know she has seen you a lot then I don't think it's that much of a big deal finding her on facebook. You could say you were looking to see who from Uni was on there or something. Have you found her page already? I always have people I don't know well finding me on there and I think they just stumbled accross my page. But it may depend what you have in common and if there are any others you may both know who are common friends. Or are there any groups on their for your Uni or town or something like that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GeneralLee Posted May 7, 2010 Share Posted May 7, 2010 Facebook and social networking sites in general aren't the best idea for asking out someone you don't already know. You two have no existing basis for communication so it will come accross as though you don't have the confidence to ask her in person. Next time the two of you cross paths just casually recognize her and say some thing to the effect of "Hey, (her name) right? From (insert the class you have together)? Those exams are killer, how are you doing on yours?" Don't come off as romantically interested or nervous when you talk to her, just imagine you were talking to a guy from your class. Then casually invite her somewhere neutral, like lunch or coffee, (i.e. "I'm studying so much I'm getting no sleep, I'm on my way to grab some coffee, wanna come?" or "You eaten yet? I'm going to get some lunch right now.") Just a spur of the moment invitation to come with you to do something you were already going to do. That way it doesn't seem like you want to take her on a date, you're just trying to get some coffee or get some lunch and wouldn't be opposed to some company. I know in your head you think if you ask her and she says no, shes just going to blow you out of the water then go tell everybody what a loser you are for trying and everyone around you is going to be coming up to you going "You tried to ask out (her name)!? WHAT A MORON HAHAHA!" but it isn't like that. As long as you approach the situation with a confident frame of mind, not creepy or romantically, the worst she can do is decline or tell you shes busy, and all you've done is politely invite her along with you to grab food or coffee or whatever it is you decide to invite her to do. Good luck my man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hikapo Posted May 7, 2010 Share Posted May 7, 2010 NOOOO...no facebook messages. Go say hi and ask her out, direct or indirect. Women don't like it when you send them pansy messages on the internet. They need a real man that asks them out face to face. If you message her on facebook she gonna think you are a stalker. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happyfrank Posted May 7, 2010 Share Posted May 7, 2010 Go straight up to her, look her in the eyes. Say Hi, Her name. How are you? Just wanted to tell you that I want to get to know you and if it's cool I call you sometime. Since she looks at you too. I would say 80% chance, your getting her number. Well if she says no.. She wasn't really feeling you and you can move on.. Best of luck to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BackToYou Posted May 7, 2010 Author Share Posted May 7, 2010 Thanks for the advices You guys are right so I`ll pass on that fb idea completely. I try to break the ice next time I see her and try to talk to her and maybe ask her out. We have only one life so sometimes you must take a risk if you really want something, I guess We don`t know each other at all (we are not in the same class etc.) but she has been looking at me for a good while, a few months maybe. Even my friends have noticed that. She seems to be a really nice girl and I would like to know her better. I am just so freaking bad at starting the conversation with someone I do not know. I have missed my chances many times in my life in situations like this before just because of my shyness. I guess it`s time make some changes and beat my shyness Let`s see how it goes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sidehop Posted May 8, 2010 Share Posted May 8, 2010 Good luck! Keep us updated if you wish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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