Ascending Posted April 10, 2010 Share Posted April 10, 2010 I hope her boyfriend leaves her I hope that she doesn't succeed in school I hope that she has a hard time finding a job I hope her beauty will fade I hope she'll realize what she's lost I hope she comes back to me then, not because I'll have the perfect chance to really hurt her back, but because she's all I really want. Pretty pathetic thoughts, huh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amandathepanda Posted April 10, 2010 Share Posted April 10, 2010 No, natural thoughts when we have been hurt... And whats good is you are telling us, and not her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hexaemeron Posted April 10, 2010 Share Posted April 10, 2010 The only thing ugly thoughts will do is turn your own soul ugly. You don't have to wish her well, but wishing those things upon her only means you'll be the one to get ugly on the inside. That's not so good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms Darcy Posted April 10, 2010 Share Posted April 10, 2010 I hope her boyfriend leaves her I hope that she doesn't succeed in school I hope that she has a hard time finding a job I hope her beauty will fade I hope she'll realize what she's lost I hope she comes back to me then, not because I'll have the perfect chance to really hurt her back, but because she's all I really want. Pretty pathetic thoughts, huh? I doubt you would want her back if she was broke, ugly, unemployed, rejected and begging for you back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted April 10, 2010 Share Posted April 10, 2010 The only thing ugly thoughts will do is turn your own soul ugly. You don't have to wish her well, but wishing those things upon her only means you'll be the one to get ugly on the inside. That's not so good. ^ I agree. I understand that you're hurting right now, but you will never be happy as long as you wish ill on others. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sophie274 Posted April 10, 2010 Share Posted April 10, 2010 I agree with hex about the ugly thoughts ... however, I do think we get a little moratorium on having to be mother Teresa after a painful episode. Ugly thoughts, and slowly letting go of them, are part of the healing process after a break-up, and I think it's GOOD to go through an angry and resentful stage. It's a defense mechanism that helps us pick ourselves back up, instead of just feeling sorry for ourselves. So ok, you have these thoughts. I'm sure you know deep down in your heart that that's not really what you want to happen, just that right now you're hurt and you want her to FEEL your hurt and realize what she's done. Focus on letting her go, and those thoughts will recede too, til you get to a blissful place of indifference/mild wishing them well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kahdeksan Posted April 10, 2010 Share Posted April 10, 2010 The anger phase only works if you come out from it. Provided that you not let the hatred consume you. Otherwise the hatred will poison your soul and everything around you, even your friends and family, which could leave to dire consequences. Ultimately though, at the cost and detriment to your own mental health and lifestyle, not hers. Be the better man, and seek to accept things as they are, when indeed you are ready, filter out the hatred. Do not burden yourself with so much hatred. It's a load far heavier than you'd otherwise think you're capable of handling by brushing it off on her in its entirety. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
illbot1985 Posted April 10, 2010 Share Posted April 10, 2010 I hope her boyfriend leaves her I hope that she doesn't succeed in school I hope that she has a hard time finding a job I hope her beauty will fade I hope she'll realize what she's lost I hope she comes back to me then, not because I'll have the perfect chance to really hurt her back, but because she's all I really want. Pretty pathetic thoughts, huh? sometimes I feel the same way towards my ex. But then I think about it and I tell myself that I cannot wish harm for someone I loved and still care for. Then my only hope comes to this: I hope she will realize what she has lost, comes back to me but I will not accept her because at that point in my life I will be happier with someone else.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blackey Posted April 10, 2010 Share Posted April 10, 2010 how long has it been since you guys are over? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uncomfynumb Posted April 11, 2010 Share Posted April 11, 2010 Reminds me of a country song that is popular these days. Here are the lyrics: "I havent been to church since I don’t remember when Things were goin’ great ‘til they fell apart again So I listened to the preacher as he told me what to do He said you can’t go hatin’ others who have done wrong to you Sometimes we get angry, but we must not condemn Let the good Lord do His job and you just pray for them I pray your brakes go out runnin’ down a hill I pray a flowerpot falls from a window sill and knocks you in the head like I’d like to I pray your birthday comes and nobody calls I pray you’re flyin’ high when your engine stalls I pray all your dreams never come true Just know wherever you are honey, I pray for you I’m really glad I found my way to church ‘Cause I’m already feelin’ better and I thank God for the words Yeah I’m goin’to take the high road And do what the preacher told me to do You keep messin’ up and I’ll keep prayin’ for you I pray your tire blows out at 110 I pray you pass out drunk with your best friend and wake up with his and her tattoos I pray your brakes go out runnin’ down a hill I pray a flowerpot falls from a window sill and knocks you in the head like I’d like to I pray your birthday comes and nobody calls I pray you’re flyin’ high when your engine stalls I pray all your dreams never come true Just know wherever you are, near or far, in your house or in your car, wherever you are honey, I pray for you." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ascending Posted April 12, 2010 Author Share Posted April 12, 2010 how long has it been since you guys are over? Over a year... Ever since, it feels like my life has fallen apart bit by bit. I thought I was getting better, then I thought I was doing great, and now I feel like I'm back at square one. Maybe it's from the stress from exams, or maybe it was from seeing pictures of her with somebody else. She's so gorgeous though, like a model. I just want to know what's on her mind sometimes, like does she miss me? Does she still think of me? Does she still care for me, or hate me? Has she ever regretted it? Even though she's already found someone new. I just wish I could get a reaction out of her or something, or see if I ever made any impact on her life, cause right now, it feels like I never existed in her mind, that we never once were. And after seeing pictures of her new boyfriend, I gotta say, he looks a lot like me, or reminds me of myself. Sometimes I wonder if she sees it too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms Darcy Posted April 12, 2010 Share Posted April 12, 2010 Over a year... Does she still care for me, or hate me? Has she ever regretted it? Even though she's already found someone new. I just wish I could get a reaction out of her or something, or see if I ever made any impact on her life, cause right now, it feels like I never existed in her mind, that we never once were. And after seeing pictures of her new boyfriend, I gotta say, he looks a lot like me, or reminds me of myself. Sometimes I wonder if she sees it too. Dude, it's been a year. It's time to let it go. It's past time to let it go. After a year, I barely remembered my ex (who I dated for about a year). A year is a long time and it's enough time to move on. I think you are still fixating on her because your life isn't where you want it to be. Who cares if she regrets breaking up? Clearly, overall, it is what she wants because she didn't come back. Also "already found someone new" is an interesting statement. One year, or even 3 months, before finding someone else isn't 'already'. It shows that you are stuck in the past and way too keen on thinking about her. And so what if her beau looks like you? She probably has a type. Don't focus on her; focus on your life and making things happen for you. Don't look at her pictures anymore. It's time for you to take responsibility for your life and move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seabreeze Posted April 12, 2010 Share Posted April 12, 2010 Holding on to those feelings will only make it worse. Remember the best revenge is to live well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ascending Posted April 12, 2010 Author Share Posted April 12, 2010 Holding on to those feelings will only make it worse. Remember the best revenge is to live well. I'm trying my best. In the meantime, I'm trying to be an actor (most likely not though), or find work as a stuntman (I'm more interested in this). I'm in school for economics right now, but if I do well and all goes well, I'll get into law. I plan on buying a really nice sports car soon (used, so it's actually not that expensive) and eventually getting a nice big house, before 25 hopefully. A lot of people will tell me I have so much potential, and I didn't realize this potential when I was dating her too, it kind of awoken in me (the physical capabilities at least for doing stunts, and my mind grew sharper), but I don't foresee myself fulfilling all that I can, or hope to achieve. I'd trade it all for one more chance. I don't know how to live well, or be better than her. She's richer than me, has more friends, but she doesn't have an education, at least not that I know of, but she's still very rich so it's like she doesn't even need the education. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms Darcy Posted April 12, 2010 Share Posted April 12, 2010 I don't know how to live well, or be better than her. She's richer than me, has more friends, but she doesn't have an education, at least not that I know of, but she's still very rich so it's like she doesn't even need the education. You don't need to do better than her. I think you need a good talking to by a close friend. This comparison with her is not getting you any happiness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ascending Posted April 12, 2010 Author Share Posted April 12, 2010 You don't need to do better than her. I think you need a good talking to by a close friend. This comparison with her is not getting you any happiness. I've tried discussing it with a few guys. No, this wouldn't work out, I'd really rather not, it wouldn't help me at all. There was only one guy I could speak to about it, he lives really far away though, so we talk about our problems whenever he's in town, he's the only one who could relate and understand my pain. The last guy I spoke to about it was talking smack about me behind my back to my ex whenever I told him something. It's like he sabotaged all of my chances at getting back with my ex and twisted my words and feelings. I specifically told him not to as well, cause I really was hoping for a second chance. I don't talk to him anymore, he can't be trusted, always gossiping - that friendship is gone. I hate to generalize or sound potentially sexist, but girls have it easier when talking to their friends about it, the emotional support is really there. This is all I've got. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms Darcy Posted April 12, 2010 Share Posted April 12, 2010 I've tried discussing it with a few guys. No, this wouldn't work out, I'd really rather not, it wouldn't help me at all. There was only one guy I could speak to about it, he lives really far away though, so we talk about our problems whenever he's in town, he's the only one who could relate and understand my pain. I hate to generalize or sound potentially sexist, but girls have it easier when talking to their friends about it, the emotional support is really there. This is all I've got. I understand what you are saying. All I am saying is that the season with her has passed. You have to move forward. Life is moving forward without you whether you move with it or not. Why not be happy? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yonanz Posted April 12, 2010 Share Posted April 12, 2010 ascending, i know how hurt u feel. but u got to readjust your mindset. firstly, why compare or even care about whether shes doing better than you? what she is doing in her life is, quite honestly speaking, none of your business anymore. whose life are u living now? Yours! not hers! her life is no longer irrelevant. ur life is what should be ur focus now. and so wht if she has a new bf, richer or happier or whatever? thats what u see on the surface. and also, why compare to her? u should make more friends and set little goals along the way. so what if u aint as rich? if u achieve ur little goals, bit by bit, becomign a stuntman, doing well in your economics, geting into law, then ur doing well in your own right. who cares about her? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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