wlh22 Posted April 6, 2010 Share Posted April 6, 2010 Hello folks, So, I am very new to online dating and recently joined a website. And when I was searching for girls there, I came accross a girl that I really liked and I think I have seen her before at a place I go for volunteering. So, my question is, if I am going to ask her out through the website, how should I proceed? Should I do some days of chat first? or Should I directly write to her asking for a coffee (and maybe mention that I have mostly seen her before at the volunteer organization sometime). Otherwise, in general, what do girls prefer? A guy chatting online for a few days before asking out or directly asking to meet over a coffee (or something else)? Help is much appreciated Thanks ENA Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fLuiD Posted April 6, 2010 Share Posted April 6, 2010 Well a little chatting up will help in setting up a date. Coming flat out and asking her from the get-go will put a bit of pressure on her and she would more than likely say no. Spark her interest in you by talking to her for a few days. If you come off as charming enough, she will be more welcoming of a date. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MinziGirl Posted April 6, 2010 Share Posted April 6, 2010 Yes.. a little chatting might have set a date but i would prefer to be able to talk to him for a little while on the phone before setting up a date. If you both are beginning to like one another, it is a good idea to set up a real life date before the feelings gets too intensive. Take your time to get to know each other & don't rush into a real life relationship if you are not comfortable. Sometimes, people are different real life & behind the screen. Good luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wlh22 Posted April 6, 2010 Author Share Posted April 6, 2010 Thank you folks... By the way, this girl lives in the same city. That's I was initially thinking of directly asking her to meet over a coffee in a public place. Also, I don't know her personally but I am sure I have seen her ( and mostly so has she ) a couple of times at the school where I volunteer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Billy Ray Posted April 6, 2010 Share Posted April 6, 2010 Chat a while online then, then ask to talk to her on the phone. After things go good after a while ask her out for a nice informal lunch somewhere. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wlh22 Posted April 8, 2010 Author Share Posted April 8, 2010 so, I did... I sent her a small email today (also mentioned that I think I have seen her before). I hope she responds Wish me the best guys and gals Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MinziGirl Posted April 9, 2010 Share Posted April 9, 2010 Good luck... and best wishes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wlh22 Posted April 10, 2010 Author Share Posted April 10, 2010 well.... she hasn't responded... she came online and I am assuming read my message... but didnt' respond... its been 3 days... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mmmd Posted April 12, 2010 Share Posted April 12, 2010 you got the wrong mindset 1.) these girls get tons of messages. 2.) most don't reply. 3.) you don't know anything about these girls, so don't fall in love. don't take it personally and message a ton of people. if they respond, great, if they don't, that's the way it is. on one website i wasn't getting any replies. i switched to another and have been getting way more replies from much better looking/intelligent girls. still, even then, i'm only batting about 25%, at best, in terms of replies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wlh22 Posted April 13, 2010 Author Share Posted April 13, 2010 aaaaaaaaaah... I didn't know that. I thought people reply. Ok. I will do that. Thanks mmmd. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MinziGirl Posted April 13, 2010 Share Posted April 13, 2010 ... and meanwhile, keep writing to other ladies... As long as you are not attached yet, you can write to other girls. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wlh22 Posted April 15, 2010 Author Share Posted April 15, 2010 Yup... not attached.... so I guess I should write to many girls... This is my first time and I didn't think that so many people DON'T AT ALL respond... weird Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MinziGirl Posted April 15, 2010 Share Posted April 15, 2010 Yup... not attached.... so I guess I should write to many girls... This is my first time and I didn't think that so many people DON'T AT ALL respond... weird IN my opinion, online dating involves a very different set of rules. It is a place where people jumps from one person to the next in a very very fast pace. Sometimes, i call online dating = Microwave dating i.e: Fast to cook and fast to cool. Keep writing to other ladies. I hope that you will find your dream girl soon. Good luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wlh22 Posted April 17, 2010 Author Share Posted April 17, 2010 He he.. nice analogy.. So, this girl I sent the message to didn't respond. ANd tomorrow I will be going for my volunteering project. There is a possibility I may bump into her there. We volunteer at the same school but never work together. So, there is a possibility we may not come accross as well. So, if I see her (we have never met/talked before), how should I behave/react? Any suggestion? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MinziGirl Posted April 17, 2010 Share Posted April 17, 2010 Say hi... & see what happens from there Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wlh22 Posted April 20, 2010 Author Share Posted April 20, 2010 I got an impression that the girl saw me and ignored. (She hasn't even replied to my message). So, letting it go... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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