sidehop Posted January 21, 2011 Share Posted January 21, 2011 It must be so overwhelming & frustrating for you MG. I do hope he gets the right treatment and gets better soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BellaDonna Posted January 21, 2011 Share Posted January 21, 2011 I'm so sorry to hear this, MG. I haven't told my family, I don't want to cry in front of them. I feel so much more at ease spilling my guts here to you guys. We're all here for you. I do think you should tell your family too though- because if they know you are going through a tough time they might think twice before they stress you out more with fighting at home. You should tell them about the stress you are going through and that their fighting is only adding to it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sweetpea03 Posted January 21, 2011 Share Posted January 21, 2011 I'm so sorry to hear this mg. He has a lot of the classic signs of congestive heart failure(water retention, enlarged heart)... I'd be very careful to monitor his intake of sodium. No salt. I hope things can get better for you. Hang in there! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted January 21, 2011 Author Share Posted January 21, 2011 Thank you everyone for your support, it truly means a lot. The nurse called him today, with an appointment for the cardiologist in late Feb. He didn't even know what a cardiologist does, I had to tell him. He wasn't so accepting of the recent findings. I think he was okay finding out that his kidneys are severly diseased but to have possible heart problems is not something he is accepting. He keeps saying, there is nothing wrong with his heart and I keep reminding him that his heart is enlarged for a reason. I get that he is probably scared, as am I. I spent a little time researching congestive heart failure last night and I feel a bit more optomistic right now. There are meds that he can take to strenghten his heart and I read that the doctor will likely have him on a specialized exercise program which is perfect because that will make him take action I think. It feels like deja vu. My father had congestive heart failure and COPD. I remember all the medicine I had to give my dad, pill after pill after pill. Now here I am, on top of the bf's meds as well. We will fight this together, I am in it for the long haul whatever it takes. @Sweetpea, he has actually been a low sodium diet for sometime now because of his elevated blood pressure. I actually just bought a book on low sodium cooking that has a lot of yummy looking recipes. I'm trying to keep him from getting bored with the same old stuff that I have been making. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted January 22, 2011 Author Share Posted January 22, 2011 I'm relieved that he is at home resting. The doctor did not want him working and ordered him to take a week off. He needs to be off his feet for a few days to give his legs a chance to rid themselves of all the water. He can't wear shoes, they don't fit. Not even his pants are comfortable, the pant legs were tight around his legs. I was looking at information from his previous doctor visits and we had been doing really well with weight loss. He went from 224 to 200 lbs over the course of a few months. He even bought new smaller clothes and ordered the smaller work uniforms. When he went to the doctor yesterday he weighed in at 227 lbs most of it, likely from the fluid retention. I made him dinner, Swai fish with steamed cabbage and italian squash. The veggies had a splash of red wine vinegar and Mrs Dash seasoning. He enjoyed his dinner so much that he requested the same thing again tomorrow for lunch. I don't care how tired I am, I would prefer to cook his food and know what he is eating than for him to go out to eat and risk eating way too much sodium. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Firecracker Posted January 22, 2011 Share Posted January 22, 2011 That must make him feel special, when you cook those healthful meals. I know you are doing your 100% best to help. Hope your kids will settle down soon. It's never just one thing, always a combination of things to drive us batty. It's always at least 2 or 3 things with us. He may get this under control if he gets good medical attention right away. Please let me know how he does, Tiffany. Lots of hugs to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sherryberrypie Posted January 22, 2011 Share Posted January 22, 2011 MG, I'm sorry to hear that things have gotten worse for him, healthwise. Perhaps this may be the wakeup call he needs to work to get healthy, and not just with your help. Make sure to tell your kids so they will calm down and keep the house as stress-free as possible for you right now. Take care of MG too. I found an article and this little excerpt explains why he has kidney problems as well: The weakened heart muscles may not be able to supply enough blood to the kidneys, which then begin to lose their normal ability to excrete salt (sodium) and water. This diminished kidney function can cause the body to retain more fluid. link removed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted January 22, 2011 Author Share Posted January 22, 2011 MG, I'm sorry to hear that things have gotten worse for him, healthwise. Perhaps this may be the wakeup call he needs to work to get healthy, and not just with your help. Make sure to tell your kids so they will calm down and keep the house as stress-free as possible for you right now. Take care of MG too. I found an article and this little excerpt explains why he has kidney problems as well: The weakened heart muscles may not be able to supply enough blood to the kidneys, which then begin to lose their normal ability to excrete salt (sodium) and water. This diminished kidney function can cause the body to retain more fluid. link removed Yeah, I was reading several articles on that as well. I figured it was gonna happen eventually. His kidneys are badly diseased and it was only a matter of time before his heart grew tired. Were doing good in a sense that we at least have the diabetes under control (without insulin). When he had his first AC1 test it was 9.6 and most recently it is down to 5.9. The doctor said that is great improvement. I was looking at his blood test results, his kidney function has declined any further which is good. In November his kidney function was at 19% and now he is at 23%, so he has some improvement there. The uncontrolled blood pressure is proving to be harder to handle. He was on a really good blood pressure medicine that had a water pill mixed in and it was working pretty good for him but it made him cough constantly. (one of the side effects). So the doctor changed him to a different blood pressure medicine, which also acted as a protectant for the kidneys but it caused his potassiums levels to go to high and he had to come off that medicine. I suspect they are going to switch some of his meds around again, as his pressure still isn't in the safe zone. They also just increased his Lasix to 40mg to see if that will help relieve him of all the water. I'm reading The Complete Idiot's guide to low sodium meals. Hopefully I can find some good recipes in there and surprise him with some new dishes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted January 23, 2011 Share Posted January 23, 2011 I'm sorry to hear he is going down in some areas. I hope everything turns around for him MG! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted January 23, 2011 Author Share Posted January 23, 2011 I went out to dinner last night with my two best friends. I really just wanted a break from everything, even if only for a few hours. The idea was to do dinner and movie. Dinner was nice, I even had a margarita which was shocking to both of them because normally I don't drink. We went next door to Barnes and Noble to grab some coffee before the movie and found they were having a huge clearance sale so we missed the movie because we were book shopping. I bought some books for my grandbabies, buying them stuff always makes me feel better, no matter how screwed up things in my life are. My happiness didn't last long as my family made sure to text me with their nonsense about their ever growing war between the two of them. I know my daughter is making it worse but she doesn't care, she is so set in her evil ways. She is the reason and I more stressed than I need to be. Something needs to change and soon before I completely come unglued. There is only so much I can handle at the moment. The boyfriend wanted me to stay over last night with him but I was in such an aggravated mood from my daughter killing my night out with the girls that I just wanted to go home and sleep. I don't feel it's healthy for him to be around me when I am in that kind of mood. Ok, it's time for me to shower and get ready for my swing shift. Grrrr I hate that shift. I guess the only good thing about it is it will be dead quiet at work and this will give me time to read. I bought a book last night, Mother Theresa no greater love. I wonder if it will give me the pick me up I so badly need. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted January 23, 2011 Author Share Posted January 23, 2011 I am really not feeling this place today. It doesn't help that I started my cycle today and I feel out of sorts. I guess that would partially explain why I have been feeling more emotional lately but then I have a lot on my plate so I suppose I would just be a weeping willow anyway. I think I am coming to the conclusion that my daughter needs to be out on her own with the kids. As much as I hate for that to happen, I think it's time. She is the source of a lot of my stress at the house and her toxicity is really wearing me down. It's sad when people have to resort to being evil with their own family. The boyfriend decided to venture out today and go watch the football game at his friends house. I think he felt a bit akward today, he wanted to wear his shoes but they don't fit him because of his swollen feet. I said " they are your friends, they will understand why you are wearing your slippers". I'm not seeing any difference in his feet. They are still huge but the legs actually look a little slimmer, they don't feel as tight around the calf area. His face and belly also look less swollen so I am hoping that means the medicine is working. The doctor increased his Lasix from 20 to 40mg. I thought I would have seen quicker improvement but I am probably just impatient, I don't know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sherryberrypie Posted January 24, 2011 Share Posted January 24, 2011 I'm sorry that your night out was spoiled! That's so selfish of them to text you with their complaints and drama. Is it two siblings who are fighting, or?? It's good that you're putting yourself ahead sometimes too. Your daughter has children of her own, she should be out on her own, like any grownup would be. It sounds like she's overstayed her welcome. Maybe your bf could wear crocs until the swelling goes down? Has the doctor recommended those special tensor socks at all? Glad that things with him are slowly improving. Gotta let the body get back to normal slowly or it would be a shock to the system, I would think. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted January 24, 2011 Share Posted January 24, 2011 Sometimes you just gotta give them tough love MG. My mom does it to me and at the time I'm mad at her but eventually I realize she did what was best for me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted January 24, 2011 Author Share Posted January 24, 2011 He wears diabetic socks, the ones that don't bind so that helps a little but his legs still get the indentations from the socks. Yeah my daughter and my youngest son seem to have this war going on right now. My daughter doesn't like his girlfriend and makes it very clear every chance she gets. She is such a spiteful person, no wonder not a lot of people don't like her. It really is sad, I didn't raise her like that. I can't say she overstayed her welcome per se, I wanted her there so I could make sure the babies were okay. After everything I went through a few years ago with the custody thing, I wouldn't have been comfortable with them being away from me. She just needs to stop and realize that all she is doing is alienating herself from the family. One day she is gonna need her brother for something and he is gonna tell her to go kick rocks and he would have every right because she is just such a hateful person. I'm getting a migraine. If I never had another one, it would be too soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted January 24, 2011 Share Posted January 24, 2011 My sister and I have had our issues most def (as you know). Being siblings is like having a war zone at home. I pray (one of the few things I do pray about) that mine and CS's kids are a lot closer than we are to our siblings. I don't want them to bicker like we do or just to see them because 'they are there and have to'. You know? I want them to be able to depend on each other. Maybe that's why I want so many kids.... Why does she not like his girlfriend? I agree, she is only pushing her brother away and one day she will need him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted January 24, 2011 Author Share Posted January 24, 2011 I have no idea why she doesn't like her, they used to be friends. I really thought it had to do with my daughter feeling like the girl was taking her baby brother away because they were super close, always together but now I really don't know. I think my daughter is probably just a miserable person and want's everyone to be miserable with her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sherryberrypie Posted January 24, 2011 Share Posted January 24, 2011 It could very well be the latter! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted January 24, 2011 Author Share Posted January 24, 2011 The boyfriend really helped me to feel better right now, it just makes me love him that much more. I haven't told you guys what happened, partly because I am really really embarrased and ashamed that I could be so stupid but here goes....without knowing, I accidently threw away my granddaughters hearing aids. When I realized what happened, I was crushed. It was too late to retrieve them, they had already been picked up by the garbage truck. My daughter had wrapped them in some paper towels from the school and left them on the counter. It was the weekend and normally Jade won't wear her hearing aids over the weekend unless we are going out. This counter is like the clutter counter, everyone puts everything on that counter. It often resembles something you would see on an episode of hoarders, just papers and toys and everything else that could be crammed on it. So I was cleaning the counter off, just tossing stuff left and right. Saw a wad of paper towels and tossed it. I had no clue until my daughter asked me if I had seen it. I have been so depressed about it, I feel like such an idiot. So my first thought was I am going to just replace them until I found out they are 2,500 dollars for each hearing aid then I started stressing out even more so because I have no idea how I would even get 5000 dollars. I was sitting here at work just thinking about everything that is going on in my life, the hearing aids and the boyfriends bad health and the issues at home with my fueding children and I just started to cry here at work and then he called me. He asked why I was crying and I told him, I was in the middle of an email to see if I can find someplace that sells the aids for less money. He says "honey, don't worry everything will work out because I will help you get the aids if I need to, we'll get it done for Jade". I love him so much. He has his own set of worries to deal with, yet is willing to do whatever to help me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted January 24, 2011 Share Posted January 24, 2011 Aww MG Don't feel bad about throwing them away! Your daughter should have put them up some were safer, not on the counter that is used for clutter! If anything it's her fault. They are her responsibility to take care of. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sherryberrypie Posted January 24, 2011 Share Posted January 24, 2011 I agree. It's not your fault. You couldn't have known that they were balled up in paper towel. That's nice of your bf for sure. It's always so nice to know that someone else has your back! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BellaDonna Posted January 24, 2011 Share Posted January 24, 2011 Awww it wasn't your fault that you threw the hearing adis away. It sucks but it was not on purpose so don't feel guilty!!! Stuff like that happens ALL the time. When I used to work in dentistry people would throw their false TEETH away all the time by mistake. Dentures are really expensive too- some of them would go dumpster diving to find them with no luck and would have be toothless until they could afford new ones and there was the wait to have them made for about a week due to the lab turnover time. Dentures are a lot bigger than hearing aids and people still threw them out all the time.... Paper towels are the culprit every time. It happens to kids retainers a lot too. One kid's lunch lady threw out his retainer. He took it out of his mouth to eat at school, and had placed it in a napkin. When the lunch lady came to wipe off the table she threw out the napkin and the retainer was history. If you call the place that originally made them and explain what happened, they might offer a 2nd pair for a discounted priced or allow for monthly payments- especially if it is for a child. Save up some of those tears for the phone call- they will help immensely. I think you can get a discount. You sound like me....wanting to clear off the cluttered counter. It is one of my pet peeves. If I saw paper towl crumpled up on the counter I'd hurl it into the trash too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted January 24, 2011 Author Share Posted January 24, 2011 Thank you Bella, that really helped a lot. I suppose if my mind wasn't so jumbled I probably would have thought of that too. I am just extremely overwhelmed. The last time I was under this much stress was when I was in the middle of getting custody of the grandbabies. I contacted GLAD last night via email to see if they had any suggestions and I will have my daughter contact the agency that provided the services and even the company that made them to see if there is something we can do. A quick update, took the boyfriend to his appointment this morning with the doctor for a re-check. His feet are still very swollen, the doctor won't release him back to work just yet. He was going over the final results of the chest xray he had last week. They say that there is fluid in the lungs and around the heart, his heart is weak. He also asked us if anyone has talked to us about a transfusion. His HCT-Auto and HGB have continued to drop in number. Currently he is showing 25.6 for HCT and the normal range is 42-52. His HGB currently shows at 8.6 and the normal range is 14.0-18.0 The doctor also wants us to try and get the Cardiologist to move his appointment up a bit sooner. I'm really glad I bought a planner last month. It has proved to be a God send in keeping up with all of his appointments and I also write down his sugar levels and bp readings in it so I can keep accurate records. How about some good news? I just won tickets to see the Harlem Globe Trotters from a local radio station. I was sitting here typing this out and was calling the station and I was the 92nd caller. I think my grandson will enjoy it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted January 25, 2011 Author Share Posted January 25, 2011 The apartment complex I live in is being fumigated today so I am stuck here at a McDonald's (free wi-fi) and no car. My son borrowed my car for the morning. Going to the kidney specialist with the boyfriend later for his appointment. Hoping to hear some kind of positive news, anything would be good at this point. I have dealt with nothing but bad news since last week, a little something good would be so appreciated right now. Hope you are all having a great day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sherryberrypie Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 I hope it goes well! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
renaissancewoman101 Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 Good luck with your bf's appointment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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