OptomisticGirl Posted June 1, 2014 Share Posted June 1, 2014 We are already in the 90's and it's just June. And because we have kick butt humidity, it feels like 100 (last summer our highest temp was 115). L has been saying for the last month it's getting too hot (he's use to it never going over like 70-75) and I kept saying "it's only going to get hotter." He said it again the other day and I was like yeah, it's reaching were I am uncomfortable now. Brutal winter always means brutal summer! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted June 2, 2014 Author Share Posted June 2, 2014 I think Petite would love our California summers. I could totally see her on a beach in her bikini soaking up the Cali sun. lol Just that little bit of time I spent in the sun the other day with the kids was enough to last me a while. Thanks but no thanks, I like the cooler weather. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
petite Posted June 2, 2014 Share Posted June 2, 2014 Very true! During summer I am at the beach in the water daily. Luckily I live by the beach so all I have to do is walk outside. Ah, bikini season how I love thee. Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted June 2, 2014 Author Share Posted June 2, 2014 Living by the beach, you do get somewhat cooler temps though don't you? In Cali if you are near the beach it's usually about 10 degrees cooler and if you are in the valleys it's scorching. I was just thinking the other day I want to take the babies to the beach. I haven't been in a while and I miss shopping on the promenade in Santa Monica. They also have really nice places to have a patio lunch. Ugh, I need to get out more. Now that I think about it, my babies are going to be on summer break this week and I just received my vacation time on the books, about 7 weeks of time. Since Jesse doesn't really want to be out much, I think I will just spend time with my little loves. I hate staying in and I don't think I should just to placate him. I see a beach trip in the near future. Feeling better already. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
petite Posted June 2, 2014 Share Posted June 2, 2014 Yep we get cooler temperatures, more wind. Mostly at night though. However it isn't that noticeable when it's boiling outside lol. But it is definitely better to be in a bikini on the beach than in a suit downtown. Definitely go to the beach with them! The water will also tire them out so once they get home they will be ready to eat and sleep, lol. You have 7 weeks off? That's pretty awesome! I think you will have a great time, shopping, having lunch, it all sounds divine! Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted June 3, 2014 Author Share Posted June 3, 2014 Yeah a total of 7 weeks but I don't take it all at the same time. In fact I rarely take a whole week off, I usually just take days off as I see fit. lol It goes super fast either way. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted June 7, 2014 Author Share Posted June 7, 2014 Working my day off today, 12 hours of OT. It's been a relatively quiet day, so very easy money to say the least. I noticed this morning when I was walking to my car, I have that pain in my disc again. So I'm being extra careful in my movements so that I don't mess up my back. It's probably inevitable but being extra cautious never hurt. I picked up my new glasses the other day from the optometrist. I've received lots of compliments which is always nice. One of my coworkers said I look like a naughty school teacher. HA! I do feel sort of pretty with them, especially since I've done makeup the past two days. Don't know how much longer I will do the makeup thing, I have turned into such a tomboy. I'm much happier with a plain face, jeans and converse. I'm trying to step out of my comfort zone but geeze, that is hard. Sigh... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted June 7, 2014 Author Share Posted June 7, 2014 Oh I almost forgot, the cat is officially out of the bag. My son has announced his engagement. To my surprise my daughter didn't say much, Jesse on the other hand think that my son is making the biggest mistake of his life and wants to talk to him. I actually had a long talk with my son today, he called to chat while he was stuck in traffic. I asked him if he was feeling pressured to marry her. He said it was all his decision, that they have been looking for an apartment together and this is the next logical step for him. Who am I to argue? He's 21, works full time and has a good head on his shoulders. He makes decent money as a diesel mechanic and should he get hired in my company will make a lot more. She's a teacher part time while she finishes her degree then she will teach full time. He said they have worked out on paper what they can afford. Jesse on the other hand thinks that this is a manipulative move on her part. It really doesn't matter what I tell him, he thinks the worst about everything and everyone. My son said there is no rush to get married and no she's not pregnant. LOL We actually talked about the pregnancies in general and I urged him to continue to practice extremely safe sex until he has been tested to see if he is ok to have children. See, many years ago I gave birth to my 3rd child and he was born with Osteogenesis imperfecta type 2. He passed away an hour after birth. The doctors thought it was a random gene mutation until years later my ex husband impregnated his then girlfriend and she delivered a son with the same thing. Her son also passed away. It was then the doctors said whoa, it wasn't a random gene mutation but a genetic issue where my sons will need to be tested to see if they are gene carriers themselves. If they carry the gene then the chances are high their children will be born with the same disease. So we talked about that at length and he assured me they are very careful for that reason but also because they aren't ready financially or mentally to start having children. Whew.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
renaissancewoman101 Posted June 7, 2014 Share Posted June 7, 2014 Glad to see that you son has his priorities straight . What do your new glasses look like? Curious now . I don;t think I see any pics of them on FB. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted June 7, 2014 Author Share Posted June 7, 2014 Glad to see that you son has his priorities straight . What do your new glasses look like? Curious now . I don;t think I see any pics of them on FB. Haven't posted any on facebook yet. Probably because I haven't taken a picture that I actually like. When I do, I will tag you Renny. lol I almost used your real name here. bahaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted June 7, 2014 Author Share Posted June 7, 2014 My daughter called me to say that she got a letter in the mail from my grandson's school. He failed his hearing test in the left ear and needs to be seen by an audiologist. Degree of hearing loss Hearing loss range (dB HL) Normal –10 to 15 Slight 16 to 25 Mild 26 to 40 Moderate 41 to 55 Moderately severe 56 to 70 Severe 71 to 90 Profound 91+ He's showing 20 on the right ear (slight hearing loss) and 50 in the left ear (moderate hearing loss). This probably explains the unintelligible speech for which he is scheduled to start with a speech therapist in August when he enters the first grade. He has to be seen by his primary pediatric doctor and she will refer him to Jade's audiologist at Children's Hospital in Los Angeles. I was trying to do some research on genetic hearing loss. Their paternal grandfather was also deaf but to my knowledge no other family members on that side are hearing impaired. I guess I'm just trying to understand how two of my grandchildren ended up hearing impaired. Sigh... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted June 7, 2014 Share Posted June 7, 2014 What about in their father's family? It could be some recessive deafness gene? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted June 7, 2014 Author Share Posted June 7, 2014 What about in their father's family? It could be some recessive deafness gene? To my knowledge their father doesn't have any hearing loss, just the children's grandfather did. I need to dig deeper and see if anyone else has/had any type of hearing issues. They are out of state now, the kids father and his remaining family. I'm going to message them and see what I can find out. Funny you responded Annie, I thought about you when I was reading an article. It was primarily in medical speak and I was thinking, Annie would probably understand all of this. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted June 7, 2014 Share Posted June 7, 2014 haha, I hope you get some answers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted June 8, 2014 Author Share Posted June 8, 2014 Happy Sunday everyone. I got off work at 10pm last night and was back in the office at 6am today. Didn't sleep well but when do I ever? lol Planning on knocking out some work that I have on my desk and then do my usual coupon clipping, sorting, sale planning type of thing. I need to browse Groupon and Amazon Local and see if there are any deals for outings. I want to take two of my grandsons out as a graduation celebration so to speak. Matthew graduated from the 6th grade with honors and my Aidan graduated from kindergarten. So proud of my little loves. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted June 10, 2014 Author Share Posted June 10, 2014 I was anticipating working my Friday off this week but as luck would have it, the girl doesn't need the day off after all. I can't tell you how incredibly happy I am to have a day to myself. Jesse is back to work so I have the entire day to do whatever I want to do. I'm checking groupon and amazon local as we speak to see if there are any deals in my area for a massage and a facial. I'm going to get my nails done and do some shopping. I haven't had a me day in a while and I'm almost too giddy waiting for this one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
renaissancewoman101 Posted June 10, 2014 Share Posted June 10, 2014 Glad to see that you will have some time for some self-pampering You are always there for others. Time to be be there for yourself Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted June 16, 2014 Author Share Posted June 16, 2014 I did it! I finally did something nice for myself and it was wonderful. I had an appointment on Friday for a one hour massage with aromatic oils and a one hour European facial. I left out of there feeling like a new person. My skin was glowing, my body was relaxed. Later that day I went to get my nails done and had a nice pedicure too. I did a little shopping, not as much as I would have liked but I can't complain. Saturday was my grandson's birthday party. We rented a jumper that had a water slide. It was a nice warm day so the kids spent most of the day in the water. I was able to get a little tan as I wore a sun dress. I spent the entire day on my feet so by the end of the night I was really tired. My feet were swollen and everything just hurt. Yesterday Jesse and I went to pick up a gift and then have some breakfast. I stopped by the mall to see if I could find some Spurs gear since we had plans to go watch the basketball game out last night. Well, by the time I got back from breakfast and the mall I really wasn't feeling well so I laid down and ended up taking a 2 1/2 hour nap. I never nap and when I do it's really only for a short period of time. I still wasn't feeling all that great when I got up so I just picked up some food for Jesse and I and we stayed in and watched the game. I'm still tired and still not quite feeling myself. I plan on calling the doctor today to have him fax me a lab slip so I can get my blood work done. I want to make sure everything is okay with my remaining kidney and to rule out anemia. I don't think I'm anemic, I have been taking my iron pills everyday but I am more tired than usual. Better to be safe than sorry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted August 14, 2014 Author Share Posted August 14, 2014 For those that are wondering why I seemingly dropped off the journal planet, I guess I just didn't feel like talking about how crappy I have been feeling the past few months. It's been six months since the transplant, everything there is going great. The kidney is working famously and he's doing quite well considering they were worried since we did the ABO incompatible transplant but yeah, everything is good so far. The problems I guess are more relationship based. He takes a daily dose of prednisone which causes these outbursts, he's always mad about something. Naturally it rolled over into the relationship. I felt like nothing I did was right, he was always mad. If I didn't take the route he thought I should take, if I didn't honk at the idiot at was coming to close in my lane. I know it wasn't entirely his fault, that is a nasty drug which sadly he will be a slave too for the rest of his life and the anti rejection meds aren't much better. I have talked to several people in a kidney forum and they all say the same thing, the drugs wreak havoc on the person that takes them. A lot of relationships have fallen apart, not all of them but many have. So I tried talking to him about it, we actually talked at great length about the possibility of anger issues arising from the mixture of meds and he said he would do his best to control it before it escalates but when I point out that he's acting irrationally he just gets moodier. I'd say the past 3 months or so I have really felt like a stranger living in his house. We would come home from work, I would try to talk to him and he would ignore me. I would ask a question and get no answer, that type of thing. We stopped talking and I found myself spending more and more time away from his place during the day. I would just go do some couponing or visit with my family. The more I tried to tell him how I was feeling, the more he dismissed my feelings. I would say "Jesse, I feel such and such way " and he would respond with "no you don't or I don't know why you feel that way" even after I have told him why I feel a certain way. So last week I left. He went to work and I was leaving for Vegas with my daughter. I packed up everything in his house and I moved it back home. Needless to say he wasn't happy when he got home to find a letter. Now he wants to talk, now he wants to hear why I'm hurting because he wants to work on it. He didn't seem too interested in working on anything, only when I'm gone. It sucks because I know he loves me, he just isn't capable of showing me. He even admitted that, said he grew up in a non affectionate family and has never been expressive with his feelings with his ex or me and doesn't know how but is willing to try. I don't know what I want right now. I do know that I love him and I miss him but I also deserve to be happy. I deserve to be happy with or without him. So for now, distance is good for me. I still have to work with him but I don't have to go home with him. I don't have to sit in a house with someone I love ignoring me so I guess this is my life for right now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luminousone Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Oh- so glad you posted here to update us! I really wondered. The past few days I was tempted to pm someone to see if they knew what was going on. I was concerned... So sorry he is such a grump. That us no fun to be on the receiving side or to be around. Given the circumstances, I think you made the right choice. You have to take care of yourself. Have you been having fun with your grandkids this summer?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cheetarah Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Hi mamamet, I was just thinking about you yesterday. Knew you were OK because of FB, but wondered why you hadn't made your way around these parts. You do deserve to be happy. You are one of the most awesome ladies I know. I think there's nothing worse than being with people and feeling like you're all alone/lonely, especially when that person is your partner. Is there any kind of in person support group that you could attend? I mean, since this is such a common issue post transplant and how it spills over into relationships. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 big hugs. whenever i've taken prednisone, i've always felt more aggressive. thankfully not in a yelling way, but i feel it welling up inside me. You do deserve to be happy. You are a saint. He should be treating you like a queen, you saved his life!!! I'm mad at him that he is not kinder towards you. Big hugs, please feel free to contact me if you ever want to talk. I hope you had a nice time in Vegas. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sophie274 Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I'm so sorry this is going on. You deserve to be happy and I just hope you figure out what the right decision is for you. You take care of everyone else - take care of yourself! Big hugs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I'm so sorry this is going on Mama. I agree, he should be worshipping the ground you walk on! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted August 15, 2014 Author Share Posted August 15, 2014 Thank you all.... I don't know if there is support group per se but I will contact the transplant social worker tomorrow and let her know what's happening and so she can guide me in the right direction. We had agreed earlier that we would talk after work but that turned into a huge fiasco because I don't believe he is being honest about some issues and the past is a huge deal. Everyone says you have to let go of the past but for me, I'm having a really difficult time because I feel like I am going to get screwed over again. He basically shut down, hardly talked to me, had zero interest in any kind of affection, it was like we were strangers. I felt like he pushed me away a little more each time and to be honest I felt the only reason I was there was to take care of him. (Cook, clean, wash clothes etc). So now that I have left, he suddenly wants to work on our issues. He wants to go to counseling because he said that if hears from a professional that my concerns are legit then he will believe that he is in the wrong. I'm telling you, what you are doing is hurtful and wrong but you have to hear it from a professional? He also suggested that I see a professional because I have emotional issues. Ummm yeah, you think? SMH I forgot who asked about the babies, they were gone for the summer. Matty was in Arizona for three weeks with his bio dad's family and then we took the other three to Vegas to be with their bio dad's family. We picked up Matthew at the halfway point and he also spent the summer in Vegas with his siblings. Their bio dad raised Matty so it's like he has two dads now. They are all back home and I'm here in the big house that we rented and I'm having a hard time adjusting but I guess I will get used to it. Just trying to get through each day. I have good days and I have bad days, today is a bad day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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