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I don't miss her


whitetiger7654

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For those that haven't read the previous posts. I broke up with my long time g/f Monday night. I haven't seen her or talked to her since. But I just don't miss her. I feel more relieved than anything. What does this mean? Did I fall out of love?

 

This sucks because we spent so many years together and I do truly care and love her as a person. I just don't feel the emotional and physical connection anymore.

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All break ups feel like a relief at first. But then after some time, you will start to miss her. This is normal and natural, of course. By then, you two will have to figure out if you two do want each other back, or if it's better to cut your losses and move on for real.

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This is a good sign for you because it reaffirms the fact that you are better off with out her. Nothing worse than dumping someone because logically they don't make sense for you but having to fight your emotions because you miss them terribly. In your case, your mind and emotions towards her are in sinc and thus the feeling of relief.

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I would have to disagree...as a counselor...long term relationships tend to develop these emotions...you feel as though maybe you might be better with someone else...but its your mind that perceives this behavior and gets you to think about it. You two have been together for a longtime these emotions are going to come up...it would be foolish try end it without working on it.

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Well Monday night is still early days; the novelty of the situation can still keep you going at the moment. See how you feel in two weeks time, when it's no longer exciting and different, but is becoming real.

 

Sometimes, though, breakups are like that. When I broke up with my ex, is was such a long time coming that I almost felt healed before it even officially happened, and it wasn't too bad at all. The previous breakup by contrast, was out of the blue and led to total meltdown. Your life situation (what else you have going on, who else is around to distract you etc.) can also make a big difference.

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although, you have distractions and everyone does..its called life...you have to work through the distractions to make a positive difference in your relationship. I wouldn't give up yet...like you said you still care and love her...there is still something there!

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