yourgravity Posted September 22, 2009 Share Posted September 22, 2009 i am truly guilty of this, i'll admit. There was a guy i was seeing, and i just had one lil inkling of doubt that i began to cultivate.... started asking friends what i should do, came on here and posted about it.... stewed and worried over it til i finally put the guy in a corner and asked him where we stood. He ofcourse was taken back, shocked, and inevitably panicked and ended it. Now, im not necessarily going to say that it was wrong to know where i stand, but for some people its a slow transition, and YOU KNOW when youre with one of those. Its pretty obvious.... They take longer to commit. So take the power back! And decide whether you find that acceptable or not and you proactively end it and say its not going the way you thought it should and find someone who will go the same pace, otherwise u have to accept it for what it may be... Youre just there for __________ (fill in the blank .... Lonliness, rebound, tkme filler, bed warmer.... Etc) Im half doing this to encourage myself because last night i worked myself into a tizzy with my current situation and was about to almost do the same thing again.....and it all started with just a lil thought that maybe he's with his ex. Nothing like wasting a whole day on a useless emotion like worry to set u straight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brazilgirl21 Posted September 22, 2009 Share Posted September 22, 2009 The "ex" thought. That is a bad one, specially for me since I've BEEN the ex and been a REALLY annoying ex to my ex's new girl. I'm going on dates with a guy who just ended a relationship and the "ex" thought haunt me as well. I ALMOST ALMOST asked last night, instead I texted: "is anything wrong? you seemed quiet tonight". Well, he said things were great and he was just tired, but I was ALMOST asking where we stand. I'm trying NOT to but it's SO tough. Sorry just rambling on your post. How long have you two been together? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jettison Posted September 22, 2009 Share Posted September 22, 2009 I remember when my now ex was in a panic, worrying that I was with my ex. I wasn't of course, but her jealousy just torched our relationship. Similarly, I've had "crazy feelings" when I've been in a relationship, and they never do me any good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brazilgirl21 Posted September 22, 2009 Share Posted September 22, 2009 I do actually think about my current guy with his ex, but it doesn't kill me that much. I'm not really a jealous person. I'm more worried "he's just not that into me" or I seemed to available than he's with his ex. If he's with his ex, well, he's chosing a relationship that failed over a potential successful one! Good for him... If my actions, however, pushed him away... well that scares me more Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yourgravity Posted September 22, 2009 Author Share Posted September 22, 2009 I remember when my now ex was in a panic, worrying that I was with my ex. I wasn't of course, but her jealousy just torched our relationship. Similarly, I've had "crazy feelings" when I've been in a relationship, and they never do me any good. im just curious, was there a reason to believe that u couldve been with your ex? Like did u and your ex stay friends after the break up? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jettison Posted September 23, 2009 Share Posted September 23, 2009 im just curious, was there a reason to believe that u couldve been with your ex? Like did u and your ex stay friends after the break up? She called me a few times late at night while I was sleeping at my girlfriend's place. I was terrible at setting boundaries, and it kind of cost me that relationship. Jealous woman + man poor at setting boundaries = disaster. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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