greywolf Posted September 22, 2009 Share Posted September 22, 2009 She said the first time they were ona break... but each person sees a "break" differently. I see a break as a time to have personal space, and think about what you want from the relationship... Not to go jump in to bed with the first one that offers.. But thats personal opinion. She also said she cheated a second time.. And didn't say weather that was on a break or not. But that's the risk you take when going on a break. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
static_enginee Posted September 22, 2009 Share Posted September 22, 2009 But that's the risk you take when going on a break. Here's the issue I see. If you are "on break" then you aren't together. And you can do what you want, and you shouldn't be mad about what he may or may not have done. But I also believe that if you are really truly in this for the long run this shouldn't be an issue. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
static_enginee Posted September 22, 2009 Share Posted September 22, 2009 Say nothing and just move on, okay, i would just leave it in the past and not to go back on it and start all over again.. Really?!?! So if someone cheated on you (I would never wish that) you wouldn't want to know? Just keep it from you and "move on"? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
islandj Posted September 28, 2009 Share Posted September 28, 2009 She had drunken sex she can't remember months and months ago, clearly feels guilty about it and won't do it again. It seems like she's punished herself enough...she doesn't need to lose her relationship to. If you just got married and you found out your husband drunkely hooked up with someone so long ago you'd divorce him?? Sheesh. you need for 2 people for the relationship, so the relationship is not only hers and he deserves to know.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
corrin Posted September 28, 2009 Share Posted September 28, 2009 I've cheated on my boyfriend a few times. One night i slept with my friend when we were on a break.. but that is still no excuss. I lied about it to him and said nothing happened. Last winter i got really drunk and slept with another friend, and dont remember. You said "a few times" but only told us about two. Was it more than two times? And, by the way, I think you need better "friends." If they knew you were involved with someone, and if they were your friends, they should have respected that. I agree with others, if you were on a break, then it is not really cheating, provided you guys didn't agree to remain faithful while you were on your break. If you didn't have any kind of understanding, then he took the risk you would do what you did. That's why I would never go on a break. I rarely think time apart helps. Hes made out with 2 people while we were dating and traded naked pictures with someone else. He cheated too and sacrificed the moral high ground. If you tell him, I am sure he will try and convince you there are degrees of cheating. I agree having sex is worse than a kiss. But it is not like your boyfriend is squeaky clean. I know we sound like a wreak but we do love eachother. I know im gunna get "you should break up" from everyone.. but please help me. I've never been so depessed.. my cheating has been eatting away at me and i dont know what to do about it. If i tell him he will break up with me... but i need him. I do.. How long ago did this happen? If this happened recently, I'd say get it out there and be honest. If he cannot live with it, better you know now. At least two of your friends know what you did. God knows who they have told. So there is always the chance your boyfriend finds out about it. If this happened a long time ago, then I am on the fence as to whether I would want to know. If my girlfriend told me she cheated on me last week, I'd leave her immediately. If she told me she cheated on me two years ago, before we were living together, before we were as serious as we are now, maybe I could forgive her. I bit more about the circumstances might be helpful. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hexaemeron Posted September 28, 2009 Share Posted September 28, 2009 Best of luck when no one meets your expectations. I didn't realize love didn't include the ability to forgive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brokenpogostick Posted September 29, 2009 Share Posted September 29, 2009 I have met someone that meets my expectations - my husband - who also commented on this thread and agrees wholeheartedly with my views on cheating. I feel sorry for the rest of you who don't have 100% trust in your relationship. Love does include the ability to forgive, but adultery is the only reason the bible says it's ok to dissolve a marriage. I realize that these two are not married (thank god), but the goal of dating and relationships is supposed to be to find a compatible person for marriage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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