hers Posted September 9, 2009 Author Share Posted September 9, 2009 Well you do have a point batya, but I could tell that wasn't a normal thing for him, just the way he reacted to that request. And the other couple of times we got together, we used condoms and didn't try that again. He's actually one of the first guys I've been with who I didn't have to ask if he even had one. Most guys just try to stick it in without even asking if I have stds or am on birth control. So it definitely was not something he seemed to do often. By bringing up the house/car/job thing, I just meant he's responsible enough for all of that stuff. He doesn't come from money, that much I figured out. And he remodeled his house himself but yea I get your point. In terms of jokes like that at work functions and family gatherings, I think most guys do know there's a time and a place for it all. Every guy I've dated with that sort of sense of humour has known that at least for sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jonny15 Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 I'd hope it's ok, because that is my sense of humour all the time. But that could be because sex is all I ever think about. haha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Organs Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 So let me ask another question: what about girls with the same sense of humour? Is it a turn off to guys or do some guys like a girl who can make these jokes with the rest of them and join in? Are you kidding?? I actively look for that in a girl! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catdancer Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Hey Hers!! I'm going to be honest in saying that this guy sounds like alot of fun, he's funny, charismatic, obviously good in the sack, he's responsible, mature and has his head on straight. And I think that he is responsible. Batya has some good points, but come on. I'm like you, in the heat of the moment, knowing that I was on birth control, I would have rode him like a cowgirl! lol I love a sense of humor and I crack the dirty/tacky/tasteless jokes right along with the guys. I have a "perverted" sense of humor and I LOVE it. I'm not dry and snooty, I'm just me. And I really value a person that can be comfortable enough to just be them. It sounds like you really like this guy, and I'm glad. It's about time Hers got some luvin!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Hey, it's your call as to how much you need to know about a person before you have an opinion about their character/integrity - I would need much longer and the sex situation would be a red flag to me (almost every guy I've been with in any intimate situation we've most often discussed birth control beforehand or in the rare time we didn't, at the time). To each her own. It sounds like he meets your needs right now and that you're having fun. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Hey Hers!! I'm going to be honest in saying that this guy sounds like alot of fun, he's funny, charismatic, obviously good in the sack, he's responsible, mature and has his head on straight. And I think that he is responsible. Batya has some good points, but come on. I'm like you, in the heat of the moment, knowing that I was on birth control, I would have rode him like a cowgirl! lol I love a sense of humor and I crack the dirty/tacky/tasteless jokes right along with the guys. I have a "perverted" sense of humor and I LOVE it. I'm not dry and snooty, I'm just me. And I really value a person that can be comfortable enough to just be them. It sounds like you really like this guy, and I'm glad. It's about time Hers got some luvin!!! I don't think someone who doesn't prefer constant dirty/tasteless jokes is dry/snooty. I know I'm not, it's just that that type of humor is often easy to come up with since using the words/slang has shock value to some people - which is why it quickly bores me especially if it's the person's typical focus/sense of humor. I didn't know that that made a person like me dry or snooty - learn something new every day I guess ;-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cognitive_Canine Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 i love dead baby jokes, abortion jokes, etc. they're funny. and like you say, there's a time and a place. it's not condoning anything. it's just jokes. but does it say anything about the guy otherwise? like how woudl i know if he's a bad or good guy based on his sense of humour? I look for sense of humour as one of the biggest turn ons for me, so if a guy can make me laugh, i'm golden. but how much is too much? Yeah, I definitely am attracted to guys with no shame. Which is basically the complete opposite of my boyfriend. He's such a straight laced boy who has such high morals. I love that about him though. I can appreciate both types of boys but I've never allowed myself to date guys I've deemed "bad for me". Unfortunately, I'm attracted to a lot of guys who would definitely be bad for me. I can't say I wouldn't date a guy like this, I just haven't let myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jengh Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 How come you can say humour instead of humor but I can't say centre instead of center? ...just saying. Just so I don't get deleted for off-topic... I don't mind pervy senses of humor. It cracks me up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scorpion Fury Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 I think it's funny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hers Posted September 9, 2009 Author Share Posted September 9, 2009 Cat: nah I'm not interested in this guy. At least not romantically. We'll keep in touch and hook up when I go back home to Florida sometimes. And he's from daytona and visits his family down there often so he'll probably call me when he goes down once I'm living in orlando but that's the extent of it. Just sex. I'm only using him as an example b/c he's the most recent one I've come in contact with. But that guy M, the one I was (am?) nuts about doesn't really have this sort of sense of humour. In fact I heard him make a joke about nuts once and I was surprised b/c I'd never heard him talk like that. But he's still funny, just in different ways and I still think he's an incredible guy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tiredofvampires Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 I'm pretty much no-holds-barred when it comes to jokes -- I love dirty humor, twisted humor and un-PC humor. However, the sicker it is, the more skill required in its delivery -- proper timing as well as context. For instance, using words for people that are derogatory can be hilarious -- but it all depends on how that's being used. It has to not be used mindlessly as a slam against someone, but rather a clever critique of some kind to fly with me. And if a guy is telling some really raunchy jokes, he also has to demonstrate that he can mix it up with more restrained or subtle jokes, too. Crude jokes that involve no punchlines or irony or any sort of quirky little innuendo bug me. If it's just talking about body parts or functions for the sake of themselves, then it's not funny. Also, there is a line between a joke that's mean for the sake of poking fun at meaness, and a joke that's just MEAN. The latter I don't like. Some misogynist humor does that. I don't like jokes that make me think the joke-teller actually has an axe to grind and is taking his aggression out with humor. But what you described in your OP is perfectly cool. It's light duty as far as I'm concerned. And I certainly wouldn't call it "perverted." I do a lot more hardcore joke-cracking than that. Sometimes I feel like I'm putting guys off when I joke, for some reason. Like it's not ladylike or something. I certainly do have a major potty mouth when I'm in a good mood. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JeckyllNHyde Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 How do you girls feel about guys with that sort of sense of humour? Do they have long-term potential or is it a sign of maturity or lack of desire for growing up and committing to something? Many of my exes had this sort of humour. Like my one ex would say things to his guy friends like "You left your underwear over here last night, darling". A guy I met this weekend poured a little alcohol in his hand and said "I'm just trying to get my date for the night drunk". I like this sort of humour, but I'm wondering what it says about guys in the long run and if they are valuable somehow. I'm not currently dating anyone right now but I'm curious what others' thoughts are about guys like this. I find it funny. But there's different types of guys with different types of perverted humor. The kind you describe is funny. Doesn't say immature at all to me. However... LOL, there's a point where it becomes plain creepy when the guys don't stop with the jokes. Not exactly attractive when I have to picture the guy with another dude. The kind of "humor(s)" I dislike and which say immature/not ready to be with a woman: -talking about every/random girls "chests"/va jay jays/butts in a rude way. I find some jokes funny but sometimes guys can say that stuff and it just makes me realise they want to be loads of girls, not one. -guys who make fun of girls they've had sex with in the past or presently. While everyone knows who the girls are. Keeping them annonymous is ok. I always have a really dark sense of humor. All kinds of jokes like abortion, one night stands, being drunk, etc. My guy doesn't have as much of a sense of humor when it comes to that stuff lol. It's ok though, but I do have to tone it down a bit at times. You gotta know when to make certain jokes.. same goes for the guys. Some guys in my school/uni for instance are soooo oblivious when they've crossed lines. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissDashwood Posted September 12, 2009 Share Posted September 12, 2009 How do you girls feel about guys with that sort of sense of humour? Do they have long-term potential or is it a sign of maturity or lack of desire for growing up and committing to something? Many of my exes had this sort of humour. Like my one ex would say things to his guy friends like "You left your underwear over here last night, darling". A guy I met this weekend poured a little alcohol in his hand and said "I'm just trying to get my date for the night drunk". I like this sort of humour, but I'm wondering what it says about guys in the long run and if they are valuable somehow. I'm not currently dating anyone right now but I'm curious what others' thoughts are about guys like this. It really, really depends. That's the uniform answer here. A guy can be an obnoxious jerk with this kind of humor and it comes off tasteless, ogreish, and obscene. Or, a guy can be clever with his innuendo, perverted in a sexy way, and use his flare for raunch for naughty ends rather than just nuisance-y ends. I think it's about delivery, direction, and seriousness. Sometimes guys just seem genuinely piggish, or they can clearly be jokesters who know how to time it. Also, the frequency of comments can be a problem. Again, it depends on the guy. If you're the type to respond to the same sense of humor too, you're more likely to see the distinctions. Depends on the guy and what you like/can put up with. I personally like innuendo and having fun with words and sort of leaning towards the gutter, but outright vulgarity is just disgusting more often than not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 So let me ask another question: what about girls with the same sense of humour? Is it a turn off to guys or do some guys like a girl who can make these jokes with the rest of them and join in? I'd like to know that as well. My humor can be pretty tasteless at times lol. I have a new requirement for people that I ever hook up with. They need to get dark humor. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JeckyllNHyde Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 I would do the same. It was also a great way to date guys b/c we'd have stuff in common and just joke away. But.. for me it never ended well. Just my experienc, but the guys never took me seriously. One of them dumped me and later on got a new gf, who he treatd like a "real girlfriend". Ouch. With another guy I dated, things ended well and we're great friends. Better friends, then when we where dating, since we never truly felt like a couple.. more like buds. Ironic. I'm dying to see what guys have to say about your question above. I always feel like I can get along with guys b/c I "get" their sense humor and genuinly love those types of jokes. Alot of other girls I know maybe don't and would even be offended. It really depends though, I mean some jokes can be taken TOO far. LIke I said, I doubt my guy would b able to deal with my twisted sense of humor lol, to a point that he could laugh at each and every one of my jokes, like some other people. But still.. it's not a huge problem. In general I always feel like I need to tone it down a bit.. goes with knowing when it's ok to make dark jokes and with whom not to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Perfect Dark Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 I think it gets old real fast, but most males are like this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
G3LesPaul Posted September 15, 2009 Share Posted September 15, 2009 I have this type of sense of humor but my sense of humor is so wide in many ways. I am still a virgin and would never treat a girl like crap even with this sense a humor Yet some guys dont have that sense of humor and do Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wazza Posted September 16, 2009 Share Posted September 16, 2009 I know you addressed this to girls, but as a guy who loves dirty humor and has had multiple successful long term relationships, I would say that men with perverted senses of humor can be just as valuable in long term relationships as any other "normal" guys. To be honest, most guys make perverted or dirty jokes frequently, but some are just more likely to say it in front of girls than others. We may be quick to find double entendres and penis references in casual conversations, but we can also be very sensitive to the needs and wants of people we care about. that's my input Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hers Posted September 16, 2009 Author Share Posted September 16, 2009 Thanks wazza. How do you feel about girls with the same sense of humour? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted September 16, 2009 Share Posted September 16, 2009 I know you addressed this to girls, but as a guy who loves dirty humor and has had multiple successful long term relationships, I would say that men with perverted senses of humor can be just as valuable in long term relationships as any other "normal" guys. To be honest, most guys make perverted or dirty jokes frequently, but some are just more likely to say it in front of girls than others. We may be quick to find double entendres and penis references in casual conversations, but we can also be very sensitive to the needs and wants of people we care about. that's my input Actually, not most of the men I know -- and I know enough about how they when they are when they are around just the guys (or "girls" as you put it, lol) -- once in awhile, sure, but it wouldn't be thought of as funny if it was a steady diet because it's too easy to throw in those terms for the shock value. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brisby Posted September 16, 2009 Share Posted September 16, 2009 Not many people know it but I have a pretty perverted sense of humor. I think that is why I tend to get along better with men rather than women because I usually understand their innuendos and I can get pretty raunchy sometimes myself. It all depends on the guy I'm around though and how he takes it. If I know he doesn't like that sort of thing, I'll keep quiet but I don't see our relationship working out if I can't let lose every once in awhile. So for me, I would love to have a guy match my humor. I think twisted/perverted jokes can be really hilarious but I would have to feel comfortable with him and know that both of us are just shooting the sh*t and don't really mean to be insulting/sexist/racist/etc. when we do it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Firecracker Posted September 16, 2009 Share Posted September 16, 2009 I know you addressed this to girls, but as a guy who loves dirty humor and has had multiple successful long term relationships I found this funny. My humor is hard for people to get too. I can't go much further than a nice fart or poop joke. I'm dainty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hexaemeron Posted September 16, 2009 Share Posted September 16, 2009 Well, I for one am SHOCKED. I'll have you know I'm nothing, NOTHING if not a paragon of class, taste and judicious commentary. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hers Posted September 16, 2009 Author Share Posted September 16, 2009 To think they made a movie about that deadbeat gahndi! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hexaemeron Posted September 16, 2009 Share Posted September 16, 2009 To think they made a movie about that deadbeat gahndi! "A yankee from New Jersey... You're a profile in courage, Blanche!" Seriously though, I have a totally gutter sense of humor. I love to laugh. I always look for that in friends and partners. =) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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