Money issue, don't want to hurt my parents feelings...

[kevinm]

So, as many folks here know, I have a broken ankle. I do have insurance through work, however, as anyone knows medical bills can be unexpected. Anyway, I was talking to my folks the other night and they asked how my ankle was doing, etc. I thought nothing of it, just a conversation with the parents, catching up on what's going on in our lives, etc. Well on Saturday I get a letter from my Mom with a check for $1000 inside. She writes something like "Hope this helps with the bills."

 

My problem is this... I don't want to offend my parents by not accepting their help, but the thing is I certainly don't need their help. I'm 34 years old, have my own house, a great job, have no debt, have investments in the stock market, savings accounts, etc. Not to get into personal financials, but heck I've got $7K sitting in my checking account. It's not like I can't afford to pay out 3-4K out on this ankle. Sure it sucks, I don't like spending money on this kinda stuff, but that's life.

 

Equally, my folks are very well off. They have two houses, travel the world over, and so on. $1000 bucks is nothing for them. So I know if by accepting the money they won't be eating beans or anything... I guess I feel like they are sort of treating me like a baby.

 

So do I reject the check and risk hurting my parents feelings? Or do I say "Thanks" and cash in?

 

-Kevin

[renaissancewoman101]

I'd take it, say thanks, and cash it in.

 

In this volatile economy, who knows if they will have their job tomorrow.

 

Your parents care about you and your well being and this is their way of showing it.

[JeckyllNHyde]

I'd try to give it back by just nicely saying you can handle the finances and aren't in any sort of trouble.

But if they make a fuss about it just keep it.

[NowandZen]

Statistically speaking, you will be taking care of your parents financially, for some period of time, before they die.

 

If it concerns you, put it in a money market, and make it the first check for their long term care.

[Casey13]

Non-issue. Take the money and next wedding anniversary or their birthdays just get them something extra special. It will be like returning the money in a non-direct way if you know what I mean

[karvala]

Send it to me. Problem solved.

[hers]

keep it and buy them an extra nice christmas/birthday/anniversary gift.

[kevinm]

Thanks for the opinions guys...

 

I think I'm going to cash it, but put it in savings. That way I can either use it later if/when I do indeed need it or give it back passively as casey13 suggested. I feel rejecting it would be sort of rejecting their love, which I don't want to do. I know the money isn't a big deal, it's the thought behind it. At times it's hard for me to be gracious, but I'm trying.

 

Nowandzen... not going to happen, fortunately. My parents are well off, and prepared for their own long term care. I'm lucky in that everyone in my family is successful financially speaking. No one borrows money from anyone.

 

Karvala... thanks for the laugh

 

-Kevin

[shikashika]

I say take it.

 

I think it's sweet.

 

Parents like to help out because they care about you. Have you never given things/ gifts to friends family because you care?

 

I have.. and I just want to do it because I care about them.. same way your parents are doing for you.

[NowandZen]

Thanks for the opinions guys...

 

I think I'm going to cash it, but put it in savings. That way I can either use it later if/when I do indeed need it or give it back passively as casey13 suggested. I feel rejecting it would be sort of rejecting their love, which I don't want to do. I know the money isn't a big deal, it's the thought behind it. At times it's hard for me to be gracious, but I'm trying.

 

Nowandzen... not going to happen, fortunately. My parents are well off, and prepared for their own long term care. I'm lucky in that everyone in my family is successful financially speaking. No one borrows money from anyone.

 

Karvala... thanks for the laugh

 

-Kevin

 

 

That being the case, pay it forward. There's always someone in need.

[karvala]

That being the case, pay it forward. There's always someone in need.

 

Hey, I got in there first!

[Crazyaboutdogs]

There seems to be a rash of threads on here lately from men who feel put out when their parents give them money as a helping hand. Parents like to do things for their children..they worry about their children and they sometimes give money as a way to help them out financially. There is no need to "pay back" the money by giving the money back with financial favours to them. Your pay back is showing appreciation and love. These are your parents, not an acquaintance where you feel like you owe them a nice material possession or monetary gift in return. This was done in the spirit of love and family..the spirit of loving their child and wanting the best for their child. By feeling put out, a slap to your ego and pride, and owing them something else so that your pride is assuaged, you are tainting their gesture of goodwill. It is kind of like if you see someone fall down and hurt themself, you go over to help them and then they pull out their wallet and hand you a $20 bill to thank you for helping them up off the street. It is an insult to the gesture of goodwill.