DN Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 The possession of condoms is prima facie evidence of cheating or intentions to cheat unless it is clear they were overlooked from a previous relationship. So the reason for the possession needs to be convincing and hers just are not. If they were 'left over' from a previous relationship, she could just throw them out. But she claims she doesn't like to throw personal items in the trash in case her fingerprints will lead police to suspect her of committing a crime if one happens to be committed in that area in the time between her throwing the item into the trash and the trash being disposed of. If she is so paranoid about her fingerprints on the pack - why not just wipe them off? If she wanted to bring them home to her crime-free home for disposal why transfer them from a back-pack to a purse? This story has more holes than a piece of Swiss cheese. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waveseer Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 I disagree, there is no reason to believe she did not intend to use those condoms with her partner at some point in the future. Having condoms implies intention to have sex using condoms (or making water balloons), it does not indicate who the participants are intended to be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Firecracker Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 There's good news and bad news.... The good news is she's using a condom... Wait a minute, thats also the bad news.... Rep Points! This lady is messing around. She's scared the police will fingerprint condoms in the trash? Come on, now. You really don't believe that, do you? When you get three different answers to a question, that should make you think. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bad Wolf Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 If she was cheating why would she use condoms if she's on birth control? Just cause he REASON was an odd one doesn't mean she was bsing... People are weird, they say, do and believe in weird things all the time.. My flat mate believes lavender scented cleaning products can turn people gay... Don't ruin something cause a few people here jump to conclusions based on what you've told us which is pretty much nothing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 I disagree, there is no reason to believe she did not intent to use those condoms with her partner at some point in the future. Having condoms implies intention to have sex using condoms (or making water balloons), it does not indicate who the participants are intended to be.But she did not claim that was the reason to have them. She came up with a ludicrous excuse. All I can say to to the OP is: please don't prove P.T. Barnum right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bad Wolf Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Rep Points! This lady is messing around. She's scared the police will fingerprint condoms in the trash? Come on, now. You really don't believe that, do you? When you get three different answers to a question, that should make you think. So you can't have more than one reason to do something? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waveseer Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 If she was cheating why would she use condoms if she's on birth control? Just cause he REASON was an odd one doesn't mean she was bsing... People are weird, they say, do and believe in weird things all the time.. My flat mate believes lavender scented cleaning products can turn people gay... Don't ruin something cause a few people here jump to conclusions based on what you've told us which is pretty much nothing. Exactly, does the OP think she is a considerate cheater who would be so careful as to not bring diseases home? Give me a break. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bad Wolf Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Why does she need condoms if you two don't use them? Why did she need to take them out of her backpack and put them in her purse if she was going to throw them away - why not leave them in the backpack? Her fingerprints would be on any item she threw in the trash. What a lame reason. Why did she hesitate about throwing them out if, as she claims, she was intending to throw them away anyway? Maybe she thought it would be easier to remember to throw them out since they're right there. Just cause it's lame, doesn't mean she doesn't believe it. Ever think that she just didn't care that much? She obviously didn't think having them was a big issue which it ISN'T. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waveseer Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Maybe she thought it would be easier to remember to throw them out since they're right there. Just cause it's lame, doesn't mean she doesn't believe it. Ever think that she just didn't care that much? She obviously didn't think having them was a big issue which it ISN'T. Well, it wouldn't be if she were with someone who had no trouble giving her the benefit of the doubt, or maybe didn't look for reasons to doubt at all? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bad Wolf Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Exactly, does the OP think she is a considerate cheater who would be so careful as to not bring diseases home? Give me a break. They could also be for if she forgot to take her pill.. And she just got a lil embarrassed for carrying them around and said w/e came to mind at the time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Firecracker Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 None of my GF's ever carried condoms in their purses/bags, and I don't know of any of my female friends that do either. That's just weird. I understand carrying tampons/pads, makeup, etc. etc....but condoms? I also would NEVER carry condoms. And not another woman I have known does it either. Why would anyone carry condoms around with them unless they plan to use them on the run. When we used condoms, they were purchased and put in the bedroom, where they stayed until they are used up. Then we repeat that. Buy them, put in drawer, use and repeat. Neither of us have ever packed them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bad Wolf Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Well, it wouldn't be if she were with someone who had no trouble giving her the benefit of the doubt, or maybe didn't look for reasons to doubt at all? Exactly! Look at the reason he asked her if she had any in the first place! She could of just wanted to avoid an argument cause she knows how he gets. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bad Wolf Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 I also would NEVER carry condoms. And not another woman I have known does it either. Why would anyone carry condoms around with them unless they plan to use them on the run. When we used condoms, they were purchased and put in the bedroom, where they stayed until they are used up. Then we repeat that. Buy them, put in drawer, use and repeat. Neither of us have ever packed them. I was with my ex for 2.5 years and we carried them on us all the time... Even when she was on the pill. Sex isn't always planned and sometimes people forget to take the pill.. My ex did, a couple time thank god we carried condoms. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waveseer Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 The question is, why were they in her backpack to begin with? That is the only good question. Maybe she could have had a good answer if she hadn't felt accused. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ac143 Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 I also would NEVER carry condoms. And not another woman I have known does it either. Why would anyone carry condoms around with them unless they plan to use them on the run. When we used condoms, they were purchased and put in the bedroom, where they stayed until they are used up. Then we repeat that. Buy them, put in drawer, use and repeat. Neither of us have ever packed them. Im the exact same way & I dont know any women either that carry around condoms BUT this could be the exact explaination as to why they were in her purse...she found them in her backpack and put them in her purse so she could throw them out. Right? Im not sure why everyone is jumping on this girl and saying she is a cheater, just from this incident. I HAVE found condoms in my backpack and suitcases etc that I forgot where there and if I wasn't home I would probably do the same, put in my purse to toss later. AND if my SO asked me about that & I was off guard I would probably say something lame too...strange things come out of my mouth sometimes for no reason whatsoever lol And yes, we used condoms so when we traveled we packed them and I found them months and months later. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waveseer Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 The thing is, she has shown no other signs. Does anyone realize how unusual that is? If someone is cheating and under scrutiny then there are ALWAYS signs. You can't sneak off to have sex with someone and then turn back time now can you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bad Wolf Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 "They could also be for if she forgot to take her pill.. And she just got a lil embarrassed for carrying them around and said w/e came to mind at the time" the defenses for this lady are getting more and more ridiculous OK if that was the case wouldn't have been th first answer??? How did she expect to have sex with her boyfriend w/o him knowing she is using a condom, I owuld not want to date any of the lady that are coming to this woman's defense Spur of the moment thing, she said what popped into her head to avoid an argument. There are a lot of reason as to why she said what she did, people don't need to automatically jump to cheating. I wouldn't want to date someone that thinks the reason someone would carry a condom around is so they can cheat. you must have some major trust issues, right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waveseer Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Spur of the moment thing, she said what popped into her head to avoid an argument. There are a lot of reason as to why she said what she did, people don't need to automatically jump to cheating. I wouldn't want to date someone that thinks the reason someone would carry a condom around is so they can cheat. you must have some major trust issues, right? Exactly, and also my main point. The way I see it, no offense OP, the problem is yours primarily and then hers because she's the one trying to get along with your suspicious nature. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waveseer Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 wave, I've been trying to figure out your reasoning and logic, and for the life of me, I can't see it. Is the OP really not justified in being suspicious? I can only speak for myself of course, but I completely understand the suspicion and if it were me, I would have taken it a step further than just not speaking with her for a few days. its going beyond devils advocate to suggest that he in fact has the problem here. The reason I am offering innocent explanations is because we only have his spin on things. He has been suspicious of her in the past and it turned out to be unfounded. Unless he has a reason other than the presence of condoms (which she doesn't need for birth control) then I don't see a clear reason why he should be suspicious. Nor do I see are reason why he should have been suspicious in the first round. So, unless there are facts we don't know about (like these aren't the only signs or the only two rounds), my conclusion can only be that he is suspicious by nature and she is entirely innocent. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProtestTheHero Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 When's the last time you two have used condoms to have sex? If it's been longer than a year, giving her the benefit of the doubt now when you randomly find them in her purse seems like a pretty solid reason to be suspicious. I would want to know why she has them if you two hadn't used them in a while. It's one thing to trust, and it's another thing to be naieve. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Firecracker Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 She said she couldn't put them in the trash at their own place because the police might fingerprint them. If anyone here believes that, then kudos to you for your trusting nature. This couple doesn't use condoms and have been together a very long time. I'd bet my 401-K on this one. And that is my last comment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 I thought the thing about the fingerprints was that she didn't want to throw them away at school in case they found them and fingerprinted them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waveseer Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 ga, does it matter that she's his gf and not his wife? I think it might, a husband would have vastly more intimate knowledge of his spouses comings and goings and may not consciously notice anything but it registers nonetheless. Maybe she lies to get him off her back? Maybe he accuses her in such a way that it brings out her "bad child" reaction? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Firecracker Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 This would be understandable if a person were paranoid schizophrenic, but otherwise just downright goofy. I thought the thing about the fingerprints was that she didn't want to throw them away at school in case they found them and fingerprinted them. "So then I asked well you could have tossed them at our place or any trash can outside of work. She then told me the following" "I don't like throwing personal stuff in trash cans" "What if something happens and the police find those condoms and my fingerprints are on them?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 This would be understandable if a person were paranoid schizophrenic, but otherwise just downright goofy. "So then I asked well you could have tossed them at our place or any trash can outside of work. She then told me the following" "I don't like throwing personal stuff in trash cans" "What if something happens and the police find those condoms and my fingerprints are on them?" oh, hmmm.... That is a bit odd. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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