SapphireNoir10 Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Hmm, and given this thread you made about her this seems even more suspicious: ] Her excuses do seem really weird and ridiculous. I'd be getting suspicious if i was you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cognitive_Canine Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Even if you two don't use condoms you might need them if she messes up a pill cycle or you have a pregnancy scare and decide to use double protection for a while. Good condoms are kind of expensive. Why throw them away if you might use them and they are perfectly good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cognitive_Canine Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Hmm, and given this thread you made about her this seems even more suspicious: ] Yeah, she's a suspicious person. Tread carefully OP, you might be getting played here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Even if you two don't use condoms you might need them if she messes up a pill cycle or you have a pregnancy scare and decide to use double protection for a while. Good condoms are kind of expensive. Why throw them away if you might use them and they are perfectly good.That would make sense if she claimed that was the reason - but she didn't. She claimed she forgot about them and was going to throw them away. Given the other thread I quoted, I think the OP has good reason to be highly suspicious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cognitive_Canine Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 That would make sense if she claimed that was the reason - but she didn't. She claimed she forgot about them and was going to throw them away. Given the other thread I quoted, I think the OP has good reason to be highly suspicious. I'm on the same boat as you now that I looked at his other thread. She could at least be a GOOD liar by this point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thistime Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 DN is correct...dude I am waaay sorry...but.. coming from a reformed cheater (who was, ashamedly..very good at it) she is either cheating, or seriously considering it. i think at this point you have no choice but to confront her with the evidence, and her lies. she is in direct contact with someone she shouldnt be..he probabaly knows not to call any other time then at 3 a.m.....and leave a voicemail. also...like i said...she is carrying condoms b/c she is planning on needing them!! BTW...what kind of shape were they in when you discovered them? Did they look fairly new? I mean...condom wrappers dont hold up well to transportation...if they were indeed old, and had been forgotten about...they would look that way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProtestTheHero Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Check the dates if possible. With this thread and your past thread I would have already dumped her without thinking too much about it, but that's me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kaiser_Soze Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 There's good news and bad news.... The good news is she's using a condom... Wait a minute, thats also the bad news.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jackie100 Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 I would be concerned. This happened with my ex twice... He always carried a "man-bag" with vitamins inside and he told me to "never" touch it or open it. So one day I did anyways. It was a few hours before he claimed to go to "San Diego" for the weekend with a friend to do some "work". Inside the bag I found a bunch of condoms and girls phone numbers! I had a feeling the numbers were those of hookers from Craigslist due to his history so me being the smart detective that I am, I plugged the phone numbers in the search button on CL and I was able to find the EXACT ads that he responded to... And then my ex claimed that the #'s and condoms belonged to his overweight cousin and that he was trying to get his cousin layed because no girls liked him and his cousin threw the numbers in his bag At the time I actually believed him.. And there was another time when I put my hand in his pocket and found a condom. I tripped out and he said he bought it along for us in case I wanted to have sex at the beach... All total lies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LostSpartan Posted August 28, 2009 Author Share Posted August 28, 2009 Whoa ok let me update. The voicemail thread was a serious problem. I was about to dump her and demanded she at least call Sprint. Sprint looked into the problem and realized it was some sort of relogging update or something to her blackberry. They sent us a log of all the voicemail logs that were not actually calls. I was on the phoen when I heard this. They corrected the bug and that problem went away. Trust me I was going to dump her but they cleared that up. Regarding the purse, I'm a bit amazing how some of you are so clung to me snooping in her purse. Now for the second time, ha No I wasn't looking in her purse. I'm man enough that If I had a reason, a rather serous reason. I would demand she do it in front of me. As of right now, shes not doing anything else. So I'm just going to watch her closely. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Speranza Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Well I havent' checked too closely, but it seems to me that all the women on here are telling you that it's suspicious... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cheeks18 Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Like I said, just ask her about condoms in her purse again like a month or 2 from now, if there in there dump her if there not false alarm. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunshine1 Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 last night, as we were heading to bed. I had a odd thought. The night before i had a dream that her ex-boyfriend came over and tried to shoot us. So, for some reason i just started wondering if she carried condoms on her. what??????? How does having a dream her ex tried to shoot you have anything to do with condoms? Why are those two sentences next two each other. Also, why cant she carry condoms? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jettison Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 This whole thread strikes of paranoia. Sure, she could be banging the office (derogatory word for promiscuous woman) , but a few condoms in her purse isn't any kind of proof, nor is her "shady" excuses. Think about the times when you've been cornered about something that you weren't guilty of and then had to try to explain yourself to someone, in convincing fashion, even though you knew it was patently absurd that you'd have to engage in the exercise to begin with. Even when you're truthful, you can STILL end up coming accross like a liar. Think further about the times when you're sick and you've called into work. Do you sound happy, light, airy, and chipper on the phone when you're telling your boss that you won't make it in? Or rather, do you sound somber, sick, and put out? Miraculously, you'll usually sound a little bit better once you're not talking to the boss, but it doesn't mean that you're still not sick. This is the same thing. If your significant other is hinting to you that you're cheating, and you're doing no such thing, you just want them to shut the hell up. You don't want to have to defend yourself over something that's absurd. So, you do and say what you can to convince them that they have nothing to worry about, and SOMETIMES, it can come accross like you're lying or embellishing when you're doing anything but. In conclusion, the condoms mean nothing. The explanation of the condoms mean nothing. She may or may not be cheating on you, but this petty stuff is just inconsequential unless backed up by a whole lot more. And if you're with someone that you can't trust then you shouldn't be with her in the first place. Since relationships are built on trust, and you have no trust for her, you really have no relationship anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LostSpartan Posted August 28, 2009 Author Share Posted August 28, 2009 After reading all of this I now agree. Thats what I'm going to just sit back and observe and ask her in a few weeks if she has condoms again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cognitive_Canine Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Do you think she might be a compulsive liar? Why make stuff up when the truth was fine with the voicemail debacle? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 If you don't need condoms for any reason - why have them? The explanations don't hold water even if the condoms might. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waveseer Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 I expect to garner some opposing viewpoints for this, however, I think in cases such as these it's important to remember one thing: The problems you've raised so far are yours, not hers. She is okay with having condoms around, you aren't. She was okay with the 3am messages, you weren't. If I were her I'd be starting to wonder right now why you keep stirring the pot. I'd be wondering if you were hiding your own shady behavior by being overly suspicious. I might even begin to scrutinize you more closely for inconsistencies. Nobody likes being held under a microscope and I bet you wouldn't either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scorpion Fury Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 I expect to garner some opposing viewpoints for this, however, I think in cases such as these it's important to remember one thing: The problems you've raised so far are yours, not hers. She is okay with having condoms around, you aren't. She was okay with the 3am messages, you weren't. If I were her I'd be starting to wonder right now why you keep stirring the pot. I'd be wondering if you were hiding your own shady behavior by being overly suspicious. I might even begin to scrutinize you more closely for inconsistencies. Nobody likes being held under a microscope and I bet you wouldn't either. i don't think being suspicious of 3 am phone calls with "bill collector" as an explanation, or condoms in the purse when we don't use them, is holding someone under the microscope. I think those are legitimate concerns. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
orangesoda Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 None of my GF's ever carried condoms in their purses/bags, and I don't know of any of my female friends that do either. That's just weird. I understand carrying tampons/pads, makeup, etc. etc....but condoms? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 I cannot imagine that a guy found with condoms that he didn't need for his relationship and came up with such lame excuses for possessing them (in case the police found his fingerprints on the package at a crime scene!!!) would be believed. The excuse is so patently absurd as to beggar belief. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waveseer Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 i don't think being suspicious of 3 am phone calls with "bill collector" as an explanation, or condoms in the purse when we don't use them, is holding someone under the microscope. I think those are legitimate concerns. Here's the thing though, assume for a moment she was innocent on both counts. We know she was innocent on the 3am count so let's give her the benefit of the doubt for a moment's discussion. So, the man I am currently exclusively committed to has now found two reasons to doubt my intentions. But he doesn't just doubt them, he grills me, he wants proof of my innocence when I haven't even done anything wrong. Some would consider that harassment. I personally would walk out on someone before I would give any proof of my innocence, that is just plain ogreish. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Innocent of what? Making up absurd excuses? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waveseer Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 DN, we only get one side of the story. People say all sorts of things when they're surprised and feel judged. There is no way to tell from the mere presence of condoms what her intentions were. We have no idea how long they were there. Some people hardly ever clean out their stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Day_Walker Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 I will say that the situation itself sounds strange. However, if you have a belief that she is cheating on you then her carrying condoms looks rather suspicious and may be. If you do not have any belief that she is cheating, then the condoms dont have to mean anything. People seem to be focusing on the illogical nature of her excuses and while they are not logical at all, they dont really have to make sense if she really believes them. Without other indications that she is cheating I wouldnt take the situation any further than it creates doubt in your mind. This doesnt mean that she has cheated but it just puts the question in your mind and you simply need more information to know the truth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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