kevinm Posted June 22, 2009 Share Posted June 22, 2009 So I have the pack rat gene. I have this perpetual problem of being too sentimental. Part of this is my upbringing, but part of this is my ability (or lack there of) to let go. I have lots of "stuff" that reminds me of past relationships. Examples would be notes, pictures, books, clothes, the list does go on and on. I'm wondering if I should keep this stuff or just trash it. It's hard because I don't look at this stuff often, and certainly don't "use" this stuff, but these items bring back streams of emotions. I know if I throw them away I won't think about them any longer, but it's that step to put it in the trash... Arrghhh. -Kevin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hers Posted June 22, 2009 Share Posted June 22, 2009 recycle what you can. donate or sell books and magazines and clothes. that way it'll be less like "trash". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BellaDonna Posted June 22, 2009 Share Posted June 22, 2009 I would keep the pictures (and anything you may have written like a journal, etc)- but donate the clothes and books if they are not actually used. Constantly remind yourself that you have the memories and life experience forever, and that is what really counts- not the material. If throwing away the notes feels horrible to you- try on of those cliche, yet effective "lettiing go" ceremonies like burning them or tying them to a bunch of helium balloons and let them go off somewhere. You may find that purging some of this stuff actually makes you feel better in the long run. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
COtuner Posted June 22, 2009 Share Posted June 22, 2009 Timely post - I'm the same way. Although I've recently started on a massive cleaning binge for some reason and this time I've unloaded sentimental stuff. Favorite old clothes, toys, books, letters, miscellaneous "stuff".... I can't seem to stop. Some of this stuff dates back 25 years. It's like it's a drive from inside of me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onewithbooks Posted June 22, 2009 Share Posted June 22, 2009 I have a bit of the same issue. I would not say that I am a pack rat, since I do routinely like to purge. However, I held onto a lot of things from ex's past. Then I realized that is what they were, the past, and by keeping them I was chained to it. I recently burned all the letters from one of my ex's. There were literally, hundreds. I did not realize what prolific writers we were. Between cards, letters, and notes there were at least 2-300 pieces of writing. I got out the charcoal grill and lit those letters up! Make no mistake I am so over my ex its not even funny. I have been for years. I had just stuck these things back and forgot about them. I wasn't angry or upset over them. I was just over them. Ultimately my goal is to release myself of anything that belonged to the ex. Its been a long process. We were together for a few years. However, once I am done, I know that I will take a comfort in not being reminded by the past everytime I look in the back of a drawer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kevinm Posted June 22, 2009 Author Share Posted June 22, 2009 All good suggestions everyone... thanks for the input I think I'll pile up everything I'm thinking about letting go and let it sit for a week and see how I feel. Burning ceremony.. hummm. -Kevin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BellaDonna Posted June 22, 2009 Share Posted June 22, 2009 If you want some inspiration- try watching that TLC show "Clean Sweep" (I think that is what it's called.) The hosts gently force the person to purge their clutter- including sentimental items. There is a "keep" pile, a "yard sale" pile and a "trash" pile. Some of the people on the show have struggled with hanging on to too many sentimmental items. There was one mom with 3 grown kids who kept almost every last article of baby clothing, simply because her children once wore them. They made her reduce her collection to 3 baby outfits and sell the rest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hers Posted June 22, 2009 Share Posted June 22, 2009 There was also a documentary of 2 women on TLC who were pack rats. It was crazy how much stuff they had. Don't become a hoarder. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WomanWriter Posted June 25, 2009 Share Posted June 25, 2009 Keep a few select letters and pictures and throw out the rest. I saved some pics of my ex, but got rid of some of the other things he gave me that I wasn't using. I also saved his cards (there were just enough to bundle with a rubber band). When it comes to people from a long time ago, I throw stuff out little by little until I only have one or two artifacts...the most noteable things. Like from my ex before my ex fiance, I saved a few key letters and one pic of us together but got rid of everything else. I think it's fine to save a little here and a little there. Moderation is key. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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