Feeling uneasy..He wants to take it slow, I keep pushing him away I think...

[Anon333]

Okay...Brief background.....I know this isnt the best way to start any type of relationship, but I met this guy at a party drunk....I ended up staying over passed out in his bed..Didnt do anything...He drove me home the next day and said he wanted to hang out...We both planned on it, but nothing came of it....Fast forward about 8 months later, I ended up moving in a house right next door to him and we got back in touch...

 

At the same time, I suddenly had a string of boys that liked me....Including my new roommate..I didnt really know what I wanted to do or what to do so I kinda tried to feel it out and hung out with all of them.....But my neighbor is the one I ended up being intimate with and liking the most....Only he is the only one that texts me the least and wants to hang out the least. He said he is intimidated by how many guys like me, yet he does not make an effort to make plans or hang out...I am beginning to feel like I am bugging him....

 

Last night I ended up at his house late at night after the bar and made him late for work the next day.....He seemed mad and has been saying he wants to take things slow, but I feel like I am constantly texting him and pushing him to hang out, he rarely initiates hanging out or texting me....but he seems busy with a band and work...I dunno...Now I am starting to feel like I have pushed him too far..When I tell him I will just let him decide when to hang out, he insists its okay I text him and that he wantys to hang out with me...Hes just trying to be nice I guess....Im so bad at this stuff and know I am going to push him away...In the meantime my roommate wants to be with me so much more than this guy shows.....

 

I hate feeling on edge about if someone really likes me...I already slept with him, so taking it slow in that department is kinda too late....I dont know..I think I should just stop texting him and bugging him to hang out and see if he makes a move? Is it normal for me to be this way? He thinks I blow stuff way out of proportion and I think it scares him.....anyone have advice how to chillax and whether maybe I am being unfair to him.....Or is he being too distant?

[Maya_A]

It's hard to say...

 

How often are you texting him & how often are you attempting to ask to hang out?

 

Do you give him enough space/time of silence to be the one to ask you first?

 

and has been saying he wants to take things slow, but I feel like I am constantly texting him and pushing him to hang out,

 

There is one thing to look at right there. If you yourself feel that you are pushing him constantly then maybe it is time to lay low more.

 

.I think I should just stop texting him and bugging him to hang out and see if he makes a move?

 

Yes. This will tell you more about his interest level in you.

[HeartGoesOn]

Has he ever asked you out on an actual date?

[Anon333]

no. he has not asked me on a date and has not really asked to hang out. but i think im so eager to hang out maybe he doesnt have a chance. one time he texted me and i didnt respond right away and he thought i was mad at him. i dont know. i think i get too nervous and needy when i like someone. he pretty much has said chill out- i like you. but hes not showing it as much as id like and it made me sad he seemed mad at me today for interupting his sleep and making him late for work.