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Rambling


Comatose

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Rambling, asking questions ...

 

Are you there?

I just don't know,

my soul repeats this question,

I feel it reverberating

through my being

like a ticking time bomb

waiting for conclusion

waiting...

to be...

realized.

 

How can I trust?

In something

that has done to me

what you have done...

something so narcissitic

as to create

only for the wish

of praise

giving free will

only so long as that free will

be turned to you...

and yet there is no proof

that there is even a you...

at all.

 

How can I believe?

in something

that never forgives...

who creates a place

of such anguish...

as if I have not lived

enough of that...

here...

and yet I am told that you are

suppose to be filled

with undying love

as a parent

has for a

child.

 

I want to believe...

I want to trust...

I want to know...

that she is wrapped

in a loving embrace...

even if...

it is not my own...

and that one day

I will have the chance

to hold her again

in the kingdom...

I have been...

promised.

 

I want to believe...

I want to trust...

 

but I just have to keep asking...

 

Were you ever there?

 

I'll never know....

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