stephla Posted January 21, 2009 Share Posted January 21, 2009 ...about the person who you are jealous at? (i'm talking about jealousy in a love relationships.) how would you feel about a bf/gf who make you jealous? would you like/love him/her more, or would you somewhat hate him/her? it's interesting how a little jealousy on my bf's side makes him more loving and passionate. but if he gets me jealous,i immediately go completely cold towards him. (just to note,i never try to make him jealous,he does this to both of us by being insecure). this is what happened. he tried to make me jealous,never mind how. (probably wanting to test my feelings for him,or to make me want him more). but instead he got me pissed off. i lost trust in him,and started to feel angst towards him because he was disrespectful. my love feelings for him decreased. then he wanted to make it up to me,and started teasing me not to cheat on him etc. he was trying to make himself look jealous,to make me feel better. but by giving me such immature comments,he made me feel he didn't trust me for no reason, and the story goes on and on. it's like he's playing games,which is nonsense at our age and such a long relationship. i'm just tired of it all. any thoughts? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SapphireNoir10 Posted January 21, 2009 Share Posted January 21, 2009 I used to get jealous. Now I dont. I like it when my bf goes out and enjoys himself. He annoyed me when he gets jealous, yes it means he cares but also means he doesnt trust me a hundred perecent. I think its stupid to make people jealous on purpose, thats game playing. I agree with what your saying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blue69 Posted January 21, 2009 Share Posted January 21, 2009 Playing games in a relationship is just silly. Honest, open communication works so much better. Got something on your mind, curious about how someone feels? Talk about it. Dont play a game and try to figure it out based on reactions. Don't blame you for getting upset. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sindy Posted June 3, 2009 Share Posted June 3, 2009 it's interesting how a little jealousy on my bf's side makes him more loving and passionate. but if he gets me jealous,i immediately go completely cold towards him. (just to note,i never try to make him jealous,he does this to both of us by being insecure). this is what happened. he tried to make me jealous,never mind how. (probably wanting to test my feelings for him,or to make me want him more). but instead he got me pissed off. i lost trust in him,and started to feel angst towards him because he was disrespectful. my love feelings for him decreased. This is exactly how i would normally feel, so i guess it only backfires on them in the end. I cant stand this whole "testing" game thing in relationships. I also turn cold and begin to resent that person for even attempting to hurt my feelings. Thoughts of even leaving them,or becoming very distant and untrusting of them, as ive had this game played countless times before its so unbelievable, its a joke! So i understand where your coming from completely. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gryphaeon Posted June 3, 2009 Share Posted June 3, 2009 you said; "it's interesting how a little jealousy on my bf's side makes him more loving and passionate. but if he gets me jealous,i immediately go completely cold towards him. (just to note,i never try to make him jealous,he does this to both of us by being insecure)." I would like to point out here that you are allowing yourself to be the victim and giving away your power to change things... "he gets me jealous" says that he is responsible for your feelings, he is not... ultimately, it is your choice. "he does this to both of us..." says again that you have no control over what is happening, and you do have the power to control things in your life, and only in your life as long as you are willing to take responsibility for your part in it. I was a very jealous man once upon a time... until I learned that I don't have the right to "own" my partner... they aren't mine to control and if they do something that I can't trust, then I either tell them goodbye if the relationship is new or if there is a long standing commitment, I will make an effort to communicate my displeasure at their behavior and hope that they value the relationship enough to work it out. I had a very difficult time with the whole victim concept for a very long time... this isn't about blaming... this is about taking responsibility for your choices... and yes, you CHOOSE every minute of every day what, where, how and when your life is going to be what it is, regardless of "what is done to you". if you are having issues of jealousy, they are YOUR issues... stop trying to control him, it will only bring more heartache. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GoneCrazy Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 Its the WORST emotional feeling...All that goes through me is... - negative thoughts - worry - sadness - anger worst of all this shows so everywhere i go i'm like that i can try and be happy but it doesn't work i just cant fake it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DontMindMe Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 jealousy is imature and an unatractive trait in my eyes. I know we all get jealous from time to time it's human nature, but if your in a relationship you should trust eachover enough not to get jealouse. although saying this when the guy i'm seeing was shagging this girl in the back of his car when she was going out with someone else (this is before we got together) anger and indeed jealousy kicked in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unknown1607307972 Posted June 14, 2009 Share Posted June 14, 2009 Well I get distant and quiet while inside I feel like I am being stabbed. The boyfriend always notices it though and forces the truth out of me because he wants to try and make it better again. It's only really his ex I am jealous of because of their past Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jessica911 Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 he only makes me jealous when he said other girls are this and that. since he is a player so that gets me scared, but if he isn't a player than i wont care, because i know i got him for sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waveseer Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 I reject jealousy to the point where I will reject the person who is causing me to feel jealous (if I think they are doing it on purpose). Now, someone being honest about their options is a different story. When they are being generally tempted that is not about jealousy it's just realistic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angelxx1 Posted August 4, 2009 Share Posted August 4, 2009 Its been said that jealousy does not show how much we care about someone it simply shows our own insecurities. I think you have every right to be upset with him, for someone to do it on purpose is mean and uncaring. We become jealous most of the time over othr people because we are insecure within ourselves. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blitzkrieged Posted August 8, 2009 Share Posted August 8, 2009 I never really cared before but recently I get really upset. Feeling like Im getting stabbed would be a good word. I live in miami and there seems to be an unproportionate amount of girls here that are gorgeous. It doesn't help me that my guy works on the beach and is constantly seeing girls in bikinis and girls topless all the time. I don't really visit him much at work anymore because I always see him looking (not on purpose) and I wanna die, but even worse I start wanting to change how I look because in my head itll make him only look at me I know its not true but this is what I feel. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hexaemeron Posted August 10, 2009 Share Posted August 10, 2009 I don't get jealous. But when my bf gets jealous, it seriously makes me want to walk away. I hate being on the receiving end of it each and every time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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