Loki71 Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 I just told my ex I can no longer be friends with her. That was the hardest thing I have ever had to say to someone let alone the mother of my kids. I tried and tried to be friends and all it did was keep the pain and hurt going. I can't do it to myself anymore. As much as it hurts and is killing me I know it's the right thing to do. I feel as if I just yanked my heart right out of my chest and threw it on the floor. I almost wish someone would just put a bullet in my head cause I know that pain would be less. Now I have to find away to be strong for my kids and find away to move on. never thought goodbye would be so hard after everything but here I am and I wouldn;t wish this pain on anyone ever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jettison Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 I know your pain. Although I'm still in touch with my 10 year, there were times when I didn't know if that would be true. The "don't call me honey anymore... I'm not your honey" is particularly vivid in my mind. Since she's the mother of your kids though, she'll still be out there. She's not going away. In the meantime, take all the you time you need, and this could amount to years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scorpion Fury Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 It is hard to be friends when emotions run high and are up and down and all over the board. I bet you will be friends again when the dust settles. Agree. I'm sure she understands and this will probably also help her to get over any pain she's experiencing with this also. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
De Mon Fa De Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 I just told my ex I can no longer be friends with her. That was the hardest thing I have ever had to say to someone let alone the mother of my kids. I tried and tried to be friends and all it did was keep the pain and hurt going.. I am in the very same situation. It sounds like you've taken the first steps towards getting your self-respect back, and I congratulate you on finding the courage to step out into the darkness. Those first steps are the hardest part, hopefully your road will start to turn up from here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lostandhurt Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 hey buddy, I have been telling you to make things easy on yourself and it looks like you are. This really is for the best right now. Don't put any time frame or hopes that one day you might be friends with her, just leave it be and if is possible it will happen. Getting rid of all the negative in your life is a good step down your path. I just finished a book you might want to read. "How Did I Get Here" by Barbara De Angelis It isn't a great book but it has many parts to it that will get you thinking and help find clearity to your life. I know there are certain things about yourself you would like to make better and reading and learning has helped me tremendously. They don't teach this stuff in school and my family surely wasn't a great example to learn from so we must seek out the knowledge for ourselves and our loved ones. lost Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coolgirl Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 I'm in the same postion as you are and just cant seem to decide on the right thing. I dont want to be friends with my ex too but its impossible to make that happen because he see's us being BFF. I said no it dont work like that. With him being around makes it harder for me to move on and cope and with him still being around isn't making it any easier. He say's he wants to start over. I'm like start what over. told him that i'm not taking a trip back down to memory lane again. As hard as it is divorcing him what good will it be for me. And till this day I cant seem to decide on anything anymore. I dont know how long you've been married for but for me 1 year of dating, 1 year of being engaged and 3 years of being married i tell myself how can i let this all go into garbage or waste. I cant even let it go. So imagine not trying to talk to my ex. So i'm there with ya buddy i'm still going through this. ahhhhh i dont want to make a decsion. So i took the liberty and told my father to make a decsion for me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fireman Sam Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 Check out some of the short articles on this site. They were very helpful for me to get a grip on my feelings and get some perspective on how to move on. link removed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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