A letter to end it - or clear it up - advice?

[rich_1517]

I am tired and frustrated. Girl of three years, i made mistakes and have owned them to her. She left with a "two month deciding period". during that time i have done no contact then set boundaries when she called a lot and is "still deciding". I am afraid that the open endedness of this puts the whole thing on her terms, and is damaging to moving on and/or reconcilliation. She has not really gone over her reasons why.

 

She has called twice today, no message. My gut tells me its to end it (uh hem, offically) dont know.

 

in an email (i dont know if we need to meet or not, everything has been said) this is to turn a "deciding period" into more my terms.

 

"you know how i have felt and that i wanted to work this through because i believe we are worth it and i love you. But this has become very unclear and i have to start treating this as over so i can move on.

 

It also allows me to start taking care of past business with you, paying you back and returning your things. So for me im taking the pressure off of waiting for a decision.

 

I wish it had been different, i wish we had maybe fought more or made harder lines to cross over to get here. I have to ask if something happened while i was gone to make your decision so fast, or was it just too much? you can answer that or not, i was curious because you changed so much when i got home.

 

You also dont have to answer this email. I could tell you about the regrets i have and what i was willing to change but you know those. I will miss you."

 

 

I feel pretty solid about it, its just the sending im nervous about.

[neva_black_n_white]

you can answer that or not, i was curious because you changed so much when i got home.

 

You also dont have to answer this email. I could tell you about the regrets i have and what i was willing to change but you know those. I will miss you

 

i think its a pretty good idea giving her options on weather or not to respond and in some ways may entice her to. but have you thought that when you put, you wanted this more on your grounds, well this is giving her a big option where you may be left wondering. i think that you should maybe take out or adapt those lines so that its kind of asking but more of a ''i would like to know''. i think by doing this, your mind would be more at rest and the ''official'' healing process can fit in.

 

 

 

as for being nervous, i guess this is something that many people have to go through, the step where an action has to be taken. i believe that if youve got this written up, then copy it into an email. and do you know what, then its just a click of a button, i believe it would be alot of weight of your shoulders especially when your ''solid'' on the idea.

 

good luck, kel