Singlestill Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 Last weekend I was in such shock I didn't really think about things. Today though I was trying to figure out what to do tonight and I thought (perfectly normally) well what do I usually do, and it hit me . . . hard This * * * * ing sucks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beejcee Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 hi -- the first weekend i spent alone after leaving my husband was pure torture. i felt so lost and alone. i didn't know what to do with myself..... i sure did a lot of crying. it's been five months and it slowly gets a tiny bit easier each week but i will never forget that pain. you're so right.... it really does suck. i'm so sorry you have to go through heartache like this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pushforward Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 Sorry for your pain. I can empathize with how you feel. I'm not going to lie, it's going to suck for a long while. Take this time to feel your pain and acknowledge it. Spend some time alone to find yourself and if it starts to get really bad, hang out with friends and family. It's going to be hard breaking out of your normal routine and you will always feel like something is lacking. It will get better, it will take lots of time and patience. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crab62 Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 hi -- the first weekend i spent alone after leaving my husband was pure torture. i felt so lost and alone. i didn't know what to do with myself..... i sure did a lot of crying. it's been five months and it slowly gets a tiny bit easier each week but i will never forget that pain. you're so right.... it really does suck. i'm so sorry you have to go through heartache like this. ditto. it's gonna hurt, but like the rest of us, you will heal... have faith in that. it has been 9 weeks since my break-up... and i can't believe i can honestly say i am starting to heal, it's amazing and wonderful to finally feel it. please be strong and have faith in what we write.... that you are not alone, and you too will get better. HUGS to you... we are all here for you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Singlestill Posted January 10, 2009 Author Share Posted January 10, 2009 I may have to post several times today, as this is really, really hard. I thought I was doing so much better, but it was because I am taking classes, job hunting, and keeping busy during the week outside of the house. Then the weekend hit. I went to the bookstore today, but even that reminded me of her. I have been making myself do productive things today like signing up for a fitness class that starts tomorrow, starting a new book to read, and sending out more job applications (I graduate in May) but it is all being done through a tear stained prism and it feels almost pointless. My head knows it isn't, but my heart and soul are trying their best to override it. Pretty successfully I might add. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shygirl1212 Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 You are a lot stronger than you think. I can tell from your post that although you are hurting so badly, you are incredibly strong. You should be VERY proud of yourself for this. I wish I could be half as strong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Singlestill Posted January 10, 2009 Author Share Posted January 10, 2009 You are a lot stronger than you think. I can tell from your post that although you are hurting so badly, you are incredibly strong. You should be VERY proud of yourself for this. I wish I could be half as strong. My ex told me that exact same thing several times. This meant a lot to me Shy because it reminded me of a good part of the relationship, a part that made me feel special, which I haven't lately, and also reinforced that I will make it through the bad parts even though it seems like a futile fight some days. Thank you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shygirl1212 Posted January 11, 2009 Share Posted January 11, 2009 ~hugs~ Hang in there. The hope you have despite your pain gave me some hope tonight, so THANK YOU for that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Singlestill Posted January 11, 2009 Author Share Posted January 11, 2009 ~hugs~ Hang in there. The hope you have despite your pain gave me some hope tonight, so THANK YOU for that. You are welcome! I am glad we can help each other on here. It takes me out of my misery for a few when I can help someone else Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Singlestill Posted January 11, 2009 Author Share Posted January 11, 2009 I had been doing so good this past week, moving forward even when I didn't feel like it, but today I can't seem to do anything productive. Last night I kept picturing her face so clearly, I saw every pore, every beautiful little mark, and no matter what I did I couldn't get that image out of my head. Then again this morning I woke up, and saw her everywhere. I called my friends but no one has answered today, and I haven't felt like going out on my own. I know days like this will happen, but I feel like I have slid back to day one all over again. I hadn't cried for several days, but last night, and today, it seems like every tiny thing is a reminder of her, and every reminder causes tears. I want to call her so bad. To make her see that we are right for each other. That we can regain the spark she lost. I am not going to break NC but the temptation is strong today. I can't imagine a future, an hour, even minute without her, but I have to find a way somehow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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