ladybug726 Posted January 11, 2009 Share Posted January 11, 2009 First of all, stop talking to him about anything except work. Ignore any of his attempts at talking about anything else. Be polite and sweet but don't give him any extra attention. Don't talk to him about the relationship! Let it go. No more phone calls, no more listening to him boohoo about it. He sounds like a douche bag. Putting you through that BS, while he has a girlfriend? He's being disrespectful to both of you. And telling you he knows you'll be there for him when he's done with the other girl? Wow. What a loser. You need to stop feeding his ego by giving him ANY attention. Just listening to him babble on is a big no no. Oh, and he's heartless because he's very immature. Link to comment
Hannah13 Posted January 11, 2009 Author Share Posted January 11, 2009 First of all, stop talking to him about anything except work. Ignore any of his attempts at talking about anything else. Be polite and sweet but don't give him any extra attention. Don't talk to him about the relationship! Let it go. No more phone calls, no more listening to him boohoo about it. He sounds like a douche bag. Putting you through that BS, while he has a girlfriend? He's being disrespectful to both of you. And telling you he knows you'll be there for him when he's done with the other girl? Wow. What a loser. You need to stop feeding his ego by giving him ANY attention. Just listening to him babble on is a big no no. Oh, and he's heartless because he's very immature. Whenever he has said much about anything other than work, i usually say something like, "your gf must be so happy your talking to me like that" or "Thats not acceptable, stop talking like that". Im very sweet to him, but not in the 'i want you to be my bf' kind of way. I act like how i do with any other 'friend' or 'coworker'. Im friendly, but not too friendly. I am currently thinking about writing him a letter, seeing as though that seems to be the only way he listens or finds value in. My attempts at telling him to stop talking to me in any way other than at work are falling on deaf ears, and im getting fed up. Link to comment
Hannah13 Posted January 31, 2009 Author Share Posted January 31, 2009 Hi everyone! I didnt wanna make a new thread since this is still ongoing, but ive got quite a few updates : / Well for starters, he officially cheated on his gf......with me i am so ashamed of this, i resisted his attempts and advances for weeks, he has been trying to 'get with me' for a while. It did not last long and did not go too far, and after i felt horrible. Its been rough since then, he still trys to cheat on her. Im not sure what to make of him anymore. One night he called me after nc for a while, and started saying the usual i love you i miss you crap...then all of a sudden flipped on me BIG TIME!! He said horrible personal things to hurt me, and they worked. I started bawling and yelling, then all of a sudden, he said, "Why are you mad at me? WHat did i do?!" and he starts crying and whimpering saying that stuff. I was like WHAT THE HELLLLL!!! I hung up saying i had to go, and the next day we talked and i told him that i thought he was bi polar and had some mental issues, and that maybe he should look into those things with his doctor. My family and i have thought this stuff for years. Surprisingly he agreed. I hope for his sake he really goes through with it... He's still with the gf, but he still says he's effing up his life. I just keep telling him that he needs to get on with his life either way, and that i cant be there for him anymore even though he says im the only one that helps him. I feel so torn. On one hand i am in love with him still...and want to be with him and on the other hand, i feel just...sorry for him. His life is obviously going no where and im getting fed up with being used. So far ive gone very low contact...he texts me first all the time, and my pity for him gets the best of me i guess. But, i keep things very short like "oh. mhm. yea." and i never talk for more than 30 min a day now. I know this is probably bad, and i should be NC but idk. I know ive done a complete 180 and im back at square one. Its a big mess..Replies are welcome please! Link to comment
Elizzy09 Posted February 1, 2009 Share Posted February 1, 2009 Reading this makes me think of myself in many ways...i feel like we can relate. Im so sorry he is a jerk to you, and it seems like he always has been from what ive read. What you now need to realize is, he was never ever good for you. He fooled you probably more times than you realize, and staying in contact with him will continue to drag you down. He is who he is. He is now choosing a life that will never satisfy him, and we both know that. Ive seen this happen too many times to friends, and also my sister who is now out of college. It may not be now, this year, or even two years from now, but someday he'll realize what he gave up, and trust me his regret will haunt him. Sure, he's having fun now. Im sure hes partying it up and being 'real cool'....but in the end that stuff doesnt matter. Move on...grow as a person because of this, and leave him in the past. Youve done all you can. Link to comment
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