when should i try to contact her

[lostchild]

i met a girl about 4 months ago when i was dating my ex on and off and i fell in love with this new girl and things were like nothing ever before we were just great together then i messed up and ignored her a lil bit for a couple days cuz i was having some family trouble's which i couldnt avoid then when we got together again and she broke up with me ...i begged for her to give me a chance but whe wouldnt ... its been almost 2 weeks of no contact and im doing much better when do think i should try to contact her becuase i will do whatever i have to do be with her again...

[whitefang]

Did you tell her the reason for you ignoring her for a couple of days because these sort of things affect girls in different ways. Some might take it ok and others not (i guess she didn't). If you didn't explain why you ignored her then she might feel that it's something she might of done or she feels that she's not wanted. It sounds like you really like her, i think you should call her when you feel right too. If she isn't going to then you'll have to make the first move and contact her. Explain to her that you still love her and maybe discuss where it all got messed up and trying to work from there.

 

All the best .

 

- whitefang

[rich_1517]

i think you know the answer, unless you didnt explain the reason for it. if this was recent then call if you didnt fully explain it, but do it in a dignfied way "im sorry if i was out of line, the family situation overwhelmed me and i neglected you, for that i am sorry, I am sad that you no longer want to see me, but i will respect your wishes if thats what you want." and then drop it. do not press her. If you said these things or something like it then no dont contact her.

 

the ball is in her court. You have to get rid of the pain the best way you can so that when/if she calls you are more ready for it. If you have seen no contact then stick to it. If shes done then she is done and probably no amount of wooing will get her back.

 

Neediness will definitely not get her back. I hate to say it that way but i had mine recently call (a lot) and want to hang out, etc. And i blew it by saying i couldnt be "just friends" right now. I had another way i could have gone with it, which is ok i understand. swallow my hurt and move on, i ended up asking her not to call so i could heal up and move on. then in restrospect realized that i was just scared and showing i was needy.

 

The reason i tell you these things is so that you know you are talking to someone with recent experience.

 

She may call she may not. but which you do you want her to see? begging or the guy she fell for. remove your desperation by doing other things, work out, go for walks, hang out with friends, help others in worse positions than you. the point is you have to get out of your head long enough to see clearly.

 

Its ok to have hope. I try to keep hope and no hope to a minimum and just do the next thing in front of me.

 

But no i do not think you should contact her. if you havent seen "no contact" at the main forum index look it up. you seem to have but you may want to reread it.