did I go about this all wrong? Am I pushing him away or is he pushing me away?

[Anon333]

So I have a post a few posts down about early stages of dating and keeping it secret. I wrote about the guy I have been dating for a couple weeks, seeming to not invite me out to public shows/outings around people. We both kinda agreed to keep things on the DL. because I had initially started dating his friend...Tonight has been the longest we've gone without hanging out...About 3 or 4 days I think.....And tonight he told me we couldnt hang out because he was going to a show..

 

This has bothered me a bit..Because I know the friend we were trying to keep things secret from wont be there...Maybe his friends are there? Anyway....I texted him today asking if I could call when I got out of work, and he said I could call him but he'd be at the show...I texted back "nevermind, Ill talk to you tomorrow, I dont want to disturb your fun."...Anyway....He ended up just calling me now, And I kinda had a passive aggressive attitude and I think maybe I came accross stupid...He asked me if i was okay..and I said sarcastically "Im having so much fun on this Friday night..." And he didnt know what to say...

 

The thing is..In my head, I know other people (like his friend), that would have loved to have invited me and had me there...I dont know...Maybe Im totally wrong to have acted this way..But I figure if he doesnt like my attitude he can find someone else....I just want to feel like he is totally into me, and I question it with things like this...Im sure my attitude tonight was a turn off to him too..But at this point, why not just be my over sensetive self..I dont want to hide how I am to him..If he still likes me for being like that than he is more of a keeper...Is this a good strategy, or am I subconsciously pushing him away?

[ghost69]

i don't see where this guy had much interest in you to begin with. he never invites you out?

[Ammy]

I totally understand your frustration. I too would be annoyed. But being sarcastic etc won't help the situation - it will probably push him further away (I know I've been there) - it makes you come accross as if you care more than he does.

 

Instead leave it, let him get back to you and invite you out next time. If he doesn't contact you, then leave it. Then if this continues to be an issue, maybe just raise it with him in a conversation?

 

Ammy