abriellek Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 Please read, I have to vent. I've always been big but I went on Depo and I gained 80 lbs first, then went through a breakup and even though I quit depo I keep gaining weight and I weight a hundred pounds more than I did a year and a half ago. I don't know what to do and I'm scared. My Mom is really fat and so was her Mom and even though my habits aren't changing I keep gaining weight. I'm afraid I'll end up like my Mom, I'm catching up in numbers. My Doctor tells me to run instead of walk when I work out. And I feel like no one believes me when I say that I really do try to lose weight. With my weight and height an online calculator told me to maintain this current weight I must be eating something like 2800 calories a day which is ridiculous. I know I eat a lot of food but I never eat cake or sweets or stuff like that. I hardly eat processed food, everything my family eats is fresh and not frozen. I tried to cut out like 500 calories from my diet for a month and a half and I lost no weight. I drink 8 glasses of water a day. My depression is so much (even on meds) that I literally have no motivation. I hardly want to shower let alone get off the couch and I just can't seem to make myself excersise. I don't know WHAT TO DO. Guys won't date me because I am 'too fat to date.' (but not too fat to have sex with.) I'm so miserable I don't know what to do anymore. Any advice? does anyone else have these problems? any of them? what do you do? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redrose85 Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 A bunch of us are trying to lose weight/get fitter. We have threads kind of all throughout. Feel free to join in! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sparkly Eyes Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 I'm sorry that you have to go through this. unfortunately you have to get over your depression and then have a goal and try VERY HARD for it. you have to exercise, go to an expert and seek help for your work out and nutrition plan. It is going to be hard, but once you can make it, you will love yourself and see the results after a while. I like to lose weight too. but I figured I dont wanna cut of my food. why? because I have this obsession with food and not eating gives me depression. instead I decided to work out more seriously and I just started it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kuiks8 Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 what kind of medication are you on? what are the side effects? Why don't you lay out what you eat in a typical day...see where we are at... As Redrose said we have several threads going on looking at eating, exercise and just venting and helping each other stay on track... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abriellek Posted October 28, 2008 Author Share Posted October 28, 2008 I'm kind of new to here can you give me some links to some of them? I'd appreciate it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kuiks8 Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Applewhite Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 Sure! Here are some links that I like reading: Also you say you don't believe the amount of calories you consume in a day is 2800. Maybe you don't know how to count (I didn't either, but docs are usually right about there guesses in calorie intake!) Try www.fitday.com It is a food journal. It helps you figure out how much you are eating, and keeps you on track. It really helped me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purpleduckie Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 fitday is really useful to realize how much you're actually eating. start going to the gym and see a nutritionist. it's important because a lot of people dont know what to eat. it's good that you don't eat fast food or processed food, but that's only half of the battle. it works for most people, but i think you might just have a predisposition to be over weight, which makes the battle so much harder... so you have to work much harder... hang in there. lots of helpful ena'ers here to help. =) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
daintyfairy83 Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 Do you see a shrink for your depression? I'd strongly recommend that. I'm no expert but I do believe your mood and your appetite could be linked. Once you get out of your depression and gain motivation again, it will be much easier to lose weight. I heard that crash dieting is not the best way to lose weight, cuz you gain that back easily. I have a question for you though - do you eat really quickly? I have been doing some reading and observing. The skinny people I know eat really slowly. I've tried eating slowly for some time and people have commented on how much more slender I look. By slowly I mean like chewing 20 times per bite and waiting for like a few seconds between bites. You will start to realize you feel full halfway through your usual portions. Stop when you feel full, not stuffed. I have no medical research to back that up but I am a strong believer in it. Maybe you could give that a shot! Good luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 weight watchers is a great program, i highly recommend them. it's a good system of eating, i think it will help you get back on track. don't feel bad, don't beat yourself up. you've had some bad circumstances, but that doesn't mean you have to be a fat girl forever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
funkymonkey3 Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 I lost about 25 pounds by eating differently and yes working out. Starting always sucks but the inches and pounds will keep melting away if your focused. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. If you want to change then put forth the effort. You can do it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yumicecream Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 This might be a down feeling...life is full of ups and downs. Don't dwell on your weight, just focus on keeping yourself happy and busy. Change what you're dissatisfied with by getting a hobby/job you enjoy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thejigsup Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 I feel for you, but you know what? I'm a fairly big girl with tons of confidence. I love my size and my curves. I would guess I'm about 60 pounds more than I should be? You know what? I don't care! I have a great love life, in the past two weeks three guys have tried to get my number, and my bf is a handsome, successful attorney who owns his own firm. It's all in your attitude. Men don't use me for sex, I won't allow that. I have the bf all my friends want. Love yourself. If you can do that, it is darn attractive. If you can't lose weight, you can't. As long as you stay active and eat healthy, who cares? Personally, I think big is beautiful if done the right way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 well, being overweight and trying to lose weight isn't just about trying to impress guys. at 60 lbs overweight, chances are that it's affecting your health in a negative way, and that needs to get taken care of. i think health has to come first. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Applewhite Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 I feel for you, but you know what? I'm a fairly big girl with tons of confidence. I love my size and my curves. I would guess I'm about 60 pounds more than I should be? You know what? I don't care! I have a great love life, in the past two weeks three guys have tried to get my number, and my bf is a handsome, successful attorney who owns his own firm. It's all in your attitude. Men don't use me for sex, I won't allow that. I have the bf all my friends want. Love yourself. If you can do that, it is darn attractive. If you can't lose weight, you can't. As long as you stay active and eat healthy, who cares? Personally, I think big is beautiful if done the right way. I don't see how you can stay active, eat healthy and be 60 lbs overweight.... There was a term in psychology for the way you reassure yourself like this... I forget the name, but this sure sounds like it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparkles4 Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 Have you talked to your doctor about this? Gaining 100 pounds in a year and a half and being unable to lose any of it despite really trying seems kinda odd. Maybe there's something else going on with your body that's causing you to gain and keep weight, such as medications/glandular conditons/hormonal imbalances/etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparkles4 Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 I don't see how you can stay active, eat healthy and be 60 lbs overweight.... There was a term in psychology for the way you reassure yourself like this... I forget the name, but this sure sounds like it. Since when is it a psychological problem for a curvy woman to be confident and happy with the way she looks? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 i think there is nothing wrong with being confident and happy with how you look. that's great - at every size! just pointing out that it isn't healthy nor is it good for your body to carry around that kind of weight. it catches up to you. have you ever seen an obese old person? no. they die before they get old. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thejigsup Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 I don't know about this hurting my health. I'm 52-years-old, work three jobs, go to school finishing up my Masters, go out just about every night with my bf and have more energy than girls half my age! I doubt if many of you could keep my schedule up. I never stop and I feel fine! Plus, I am an Honors student. I do not have diabetes, high blood pressure, or any of that. In fact, I'm embarrassingly healthy. I understand that many overweight people are unhealthy, but I am an active, alive woman and plan to keep it that way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waveseer Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 When I first started exercising regularly I wondered if I would ever lose weight. My diet improved naturally as my body begged for food that would give me more energy. It took months before the scale started to budge. Even then it was never more than a pound a week. In a year and a half I had lost 50 lbs! People didn't recognize me any more. It was great. Then I broke my foot and was stressed out in my relationship and gained 40 of it back. Since May I've lost 25 of that 40 and have only 15 more to go! It's slow and I have to keep active. I try not to think about food too much even though I love it. If it isn't near time to eat I just think about something else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Applewhite Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 Since when is it a psychological problem for a curvy woman to be confident and happy with the way she looks? I have no problem with being confident. That really is great. Your confidence should have nothing to do with how much you weigh anyway (apparently it doesn't, and again that is great.) I didn't say you were unhealthy either. All I said was: How can someone EAT HEALTHY and be ACTIVE and and be 60 LBS overweight. It just depends on your definitions of healthy and active I guess. But with most peoples definitions (and doctors probably) that cannot be... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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