What if we never heal?

[photogo]

I have been reading a lot of these posts and feel really sad by them. My 1st thread ever>.

 

I am wondering what if we don't ever heal. What if 3/5/12/33 years from now, we see our ex and all those emotion of pain, depress, love, abandonment, memories etc surface. What if we never truly heal with time. Just bury the emotion with enough dirt.

 

My ex and I recently broke up. I stopped going on Facebook after our 2nd week of break up to not feel the hurt. After our 1st week of break up, she would call once or twice a week for two weeks. I try to keep it to a minimum and fun. I also was the 1st to say I gotta go to show her I am important. Then she stops, now we are both NC for a month or so now. I dunno why she stop.

 

Basically, I feel I won't heal ever. As long as I don't hear, see, and know anything about her I feel safe and fine. We have been dating for close to two years. I want us back though. I am really wondering what if we don't heal =[

 

I feel so sad writing this post. I am too sensitive for a guy=/ not enough testosterone hahahaha

[bbeardenton]

hey

dont worry about not healing because at some point you will. Right now it might just be easier for her to not have any contact. her way of handling the situation. I am sure there will always be a part of you that loves her because she had a deep impact on your life and during your time together she added to what makes you you. But that doesnt mean you cant move on and grow while still retaing the love and experience you once shared. i know it will take a long time but as time goes buy the initial pain, regret, and sarow will. That doesnt mean that it wont return if something sparks a memory of your time and love for each other but the pain will dimminish and you can lern and grow from the experience.

all the best and im sorry that you are going through such a tuff time

[Silvery]

People always say time will heal everything, which is true. That doesnt mean you'll forget the pain and the hurt, but you must keep in mind that those hurts happened for a reason, to make you learn and grow as a person, to help you to better yourself should the same situation ever arise again. We all heal and find closure eventually, and when we realise why the hurt happens and what have we become from it proves that the past can no longer haunts us. Healing doesnt mean you bury it and forget about it, healing means you are no longer afraid of the past.

 

So give yourself time, if the memory surface, let it surface, there's a time for mourning and a time to rejoice, its not wrong to feel pain and misery, but you must not let it hinder you to grow and mature as an individual. Dont worry too much about it, mkay?

[littlestar]

I believe there is such thing as never healing.

 

I think Ernest Hemingway is a classic example of this.

[itsthethoughtthatcounts]

I believe there is such thing as never healing.

 

I think Ernest Hemingway is a classic example of this.

 

Yeah i agree. Ernie and Agnes.

[brian123]

One step at a time, and you will.

[cat_lady]

I was wondering the same thing until I was told to read "man's search for meaning". There is absolutely nothing that life can throw at you that other's haven't dealt with and in the end use the situation as an advantage to help other people.

 

With time, absolute willpower and determination to focus on yourself, I believe you will heal and move on and hopefully be a better person. Or for some lighter reading - check out superdave's posts.

[PixelPusher]

Moving on isn't about burying your feelings. If you do that, I believe it is true that you won't ever fully heal. We all bear scars from our relationships but if you don't eventually deal with your emotions, that wound will never heal. It's painful to do so... confronting the hurt inflicted by the other person, but also your OWN responsibility, but it is necessary to do so.