Saw him today...

[abriellek]

I was having an amazing morning... we are completely estranged and I haven't seen him in months but I'm petrified to drive past his car at work... or go to where he works (a grocery store I used to go to.) Today I saw him drive past me wearing a hat I used to love when he wore and talking on his phone... I started panicking about where he was going (with his new gf?) who he was talking to... etc.... and cried for an hour.

When is it going to get better, seriously.

[CallingAllAngels]

I'm so sorry this happened to you.

 

How long have you been broken up/divorced, and how long were you together?

[Aviatormy]

It will never get better as long as you keep hiding from your fears of seeing him. You say it has been months?? Why is it taking you so long to accept the fact that it is over and it is time for you to move on?

 

You are beating yourself up over this guy who is not a part of your life anymore. It is time for you to get out and start enjoying your life.

 

As long as you are sitting there day in and day out thinking about who he is with, who he is talking to, why you broke up, all the good times that you had, feeling sorry for yourself and thinking that there is no other man that can replace him, you will have a really hard time moving on.

 

You have made the mistake of letting him control your emotions. You put him as the number 1 reason for living and now that he is gone, you feel as if you can not go on.

 

I know this seems harsh but it is the truth. Too many people get so consumed by their relationship that they end up bitter toward life and people of the opposite sex. You need to look at a relationship as an addition to your present lifestyle. All you need to do in a relationship is make time for that person rather then sacrifice ALL your time and neglect the precious time that you made for yourself before hand for your hobbies that you did prior to getting exclusive what that person.

 

As for right now, you need to wake up every morning and tell yourself that "today is going to be a good day, I am perfectly fine with being single" and then LIVE that day in that manner.

 

Find yourself again. Start doing all those things that you used to do before you met him. By the time you get another BF, you need to make sure that you do not change your daily routine for him. Once you make the decision to sacrifice EVERYTHING for a relationship, you are doomed if it does not work out.

 

I was lifting weights, going golfing, hanging out with my buddies and working before I met my fiance and I am STILL doing all of those things now. I didn't change my life around so I can be consumed by her. I just started including her into my life with most things that I do.

 

Try and relax and start telling yourself that this is not the end of the world, it is the beginning of a much healthier lifestyle.

 

 

Best of luck and I am sorry for your pain. It will go away really soon if you start to have a life outside of your ex.