thouse Posted August 4, 2008 Share Posted August 4, 2008 I am mad at me because I am impatient, but I feel like I have put so much time and effort in him that I was entitled to the relationship I wanted. Short recap we broke up last year while being broke up he got another girl pregnant. He came to me this year saying that he had made a mistake and that he loved me and wanted to be with me, but that he had to deal with her until she got her own place. Anyhow I just couldn't be patient. He was treating me really well actually he was treating me the way I always wanted him too. Anyways last Monday I broke up with him because I did not want him to get comfortable with the situation and I think I was comfortable with it because I wasn't. I really hurt him when I did it, I could see it on his face. After a few days I panicked and thought maybe I made a rush decision and tried to make things right, but it seems that he's trying to punish me now, by saying things like you told me to not call you and come over so that's what I am doing. I asked him so are you saying that we are over for good and he said no that's not what I am saying. I feel like he wants me to kiss his butt and chase him but I just won't do that. I love him, but he is in no position to treat me like this either and I won't chase him. I don't know who to be mad at me or him. I haven't heard from him in maybe 4 days and I am so sad about it. I fear I will never hear from him again. Just venting..... Link to comment
PushingDaisies Posted August 4, 2008 Share Posted August 4, 2008 How long were you broken up for? I think you should go NC...strictly NC. 4 days isnt all that long. If he wants to be with you he will come back, if not, he wont, and all your chasing wont make any difference. In fact, it will push him away more. I know its hard, but do you want to be with a guy who got another girl pregnant just after breaking up with you? It would be a red flag for me I think...Were they going out or was it a one night thing? Did they use protection? Its hard now but sooner or later you will meet a guy who will treat you right...and then the pain will be worth it Link to comment
thouse Posted August 4, 2008 Author Share Posted August 4, 2008 How long were you broken up for? I think you should go NC...strictly NC. 4 days isnt all that long. If he wants to be with you he will come back, if not, he wont, and all your chasing wont make any difference. In fact, it will push him away more. I know its hard, but do you want to be with a guy who got another girl pregnant just after breaking up with you? It would be a red flag for me I think...Were they going out or was it a one night thing? Did they use protection? Its hard now but sooner or later you will meet a guy who will treat you right...and then the pain will be worth it We had been broken up for months when this happened, and though I am hurt by it but we weren't together and I honestly don't think this was his plan. Anyhow I agree with the NC and I have been doing that, sometimes I wonder since I was the one that broke up is NC appropriate, but then again he knows I want him back because I told him I made a mistake and I was sorry so I think anything I say now is pushing him away because I am so emotional and upset. Link to comment
bellanicola003 Posted August 4, 2008 Share Posted August 4, 2008 Hey! Well...you can be mad at both of you actually. You know how I feel about the situation, you pry shouldn't have broken up with him so soon, but then again...he's now playing games. You tried to contact him and tell him how sorry you were and then he was kind of like blowing you off a bit - that's not right. Too many games aren't good, believe me, I know! Just keep up NC - I think he'll be back! Link to comment
thouse Posted August 4, 2008 Author Share Posted August 4, 2008 Hey! Well...you can be mad at both of you actually. You know how I feel about the situation, you pry shouldn't have broken up with him so soon, but then again...he's now playing games. You tried to contact him and tell him how sorry you were and then he was kind of like blowing you off a bit - that's not right. Too many games aren't good, believe me, I know! Just keep up NC - I think he'll be back! Hey Bellanicola, I know I broke up with him too soon and I have hurt him. He was being so good to me and I couldn't think of anyone but myself, he kept telling me it was a stressful situation for everyone involved. On the flipside I think he should have been a little more sympathetic to what I was feeling and maybe cut me some slack. I have been doing NC and will continue to because I don't want to push him any further, I just don't understand how he could be telling me he loved me last week and now acting like I don't exist, it just hurts... I did try to tell him I had made a mistake and he just blew me off. I hope I do hear from him again because I miss him... Link to comment
bellanicola003 Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Hey there! The truth is that we can't go back and correct our mistakes- read my new post...I'm such a DORK!!!! Anyhow though, the only thing that we can do is apologize for our mistakes and hope that we are forgiven. I mean, really, people in glass houses can not throw stones ya know? The other truth is that you know guys don't see things as we do - they are not as emotional and really can only focus on one thing a time. You know he was focused on making sure his baby had a stable place to live in. I mean, once your a parent...even if it's with someone you don't really care for or love, you still want the best for your child and want your child to have the best life possible with as little distractions as possible. That's what he was focusing on and not you, but that shouldn't have hurt you as much as it did. We are only human though...we think that the world revolves around us. It's natural and you apologized. Give him some time and see if by the end of the week he comes around...honestly, if not, I would contact him just to say HI! Don't try to talk about anything or the two of you...right now, he may just need a friend. Link to comment
thouse Posted August 5, 2008 Author Share Posted August 5, 2008 I am going to give him all the time he needs. If he doesn't make contact then I guess we won't talk because I feel like I did my part. I really was sincere in telling him how sorry I was and he acted like he couldn't be bothered. I won't set myself up for rejection again. I don't even go to my Aunt's house because I don't want to be anywhere he is, he always says we are bestfriends, but a friend would forgive a mistake I have forgiven many even this new child. So if he can't find it within hisself to forgive me then this is the way it will be. I am sure one day I will get over it. Link to comment
bellanicola003 Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 We all have to do what we have to do!!!! You know what's right deep down! I'm behind ya! Link to comment
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