Mythical_Suicide Posted July 28, 2008 Share Posted July 28, 2008 I would give him the benefit of the doubt. benefit of the doubt for what? That the picture mysteriously jumped into his phone? Right! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted July 29, 2008 Share Posted July 29, 2008 you shouldnt be going through his phone in the first place...just a bit nosey in my book my rule of thumb about snooping is that the severity of the 'sin' of snooping is judged by what she finds. if she snoops and finds nothing, it's her bad, she's in the wrong. if she snoops and finds evidence of cheating, then he's in the wrong. however, once you snoop, you have to make a decision with what to do with the newfound knowledge. so.... what are you going to do about him now....? naked photos don't sound innocent to me at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ycmanvs Posted July 29, 2008 Share Posted July 29, 2008 Sorry but i do not agree with this statement. I only do it NOW because he goes thru mine. Its something i started because he started to get nosey with me(When i had done NOTHING wrong) and looked thru my phone, so i said thats fine, ive got nothing to hide, so since you do it, ill do it to. We trade phones and do that. He was genuinely surprised he left it on there, and a bit flustered. It was just the text with the pic attatched. He did not save it. Please dont judge me when you dont know the WHOLE story. Id really appreciate that, i was just asking if it was normal for this to be hapening. nothing more. I was not talking about YOU....I was talking about THE WOMAN WHO SENT THE PHOTO, but I do find it amusing that you assumed I was talking about you. If he allows you to go through his phone, and you have an understanding that it is ok to do so, then those are your boundaries, so who am I to judge you? I was saying that the OTHER WOMAN was being inappropriate in sending an explicit photo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hannah13 Posted July 29, 2008 Author Share Posted July 29, 2008 I was not talking about YOU....I was talking about THE WOMAN WHO SENT THE PHOTO, but I do find it amusing that you assumed I was talking about you. If he allows you to go through his phone, and you have an understanding that it is ok to do so, then those are your boundaries, so who am I to judge you? I was saying that the OTHER WOMAN was being inappropriate in sending an explicit photo. terribly sorry, my mistake. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ycmanvs Posted July 29, 2008 Share Posted July 29, 2008 terribly sorry, my mistake. That is ok, I should have been more specific. So, what happened since you last posted? Are you getting along better? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hannah13 Posted July 29, 2008 Author Share Posted July 29, 2008 Yea mostly. I just dont know what to believe. He SEEMS genuine about stuff, but he could be lying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost69 Posted July 29, 2008 Share Posted July 29, 2008 i'd let this go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted July 30, 2008 Share Posted July 30, 2008 i'd let this go. ok, so if your gf were getting naked messages from some guys, you'd be totally cool with it? you wouldn't suspect that she was doing something to encourage these guys on? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted July 30, 2008 Share Posted July 30, 2008 I haven't read through the whole thread but it would be interesting to know if when you two first got together - the first few months, he sent you sexual texts, whether he seemed to be into a lot of sex talk, etc. and how you reacted to that - whether it was a turn on for you or not. Obviously, that's not an indication of cheating later, but if he is into being a bit exhibitionist, that might be consistent with someone else feeling comfortable sending him the photo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost69 Posted July 30, 2008 Share Posted July 30, 2008 ok, so if your gf were getting naked messages from some guys, you'd be totally cool with it? you wouldn't suspect that she was doing something to encourage these guys on? if her behavior is the same i wouldn't. if i asked her and she said she can't stop it but she isn't into this and isn't causing it, then i'd have to evaluate if i believe her or not. but if we were dating like 2 years and all the sudden started happening, of course i'd question it. something is up then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hannah13 Posted July 31, 2008 Author Share Posted July 31, 2008 ah well. quick update... i pressed my bf as to why she would abruptly send this...he finally said that, she was behind on something she had a deadline for, and he helped her out alot. she then sent a text to him saying "thanks for helping i hope you like" And, she has a history of being a, uh, very nice girl to many guys. any thoughts? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted July 31, 2008 Share Posted July 31, 2008 I don't know of any office setting where a co-worker would send a picture like that as "thanks". And did he tell her it was inappropriate and not to do that again? What is his plan for the future - would he help her out again? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ycmanvs Posted July 31, 2008 Share Posted July 31, 2008 If the genders were reversed, it would be considered sexual harassment. It is EXTREMELY inappropriate for her to send him such pictures. It sounds like no one is complaining though because the men of the office find it amusing.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost69 Posted July 31, 2008 Share Posted July 31, 2008 let it go. she sent it. if you find out that he asked for a pic like that, then you make that leaving him decision. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
drewciouS281 Posted July 31, 2008 Share Posted July 31, 2008 honestly if i were with someone and some chick sent me a naked pic, depending how into my relationship i was, i would tell my girl so everything is on the table and she wouldnt think i was hidding anything. this seems a tad skiddish so be on the look or just bail! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hannah13 Posted July 31, 2008 Author Share Posted July 31, 2008 Well im letting it go for now. I asked one of our mutual friends about her, and he said she's got issues with ehrself and shes extremely friendly with guys(if ya know what i mean) My guy hasnt talked to her and i guess she got the message and hasnt tried to text/talk to him since Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cody41 Posted July 31, 2008 Share Posted July 31, 2008 Hey just wanted to add that I also wouldn't blame your boyfriend.. at this point he did nothing wrong. He didn't respond to her, he didn't ask her for the pic (as far as we know)... I was just going to say it's probably some insecure female trying to flirt with your boyfriend because it will make her feel better about herself.... It's pretty sad but I know of (and WAS friends) with a type of girl that will flirt or hit on a guy especially if she knows he is taken... It's like a challenge to see if he will bite, and it's a huge compliment to an insecure female if he flirts back (or worse cheat) when he has a girlfriend... Just set some rules down and say that it is not acceptable and seeing that she crossed the line I don't think he should be allowed a close friendship with her.. Just a question, who is this girl and why does she even have your boyfriend's phone number?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NewPhillyGuy Posted August 1, 2008 Share Posted August 1, 2008 I would be suspicious. I echo what others have said - why does she has his #? I can't see a girl just randomly sending a naked pic....unless she's really messed up. Could be.... I would also wonder why he didn't delete. You need to have a face-to-face and ask him what's the deal. See how he reacts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
princess_summer_blue84 Posted August 1, 2008 Share Posted August 1, 2008 Oh Lord 1. He is so lying. 2. They probably been secertly dating 3. They done slept together But the main thing I'm wondering as well as the other posters is why didn't you ask him why he didn't delete it. Sounds like you have a player on your hands. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost69 Posted August 1, 2008 Share Posted August 1, 2008 Oh Lord 1. He is so lying. 2. They probably been secertly dating 3. They done slept together But the main thing I'm wondering as well as the other posters is why didn't you ask him why he didn't delete it. Sounds like you have a player on your hands. did you read the thread? he had it in a new message, not stored on his phone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amtjrtcet Posted August 1, 2008 Share Posted August 1, 2008 i was recently going through my bf's phone, and saw that he had received a naked picture earlier in the day from a girl he works with. I asked him why it was on there, he said he didnt ask for it. Should i be worried?? He's cheating. period. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost69 Posted August 1, 2008 Share Posted August 1, 2008 He's cheating. period. lol. poor guy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amtjrtcet Posted August 1, 2008 Share Posted August 1, 2008 lol. poor guy. You don't agree? If a guy I was seeing received naked pics of a woman he worked with, then he did something or provoked it in some way...thereforee he's cheating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hannah13 Posted August 1, 2008 Author Share Posted August 1, 2008 do you guys think i should maybe try and get in contact with her? Cause i dont believe what he's telling me. She requested me on myspace about 2 years ago, when my friend(not bf) worked with her at a food joint...so i could essentially just shoot her a msg? idk. its kinda starting to get at me again Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost69 Posted August 1, 2008 Share Posted August 1, 2008 You don't agree? If a guy I was seeing received naked pics of a woman he worked with, then he did something or provoked it in some way...thereforee he's cheating. i could see that. but what if this girl had his number this whole time, found out he had a gf, wanted him or didn't want him, and knew this would cause conflict? this stuff does happen. some chicks are psycho like that. if his behavior is still the same and he seems loyal, explains what is going on, why couldn't you trust that? of course it's questionable. i'll give you that. but you can't stop the world outside of you from happening. there is no solid proof he did anything wrong. he just received a message. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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