Hannah13 Posted July 26, 2008 Share Posted July 26, 2008 i was recently going through my bf's phone, and saw that he had received a naked picture earlier in the day from a girl he works with. I asked him why it was on there, he said he didnt ask for it. Should i be worried?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karvala Posted July 26, 2008 Share Posted July 26, 2008 i was recently going through my bf's phone, and saw that he had received a naked picture earlier in the day from a girl he works with. I asked him why it was on there, he said he didnt ask for it. Should i be worried?? Well without getting into the issue of why you're going through your bf's phone, should you be worried? Yes. He may not have asked for it, but assuming that this message had been received and read by him (i.e. he wasn't surprised that it was there), he also didn't delete it, which suggests it wasn't entirely unwelcome. It doesn't mean anything is going on, of course, but it does mean you can't entirely trust him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SapphireNoir10 Posted July 26, 2008 Share Posted July 26, 2008 Oh dear.. 1. HEs lying, hes flirting with her, possibly leading towards an affair and he got caught out 2. She sent it after they flirted a bit, maybe she thought more of it than him Biggest question, why didnt he delete it? 'I didnt ask for it' Isnt good enough Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hannah13 Posted July 26, 2008 Author Share Posted July 26, 2008 i always go through his phone, only because he goes through mine. His last gf about 2 yrs ago cheated on him, so hes suspicious of all girls. I dont mind, IVE got nothing to hide. Apparently neither does he Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jelina Posted July 26, 2008 Share Posted July 26, 2008 Why does this girl have his number? She obviously feels comfortable with him if she can send him naked pics to him. I agree he didn't delete it so he probably liked it. He said he didn't ask for it, he was probably lying, either way, what if she suggested it and he didn't say no, that's still bad. I think you should watch out for this guy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karvala Posted July 26, 2008 Share Posted July 26, 2008 i always go through his phone, only because he goes through mine. His last gf about 2 yrs ago cheated on him, so hes suspicious of all girls. I dont mind, IVE got nothing to hide. Apparently neither does he After he's deleted suspicious items, sure. Seems he missed one this time.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bellanicola003 Posted July 26, 2008 Share Posted July 26, 2008 Yikes...I would be suspicious as well. I mean, in my opinion, he certainly shouldn't be getting naked picture texts from another girl. It doesn't necessarily mean there is anything going on...for example, I work with this guy who's from my town and was one of my mothers students years ago, plus I know his wife only as an acquintance. One day nonchalontly (sp?) he asked if he could have my number. I gave it to him - Not thinking of anything. He started texting me to just say hello, etc. No big deal - the guy is married. I actually got some really funny and cool forwards from him! Well...unexpectantly one day about 2 months ago, he starts texting me after work saying that he needs to talk. I said ok...he writes that things aren't going well with his wife and that he's in love with me!!!! Now I HARDLY even talk to the guy!!!! His texts were random - about once a month to just say whats up! I thought no big deal because I know he and his wife. Anyhow, I ask him if he's joking...I mean he HAS to be and he says no and did he scare me away!? I'm thinking this guy is a psycho. I tell him that sometimes things happen in relationships but that i'm sure they will work things out between he and his wife, but that I'm 3 months preggers (this was at the time) with my bf's baby! He became so apologetic and said he was only joking. The bottom line though is that I almost forgot to delete the texts from my phone. Although I did...what if I hadn't? If my bf would have seen that, he would have gone balistic and thought * * * but he would want to know why I kept it even though I may have forgotten about it. Truth is that I deleted even my msg's back to the guy in case my bf ever looked - not likely he would, but still it's better to be safe then sorry. My point is that I didn't do anything wrong, but it could have looked that way. I've also received texts of naked people from my friends that I forgot to delete that he had seen and was like * * * ? I told them to please stop sending them to me because I really didn't like the pics in the first place - not my forte' (sp?) and because I didn't want my bf to question anything about my devotion to him. If you have a solid relationship with your man and know that he wouldn't do anything to hurt you, then you should believe him, but still be cautious and be extra careful. If you don't believe him, then get the hell out because maybe there really is something going on there! Just my take! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iakasot Posted July 26, 2008 Share Posted July 26, 2008 I am appalled that so many people here are judging this guy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 that sounds pretty suspicious to me. i wonder why a 'coworker' would randomly send naked photos out of the blue....? wonder if there is something going on there. do you trust your bf? this issue aside....? i don't know, something smells really fishy here.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RaceTheDream Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 Who would send a naked picture of themselves to another person without knowing whether or not the other person would be ok with it? There must be something going on between them that made this girl feel your boyfriend would be cool with a naked picture of her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unabashed Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 A naked picture of a co-worker would upset me, too. But, I would feel more upset if he had deleted the picture or acted uncomfortable when I brought up the subject. At least he doesn't feel compelled to hide the text from you. He doesn't seem to feel that he has anything to hide. I would probably talk to him about how it came to be that she sent this to him. "I didn't ask for it," isn't good enough. It wasn't random. She needs to understand that this isn't acceptable, and if he's unwilling to set that limit, then I'd feel that the relationship is over. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iakasot Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 I would give him the benefit of the doubt. Lack of trust creates contempt and ruins relationships. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hannah13 Posted July 27, 2008 Author Share Posted July 27, 2008 thanks guys. She knows about me...he and i have been dating for about 2 years, though it seems NONE of the girls except for about 2 that he knows, respect that. They all try to flirt and 'get him'. But, that being said, i dont know if hes 'asking for it' (i.e. flirting, being too friendly, not sticking up for me as his gf by saying please dont do/say that at times...) So i dont know. Im still sorting thru it. And yes, i have MANY reasons not to trust him, but i dont really like to talk about that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JeckyllNHyde Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 i dunno. it depends what type of guy he is to be honest. you do have some decent guys who just have crazy women throwing themselves at them. if i where to find it on a guys phone, and so far he was totally commited and trustworthy i wouldn't jump to conclusions. if he is the type to flirt, and hide stuff, be worried. did he say why he didn't delete it? i'm just saying.. this could be bad news, but if he is a trustworthy guy, you need to go with your gut. edit.. ok. so just read the last response. you have "many reasons not to trust him." my opinion: he's busted. lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lady00 Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 I would be worried too. As far as girls throwing themselves at him, I'd imagine he could nip that in the bud by acting uninterested or telling them their behavior is not appropriate. With the naked picture woman--he simply said he did not ask for it? What did he say he planned to do about it to stop her from sending those sorts of messages in the future? Has he told her firmly it's not appropriate--if he has not, the "I didn't ask for it" excuse is lame. It's not good enough not to ask for it--he needs to respond firmly to women who do this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 And yes, i have MANY reasons not to trust him, but i dont really like to talk about that. like what? i know you don't like to talk about it, but it's at the heart of the matter. no one sends me naked texts. sigh. i would never send one of myself either to a coworker, or even a bf for that matter. if i were to do that, i would guess it would be someone i am flirting with, and more than just 'casual' flirting. that's why i'm suspicious. of course, your bf may have some bunny-boiling stalker and he can't control what she sends him, in which case, he needs to go to the police. but since you say you have many reasons not to trust him, maybe go with that.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karvala Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 no one sends me naked texts. sigh. Well give me your number, and I'll see what I can do. j/k!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hannah13 Posted July 27, 2008 Author Share Posted July 27, 2008 He claims he is one of those people who cant tell if a girl is interested, which he kind of is to an extent. BUT, girls who send him texts like that, or say things like, "i missed you so much while you were at home sick We had a convo about that last night, and i told him that he is just gunna have to say "look your being pushy and i have a gf" or something like that. If it doesnt stop, im getting involved. I know i cant be there to make his decisions for him, but clearly he isnt doing ANYTHING about these girls, and i think thats getting to be his reputation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 i dated a guy like that for a while. he turned out to be a real jerk. he realized it years after that losing me was a big mistake. c'mon. anyone with 2 brains cells to rub together can tell that nude photos and saucy text messages = I WANT YOU. if he doesn't know, you should dump him anyways for being dumb. you don't want to have dumb babies one day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lady00 Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 He claims he is one of those people who cant tell if a girl is interested, which he kind of is to an extent. BUT, girls who send him texts like that, or say things like, "i missed you so much while you were at home sick I'm sure he knows. He's just playing dumb. Doesn't really sound like a winner if you have so many reasons not to trust him AND he acts like he's clueless about when women are throwing themselves at him. It would be easy for him to put an end to it if he wanted to. It seems he at least likes the attention if he's not encouraging it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jelina Posted July 28, 2008 Share Posted July 28, 2008 I don't think it matters that most of the girls don't care whether or not he is in a relationship. Your not in a relationship with them so no matter what they won't care. However, your boyfriend doesn't seem trustworthy, and he obviously doesn't care about you, which means that you should leave him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fastball2113 Posted July 28, 2008 Share Posted July 28, 2008 you shouldnt be going through his phone in the first place...just a bit nosey in my book Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost69 Posted July 28, 2008 Share Posted July 28, 2008 well, he still allowed you to go through his phone with it on there. did he save the pic or was just the text there with the pic attached? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ycmanvs Posted July 28, 2008 Share Posted July 28, 2008 It says more about her than about him. It is inappropriate behavior on her part. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hannah13 Posted July 28, 2008 Author Share Posted July 28, 2008 It says more about her than about him. It is inappropriate behavior on her part. Sorry but i do not agree with this statement. I only do it NOW because he goes thru mine. Its something i started because he started to get nosey with me(When i had done NOTHING wrong) and looked thru my phone, so i said thats fine, ive got nothing to hide, so since you do it, ill do it to. We trade phones and do that. He was genuinely surprised he left it on there, and a bit flustered. It was just the text with the pic attatched. He did not save it. Please dont judge me when you dont know the WHOLE story. Id really appreciate that, i was just asking if it was normal for this to be hapening. nothing more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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