What would you do if...

[independantgal]

One day you had a blazing argument with someone you shared a connection with, he got angry and reacted irrationally...on his myspace (status and mood) wrote displaying to the world 'F**k You' with mood as vexed etc.

 

and also sent you abusive messages on myspace saying that 'I really hope you grow up' etc. I was distraught...my friend had to make me see the situation clearly.

 

(The argument was about me telling him my feelings, then things escalated i can't really remember. Saying that I need space from him if we can't be together to get my head straight etc. and he flew off the handle. When I got home after seeing him I then saw all the stuff he had done on his myspace.)

 

Well....months later....he has just sent me a message 'hey, how are you?'

 

I probobly know the answer to this but...what should I do? Part of me wants to reply to see what he wants...or to see if he will apologise but the other part...thinks DON'T!

[DLtoken]

Every situation is different, and it's all up to you. He sure did sound immature by the way you described you past argument. If you do reply, be cautious and don't make yourself vulnerable.

[vwright]

I don't like the way he reacted to you, no one should ever talk to the one they care about like that--no matter how mad you are it is unecessary to insult your girlfriend/boyfriend...you could respond to see what he has to say, but keep it short and simple.

[DatingIsSoHard]

I used to know this girl from chat all those years and she regularly emotionally blackmailed me (i.e.: I want to log off from msn after I think I spent too many hours there and she'd say I don't love her or don't care about her etc...) but when after 7 years I met her in real life she acted like she never really loved me and was just curious to meet.

 

My diagnosis: Let him bugger off

[D_Lish]

Exact same happened to me. Got chatting to a guy online, we got along brilliantly, yeah there was a connection...then we'd had this little tiff and I stopped speaking to him. Then suddenly he changed his username, I won't repeat what he'd put, but it was a direct insult to me and he began sending me messages totally full of insults and abuse...and I was totally SHOCKED!!

 

Next thing and a few days later, he'd send me messages saying "lets chat soon, i miss you"...almost like nothing had happened.

 

I sure don't want to be friends with a "crazy"...why should you?

[CandyKins]

What I would do? I wouldn't want to have anything else to do with him to be quite frank. I could never continue being with someone if they treated me like that - poorly and most disrespectful.

 

I think if you reply and act like what he did never happen, then he would just get away from that and may continue. Perhaps you could give him another chance (as I believe everyone deserves a second chance) but make it really clear and be firm that he must never talk to you like that. If you do this he will respect you and it's a strong move - along with you being strong.

[independantgal]

Thanks for the advice guys

 

I've just replyed with a 'What do you want (his name).'

 

Will be interesting to see if he replies. I think this way, I'll be able to see what his intentions were of sending me the message, and then decide whether i want to reply to it or not.

 

If I'm honest though...I don't really intend on carrying on speaking to him. Just hoping for an apology.