Lowconfidence Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 As I said before, if your problem is with the appearance of certain features common to blacks or Arabs then a statement like "I won't date blacks or Arabs" is going too far since their are doubtlessly countless Arabs or blacks that don't have the physical features that some may believe are universal. To assume that all people of a race share these physical characterisitcs is absolutely racist. If instead of something about there appearance turning you off, its in regard to culture, then this too is racism since you're assuming all blacks or arabs are affiliated with a certain culture or religion which is by no means the case. You are so Politically Correct it sickens my stomach! Some people don't want to date my race. You know what? It doesn't bother me at all! I'm not attracted to certain types of races but it doesn't mean I think they all look the same. What if I'm not atttracted to darker skin? Am I automatically racist? Are you saying it's okay to not date people of different religions? Is okay to be religionist? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clarity Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 I know where Superfreak is coming from, the problem is all in the wording, we've been over this a million times. I'll restate my take on it: "I'm generally not attracted to people of race X", this is PREFERENCE "I will never, ever date people of race X, even the ones I have not met or seen", this is RACISM There is is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lowconfidence Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 Superfreak, are you black? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clarity Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 Are you saying it's okay to not date people of different religions? Is okay to be religionist? Just to nip this in the bud, you can't compare the two, religion is a choice a person makes, race is not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leon Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 Hmm... I've been hit on by more than one race. I usually don't have a problem with this, because I can generally tell if someone has a mentality about race. But even still, someone can like a person of a different race and be too much of a coward and care too much about what others will think. I had a friend in college who I use to do things with, and we would get an occasional stare every once in a while, it was very uncomfortable at times. I mean even though we were not dating we were naturally attracted towards each other and displayed it at times which didn't make things any better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Superfreak Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 You are so Politically Correct it sickens my stomach! Some people don't want to date my race. You know what? It doesn't bother me at all! I'm not attracted to certain types of races but it doesn't mean I think they all look the same. If they don't then why the broad sweeping generalizations? What if I'm not atttracted to darker skin? Am I automatically racist? No it means you're less attracted to darker skin, but why go further and generalize that you refuse to date black people? And since you do, why get offended for saying that this is a racially discriminatory dating preference? Are you saying it's okay to not date people of different religions? Is okay to be religionist? In my opinion absolutely. I wouldn't date someone overly religious. I wouldn't date a committed muslim etc. But I don't mind being labelled "anti-religion" in my dating preference. You on the other hand are extremely resistant to calling ruling out people based on race "racism". I'm honest about what my dating preferences say about me, others are not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Superfreak Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 Superfreak, are you black? No, I'm not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lowconfidence Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 I'm not attracted to Black women because of the skin colour. If that makes me a racist I guess it does. But that wouldn't stop me from being friends with black women nor do I have any hatred towards black people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lowconfidence Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 No, I'm not. Then you must be one of those white males who OVERCOMPENSATES by calling everyone racist. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Superfreak Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 I'm not attracted to Black women because of the skin colour. If that makes me a racist I guess it does. But that wouldn't stop me from being friends with black women nor do I have any hatred towards black people. Absolutely. I think alot of people see racism as a binary condition where it's either you're racist or you aren't. Really it's a spectrum, it's just a question of "how racist are you?" the same as "how sexist are you?" Probably everybody is a little bit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lowconfidence Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 Absolutely. I think alot of people see racism as a binary condition where it's either you're racist or you aren't. Really it's a spectrum, it's just a question of "how racist are you?" the same as "how sexist are you?" Probably everybody is a little bit. If all you care about is the wording then everyone has a bit of racism inside. Even YOU. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Superfreak Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 Then you must be one of those white males who OVERCOMPENSATES by calling everyone racist. I'm not white either....gosh this over-stereotyping really isn't helping your case man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lowconfidence Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 I'm not white either....gosh this over-stereotyping really isn't helping your case man. What case? All I see is some overzealous guy bent on being Politically Correct. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poloplayer Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 All I see is some overzealous guy bent on being Politically Correct. I actually see an excellent attorney in him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pianoguy Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 I guess this is the way I'm looking at this argument: If somebody were to say "I won't date a black guy because he is black" that would probably be racist. If it were something like, "I won't date a black guy because I prefer the type of physical features that Caucasian people have" I would call that preference. It's a tricky issue, because what we are attracted to is influenced to some extent by society. For example, in the middle ages, being overweight was considered d*** sexy, whereas nowadays fat people are on the bottom of the dating ladder. Likewise, is attraction to blond people something innate or something our society foists on us? I think it is a mixture of both. Certainly our society is obsessed with blond, which could be lingering racism since the majority of blond people are white (out of personal curiosity- does anybody know if blonds occur in any races besides Whites and Hispanics?). On the other hand, I did read a study that said there may be a genetic preconditioning for attraction to blondeness, especially in Caucasians. The reasoning had to do with the idea that we find childlike features to be beautiful- for example, almost everyone is attracted to oversized eyes, smooth skin, and long full lashes, which are "childlike" features; the idea is that blondness is also a "childlike" feature since many babies are blond at birth. Here's a link to an article about the evolution of the blond gene: link removed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JadedStar Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 At the end of the day even if a person likes blondes more because of media influence it still doesn't make them prejudice to say "i prefer to date blondes and not someone of a race other than white". Regardless of WHERE the influence came from, that person STILL has that innate attraction to themselves that they cannot readily identify. It is personal to them. We ALL have influences in our lives that affect who we are attracted to whether those influences be our upbringing, the media, or friends, etc. That influence helps mold the thinking but at the end of the day the preferences are still individual. You can't get away from outside influence no matter what the topic or who you are talking to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clarity Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 From personal experience (nothing scientific), I tend to believe that the attraction to blondes is a more cultural (western?) thing for Caucasians than anything else. For non-Caucasian guys (myself included), if I were to informally survey my friends, I'm sure I'd find the overwhelming preference to be for brunettes over blondes (when comparing hair colour of Caucasian women). That's why it always puzzled me (living in a western society) how blondes are referred to as something supposedly superior looks-wise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Superfreak Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 \ Likewise, is attraction to blond people something innate or something our society foists on us? I think it is a mixture of both. Certainly our society is obsessed with blond, which could be lingering racism since the majority of blond people are white (out of personal curiosity- does anybody know if blonds occur in any races besides Whites and Hispanics?). I believe some scaterred tribes in Africa though I'm not certain. Although yes, it's certainly not at all the norm. On the other hand, I did read a study that said there may be a genetic preconditioning for attraction to blondeness, especially in Caucasians. The reasoning had to do with the idea that we find childlike features to be beautiful- for example, almost everyone is attracted to oversized eyes, smooth skin, and long full lashes, which are "childlike" features; the idea is that blondness is also a "childlike" feature since many babies are blond at birth. I read that study too. What it did was seek out mechanisms for why we may prefer the things we do. In Western culture, blonde hair is associated with youth, however in another culture, isolated from Western culture, other traits may better inform youth. So it's not so much a genetically determined preference as it is our biology seeking out youthful partners, and our culture informing us that blondeness is associated with youth which can in turn lead to a preference for blondes. At least that's the gist I got from reading the study. I think evolutionary biology research sometimes goes too far in its conclusions though, it's still a relatively young branch of science. Here's a link to an article about the evolution of the blond gene: link removed That kind of reminds me of the peacocking theory Pick Up Artists use. The idea being one must stand out to get noticed, which is exactly what blonde hair does naturally. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kinetics Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 I'd like to believe that race does not play a role, but I'm more inclined to believe that it does...at least where I live. I am Asian by apperance, but I have a Western background, I have friends from different countries. When I hang out though, the Asian girls always end up hooking with my Caucasian friends. It's really funny because we all start out with a good conversation, and I notice that the topic starts shifting to the other guys, and less of me. Sometimes its worse because the Asian girl only speaks Japanese or Chinese, and I can speak those languages fluent enough. You'd think there's more connection there, so I converse with them for a while but they eventually ignore me, and start talking to the American guy in broken English. I'm like, maaan, what's up with that? So I dunno...either I'm a really boring person, or those friends of mine have some super attractive quality that even breaks the language barrier. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shudder Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 It could be that you are boring, or it could be the fact that these girls you're with are 'conditioned' into thinking white people are better. This is actually more common that I thought, not just over here but even in Asia as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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