spion_kop Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 Chris, during the time when you two were/are apart, was she ever single? If not, then I would be very careful as to what she wants. You and her may both believe in what she is saying but she is only saying these things out of a lot of emotions like 1) frustration of a failed relationship 2) looking for comfort 3) confusion in the direction in her life and many others. In this situation, people need to be single, especially after being together for a long period of time like you two were. Many people suggest that we should go out and start dating etc etc. While im not against that, I myself wouldnt approve of it. After a breakup, both the dumper and the dumpee need to be single for a while before they start dating. This is so they can be independent and discover themselves first. After that you discover who you want to be with. So in her case, if you really have to ask yourself what you want to do. Because you may be a rebound for the rebound and you dont want to get hurt all over again. Advocate being strict friends if anything. The reason i'm saying this is because you're one of us on here and I just want what's best for you. Take care. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
riley123 Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 Hey Chris, Wow! You're a living, breathing example of WHAT to do during a breakup! Well done. I agree with the others -- take things slow. Don't immediately reconcile -- she needs to earn your trust and love back. Keep all of updated on your situation. Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gee Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 Good for you chris...good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chrisanderson Posted July 24, 2008 Author Share Posted July 24, 2008 Thanks for all of the well wishes guys! Yea, I'm definitely not rushing into anything. She hasn't been single at all so I told her that we won't be "official" until she gets her mind clear. We definitely have a long road ahead of us Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chrisanderson Posted July 24, 2008 Author Share Posted July 24, 2008 Oh one more thing... I was truly over her. I could care less either way. I actually stopped thinking about her and my situation with her. And that just so happens to be the exact same time that she's begging me for a second chance. The old adage came true... "they come back when you stop thinking of them." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rgm1266 Posted July 24, 2008 Share Posted July 24, 2008 Chris, Sorry for your pain. Hang in there and remember this pain is temporary. I've been there and I survived!! I'm kind of currently going thru a breakup/time apart/whatever you want to call it. I agree with alot of the people on here. Please for your own benefit, follow the NC rule. I'm not going to lie, it's not going to be easy. But down the road, you'll thank yourself for not contacting her. If it's meant to be then she'll come back. Hang in there!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
riley123 Posted July 24, 2008 Share Posted July 24, 2008 Chris, Sorry for your pain. Hang in there and remember this pain is temporary. I've been there and I survived!! I'm kind of currently going thru a breakup/time apart/whatever you want to call it. I agree with alot of the people on here. Please for your own benefit, follow the NC rule. I'm not going to lie, it's not going to be easy. But down the road, you'll thank yourself for not contacting her. If it's meant to be then she'll come back. Hang in there!!! Ha-ha, rgm1266 -- you need to read the whole thread -- she wants him back! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
afguy84 Posted October 13, 2008 Share Posted October 13, 2008 Hang in there man, I am in the same boat. My fiancee of 6 months (we dated for 5 years) and I broke it off about 3 months ago after she cheated on me for the second time. I am in the Air Force and she had gone to Mexico and had a "Revelation of Ideas" when she decided she wasn't really ready for marriage. I begged for her not to stay the night at a guys house she had known for 5 weeks and she didn't care what I said. Sure enough, she cheated on me the night she was there. So I just remind myself whenever I find the urge to call her that she was willing to throw away something we had been building for 5 years with the idea of being together forever for some stupid honeymoon feeling she had had for 5 weeks. Keep the faith man...it sucks but everything happens for a reason. Oh wait I just realized she came crawling back...glad to see you moved on...later. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chrisanderson Posted October 13, 2008 Author Share Posted October 13, 2008 Yup, she came crawling back but it didn't last long Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hurtintough Posted November 6, 2008 Share Posted November 6, 2008 Same thing happened to me and I let her go and be with the other person.Over a year later she wants to be with me again and I don't want to go back now! It was so hard to get over her I could not do this again with her.I am glad that the pain does eventually subside. Thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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