Did I let him win again?

[oxturtlelovefbxo]

Trust is what I believe is the foundation of a relationship. You have to have that.. Especially in a relationship that will be going on for 2 years on chrismas eve.. Thats where i stand. It will be 2 years on xmas eve that we have been going out. I love him so much.. Like nothing else in this world. Like a long time ago.. He cheated on me.. He told me he was high and thats why he kissed this other girl.. considering it was in the beginning of the relationship.. i still went out with him... But under some circumstances - that he wouldnt do any drugs ever again.. well as time goes on he still smoked weed... and lied behind my back.. i knew it was going on and i caught him a few times... but he always promised me he wouldnt again.. well about 2 weeks ago.. something i never wanted to believe what happened. I found out he went to another girls house with another girl and was on bars.. He told me he was at his house with his friend playing video games.. i even called him up during the night and he assured me he was in his room. Well he really wasnt.. and it really broke my heart.. my mind told me to break up with him but my heart didnt.. i know hes still doing things behind my back.. i think he is taking advantage of me.. i dont know... am i doing something wrong? Did i let him win again?

 

I shortened the story out.. so people wouldnt get to scared of a really long post so u guys can replay.. thanks

[enadevoli]

you did not do something wrong, you can't blame yourself for the way your guy acts. he is a jerk. i know you love him & you probably have a good reason for it, but look at what he is doing to you. he's not worth all the pain you are going through. lying to you & cheating on you. thats like the worst thing someone can do to you in a relationship. like you, i believe that trust is a huge part of any relationship, its so important because it just makes you feel good to know you can trust someone. you don't deserve what he is doing to you, no one does. can you honestly trust this guy?? i know i wouldnt' be able to. you gave him his second chance & he blew it. i suggest you have a serious talk with this boy because he is not treating you right. honestly, if a guy can go out & do things with other girls, then he really doesn't love you as much as he says he does. & if he does it again, then he just doesn't care about your feelings & he doesn't care about the two of you in this relationship . i know its hard to hear it, & im sorry, but this guy is causing you pain that you don't deserve & he's not worthy of your heart or your tears.

[oxturtlelovefbxo]

I wanted to break up with him and all... But I just thought about my life with out him.. and i dunno i stayed with him.. im so mad at myself now.. like.. our anniversary is coming up.. i dont know if i should wait till after the holidays and our anniversary.. or just do it now... help!