ghost69 Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 well, next time just tell them 'look i really don't appreciate you asking me these questions and trying to get to know me.' then see what happens. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ConfusedDater Posted May 27, 2008 Author Share Posted May 27, 2008 well, next time just tell them 'look i really don't appreciate you asking me these questions and trying to get to know me.' then see what happens. So what if a girl asked you if u like your job and u say no and then she says-"well what are you doing now to get another job? You wouldn't be irritated? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost69 Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 So what if a girl asked you if u like your job and u say no and then she says-"well what are you doing now to get another job? You wouldn't be irritated? no. it's general conversation. you are going to look like an idiot if you get steamed over this. if someone asks you a question you aren't comfortable with, don't answer it. simple as that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImThatGirl Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 My Steps to a Girl getting a reply from me 1.The Photo 2. The Profile If the photo is not pleasant looking I won't reply. If she gives off a negative vibe in your profile I won't respond. Who reads the profile first without seeing if they are attracted?? So. do you reply if it's only a headshot? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 So. do you reply if it's only a headshot? Yes because I'm only concerned about the face not the body Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImThatGirl Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 I don't know... I see so many contradictions ConfusedDater... Example: You mentioned that one girl wanted a whole body shot of you. (and that bothered you) What's the difference in you insisting on having at least a face shot? You said you want a girl that can be herself. You can't tell who a girl is by talking to her a few times - chatting a few times. Does it make you feel better to pick other people apart? Like maybe you do that to them before they have a chance to do that to you? I'm not trying to come accross as rude here but I do think you really need to get to the root of your problem. Being so nitpicky will get you nowhere with dating. We all have preferences. For some of us looks are much important / others looks are slightly important. Some people like to talk "goals and life plans" early on and are equally goal oriented and some of us are just laid back and go with the flow. I can't remember how old you are? Just curious.... What else do you do besides focus on finding the "perfect, unflawed girl?" (Again, I'm not attempting to be rude... just wondering.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 When I'm not working I'm hunting for that right girl until it's time for me to go to sleep Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImThatGirl Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 When I'm not working I'm hunting for that right girl until it's time for me to go to sleep How old are you? Why do you choose to only answer select questions? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 How old are you? Why do you choose to only answer select questions? 32 and I'm not sure what you meant by the full length body pic question Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImThatGirl Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 Another one for ya - - - What are your hobbies? Besides hunting for that right girl? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 Another one for ya - - - What are your hobbies? Besides hunting for that right girl? Watching Sports Collecting Old TV shows Reading Hanging with Friends Listening to Jazz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImThatGirl Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 The other question was "Do I have any full length body pictures" See I'm starting to learn that when it comes to most women, it's never enough for them to be satisfied. It wasn't enough hat I have a nice clear pic of my face from the chest up? Now my body structure has to be analyzed? This is part of that example. You just seem so entirely fussy about dating. That probably comes accross as well. I wouldn't date someone that is so fussy. You expect others to be themselves but you have all these requirements. I also seen where notepad questions were mentioned. I feel like you probably have a notepad and check stuff off. o She has a sweet voice. (5 seconds in) o She laughed. (at 31 seconds into the convo.) o She seems genuine so far (at 42 seconds into the convo.) o She asked me about my hobbies. Check o She asked me about my future. BIG FAT X - - - Note to self - forget all the above. That's just what you make me think of when you fuss about the little imperfections or unique pieces of who you are meeting. Does that make sense? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImThatGirl Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 Watching Sports Collecting Old TV shows Reading Hanging with Friends Listening to Jazz How much time do you spend on these hobbies? Why is so much time spent on finding a girl? One of the things I consider as important when thinking of dating is that the people I meet have their own hobbies, etc. Of course I'd like to spend time with that person but they have to be confident and independent as well. They can't come accross as making me their everything or me being the piece that completely completes their life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 This is part of that example. You just seem so entirely fussy about dating. That probably comes accross as well. I wouldn't date someone that is so fussy. You expect others to be themselves but you have all these requirements. I also seen where notepad questions were mentioned. I feel like you probably have a notepad and check stuff off. o She has a sweet voice. (5 seconds in) o She laughed. (at 31 seconds into the convo.) o She seems genuine so far (at 42 seconds into the convo.) o She asked me about my hobbies. Check o She asked me about my future. BIG FAT X - - - Note to self - forget all the above. That's just what you make me think of when you fuss about the little imperfections or unique pieces of who you are meeting. Does that make sense? Well I have a first convo coming up in about 30 min and I will see how this goes. When someone calls me for the first I try to make it seem like it is our 2nd convo so they can relax and open up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImThatGirl Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 How do you do that? Again just interested in knowing. Often, when I talk to someone for the first time whether on the phone, email, in person, the person just naturally feels at ease after I talk to them for a few. I am just myself though, I don't try to coach them into feeling comfy. Or anything other than themself.? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 How much time do you spend on these hobbies? Why is so much time spent on finding a girl? One of the things I consider as important when thinking of dating is that the people I meet have their own hobbies, etc. Of course I'd like to spend time with that person but they have to be confident and independent as well. They can't come accross as making me their everything or me being the piece that completely completes their life. Well I can do 3 things at the same time. Like tonight I will watch the game and talk on the phone to the girl. And I spend a lot of time hunting for the right girl because I turn 33 in 3 weeks and have no time to waste Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 Well I can do 3 things at the same time. Like tonight I will watch the game and talk on the phone to the girl. And I spend a lot of time hunting for the right girl because I turn 33 in 3 weeks and have no time to waste i think you should spend some more time getting to know each girl. since you are looking for someone who is confident enough to be herself, take a few weeks to get to know what she is like, instead of dismissing her for some superficial characteristic. be open to getting to know women a bit deeper before deciding she isn't the right one for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 How do you do that? Again just interested in knowing. Often, when I talk to someone for the first time whether on the phone, email, in person, the person just naturally feels at ease after I talk to them for a few. I am just myself though, I don't try to coach them into feeling comfy. Or anything other than themself.? I will crack a joke in the first 2 min and then she and I wil laugh. Or I will say-"Your statement in your profile had me laughing so hard" That usually works Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImThatGirl Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 You make me confused. Because again - - you are picky about phone conversations. To be 100% honest, I'd be fussy if I had a scheduled time to talk to someone for the first time and they were watching the game at the same time. I'd deal without complaining about it but I'd wonder how interested the person is. If you put so much focus on finding a girl because you have no time to waste, there's too much pressure on making sure the girl is perfect (because you seem to be looking for a wife rather than someone to actually get to know well.) What are you going to do if a girl passes all your tests in the beginning but then seems to be different 6 weeks down the road? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImThatGirl Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 I will crack a joke in the first 2 min and then she and I wil laugh. Or I will say-"Your statement in your profile had me laughing so hard" That usually works YOU ARE SCRIPTED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ???????? (lol) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 You make me confused. Because again - - you are picky about phone conversations. To be 100% honest, I'd be fussy if I had a scheduled time to talk to someone for the first time and they were watching the game at the same time. I'd deal without complaining about it but I'd wonder how interested the person is. If you put so much focus on finding a girl because you have no time to waste, there's too much pressure on making sure the girl is perfect (because you seem to be looking for a wife rather than someone to actually get to know well.) What are you going to do if a girl passes all your tests in the beginning but then seems to be different 6 weeks down the road? First of all, the volume to the game will be down and she won't know I'm watching the game. I will be watching the SCORE more than the game so I can focus on the conversation Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 YOU ARE SCRIPTED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ???????? (lol) BUT IT DOESN"T SOUND SCRIPTED!!!-lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImThatGirl Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 It sounds scripted to me... just relax a little more about the whole conversation thing. Don't rush to judgement! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mun Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 Well CD, I can honestly say that you have kept me entertained for the last 20 pages, you and everyone else that has replied to you. Thanks for making my evening brighter I agree with the poster that recommends you keep the conversations light, short and sweet. No need to talk for hours if you will be going out and meeting face to face. Guess what? if you talk for a long time you will inevitably run out of things to say and say what comes to mind... like... what are your long term goals ?--- when she probably doesn't care all that much yet.. or if she does and gets one look at you and doesn't think you are right her her she will stop caring---so it really doesn't matter at this point. Problem is, I think, she struck a nerve with that one. but hey that is for you to work out..... I'll give you some advice based on what I have seen with online chatting, texting and dating. Until you are sure this is something you will want to persue take it for what it is... entertainment. Try your best not to get too personal or serious on the phone and not before meeting face to face. Plan a date as soon as you can and use the phone mainly to schedule dates. .... The last guy I talked to online, after seeing my picture, asked me to take a sexy one. Said it would make him happy. Will I be talking to him again? No... but at least he didn't ask me where I saw my career in 5 years then I'd really be offended.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
servedcold Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 I'll give you some advice based on what I have seen with online chatting, texting and dating. Until you are sure this is something you will want to persue take it for what it is... entertainment. Try your best not to get too personal or serious on the phone and not before meeting face to face. Plan a date as soon as you can and use the phone mainly to schedule dates. Great way of looking at it; these early stages should be much more fun and entertaining than we let them be. .... The last guy I talked to online, after seeing my picture, asked me to take a sexy one. Said it would make him happy. Will I be talking to him again? No... but at least he didn't ask me where I saw my career in 5 years then I'd really be offended.... There is some correlation between a man asking a woman he doesn't know for a more provocative picture and a woman asking a man she doesn't know for a more detailed description of his career plans, yes? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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