greywolf Posted May 12, 2008 Share Posted May 12, 2008 My ex and I talked briefly this morning and she told me she thinks she might be depressed again. I kind of don't know how to feel about this. There's a part of me that's really concerned about her and wants to support her and be there her during this time like how I did before, because I really do care about her and I don't like seeing her like this. I was trying to think of a way to word this without sounding like a jerk, but I think I'm going to sound like one anyways, so here goes.... Another part of me thinks, why should I be there for her through this when we aren't even together? But saying something like that bothers me because it makes it sound like I was there for her the first time because I wanted something in return, which I like to think isn't true. I like to think that I did it because I cared about her and loved her. And then there was even the feeling of relief when I thought, "Well I don't have to go through that again." And even worse the thought of, "Oh my god! Is she going to be depressed for the rest of her life??? Run away now.... far away....." But in all fairness, she hasn't asked me for support or anything, and I'm hoping that this is just a short phase she's going through. Maybe she's just taking the breakup rather badly. But I still do want her to be ok Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted May 12, 2008 Share Posted May 12, 2008 "Might be depressed" isn't the same thing as "is depressed." Sounds like more manipulation to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wizard71 Posted May 12, 2008 Share Posted May 12, 2008 She may be just having early feelings that she recognises from the last time, hence the might. i am always pleased when the dumpee doesnt want the dumper to suffer just for revengeful purposes. DN may well be right. Its so hard to judge without knowing a person. What do you really think if you are honest? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted May 12, 2008 Author Share Posted May 12, 2008 She may be just having early feelings that she recognises from the last time, hence the might. i am always pleased when the dumpee doesnt want the dumper to suffer just for revengeful purposes. DN may well be right. Its so hard to judge without knowing a person. What do you really think if you are honest? Honestly, I really would never believe that she would make it up just to manipulate me. On the other hand, telling me about it could be a little manipulative but I don't think she'd do it on purpose. Maybe subconsciously she is trying to manipulate me. But lately I don't try to figure out what she is thinking, because I have come to realize that I will never make any sense of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keyman Posted May 12, 2008 Share Posted May 12, 2008 It does have a smattering of manipulation in it. You were there last time, come back come back! Look after me, spend time with me, it will be alright! Don't do it. It sounds bad but it's not your problem anymore. She needs to deal with it on her own or with her own support group. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted May 12, 2008 Author Share Posted May 12, 2008 It does have a smattering of manipulation in it. You were there last time, come back come back! Look after me, spend time with me, it will be alright! Don't do it. It sounds bad but it's not your problem anymore. She needs to deal with it on her own or with her own support group. Well, I don't think I could go through it again even if I wanted to. In fact, I don't even know how I went through it last time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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