Demonblade Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 My GF and I have gotten back together 4 times in the past 6 months (this being the fourth). She broke up with the first time because she felt guilty for using me. Two months later she called me up and told me the REAL reason she broke up with me. When I told her I forgave her, she asked why. I told her that it was because I didn't have to ask her about it, that she came out and told me on her own. The other two times she had broken up with me to get with someone else, 1-3 weeks after we started dating again. She told me her reason for this was because she doesn't want a committed relationship. It's been a month since we last broke up and we just got back together last week. I complained to her that we don't last longer than a week and she said that she isn't going to break up with me again because I treat her so well (she says). Then she asks if she could go ahead and give this one girl a chance (my GF is bi, btw) AND date me at the same time. I said alright because I wanted to test her. She is basically chasing after her right now. She says and seems to be putting me before her. She does satisfy some of my needs, but not enough to keep me happy. If I talk to her about this she'll think I'm trying to pressure her into committing. The only thing that she does that is remotely intimate is that she holds onto me while we're together. We don't talk. Whenever she calls me it is because she wants me to get something for her or, if she wants to "talk, she just sit there talking to the TV. She often makes fun of me (usually making gay jokes), it doesn't matter who is nearby. I have mentioned this to her and she says that I need to learn take a joke. I just think we're better off being (close) friends. There is this other girl I've had my eye on for the past few weeks. She is a couple years younger than I am, but I can tell that she likes me. She is always looking directly at me, smiling and making eye contact when walking by me and a few times I've "caught" her check me out. She would be looking directly at me (smiling and making eye contact), then she would look me down quickly and continue eye contact. I've been talking to her a bit and can tell that she is more mature than the two and shows much more interest. The thing is, I hate hurting people and (even if I don't) I will feel guilty about it. But that is the only thing that is keeping me from breaking up with her. Should I break up and get with the other girl? How do I do this and soften it so it doesn't hurt her much? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redhearts Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 Your 18, well depends on the state I guess, but jail bait under 18. Anywho dump your current girl, shes just using you until she can find someone shes really into. Your like her back up basically. She messed around with some guy, then you took her back, now shes at it AGAIN! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iwantittoend Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 I made the mistake of dating a girl 3 separate times myself. Each time, she said she had changed, but they all ended the same way. She was just an immature girl using me because she knew just the right ways to make me fall for her again. This girl has broken up with you 4 times to go out with other people. What makes you think she won't do it again? From what you posted, it doesn't sound like she's changed at all. She's already pursuing someone else with you around. She's using you as a backup plan. It doesn't even sound like you're happy. Get rid of her now before she screws you over again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demonblade Posted May 8, 2008 Author Share Posted May 8, 2008 I live in South Carolina. It isn't illegal to DATE someone under 16 (age of consent here is 16). She is 15. Besides, I'm not going to until I'm sure. It wasn't 4 times. 1st break up: She broke up because she felt guilty for using me 2nd & 3rd break up: She broke up with me to go out with someone else, neither lasted longer than a week What makes me feel guilty is that she THINKS I'm happy. Also, won't I basically be doing the same thing she is? So how do I break up with her? She is a great friend and I have fun with her. So how do I do this without ruining our friendship? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JadedStar Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 Break up with your g/f because it isn't working out and your heart isn't in it, not for this other girl who is too young for you anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demonblade Posted May 8, 2008 Author Share Posted May 8, 2008 I don't care about age difference, 3 years isn't much anyway. I think the only reason it seems that way is because I'm 18 and she is 15. But no one would be saying she is too young if I were 28 and she were 25. I just want to know how to go about breaking up with her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NoPainNoGain Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 Ditch her,your young .Meet as many girls as you can .Dont get caught up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redhearts Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 15 and 18 is different from 25 and 28. A girl at 15 is immature and hasn't experienced anything yet, well most things, isn't quite ready to be in a long term relationship and is still figuring herself out. A woman at 25 has had some experiences, has had prior relationships and is more common sense to date someone no matter the age as you get older because they are more mature and know what they want. So I guess if your looking to mess around, just have fun, then I guess try younger. If you want a relationship or something to end up serious, go with your age. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redhearts Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 Oh how do you break it off with your current girl? Put it this way, you either ex's or nothing. I highly doubt she want to be friends with you after a break up. A good way to end it is saying I really don't think this going anywhere. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demonblade Posted May 9, 2008 Author Share Posted May 9, 2008 15 and 18 is different from 25 and 28. A girl at 15 is immature and hasn't experienced anything yet, well most things, isn't quite ready to be in a long term relationship and is still figuring herself out. A woman at 25 has had some experiences, has had prior relationships and is more common sense to date someone no matter the age as you get older because they are more mature and know what they want. So I guess if your looking to mess around, just have fun, then I guess try younger. If you want a relationship or something to end up serious, go with your age. I sent her a text (I got her number yesterday) asking how her day went and she sent me text saying that it went well. Then apologized and said that she and her BF of 6 months had broken up a few days ago but settled the argument last night and are back together again. I'm looking for an actual relationship. Nothing starting out serious, but grows into something serious in time. how do you break it off with your current girl? Put it this way, you either ex's or nothing. I highly doubt she want to be friends with you after a break up. A good way to end it is saying I really don't think this going anywhere. She's friends with all of her exes except a couple. Her belief is why refuse friendship with someone you broke up with if the two know each other well. The times we weren't BF/GF, we were just close friends. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redhearts Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 Thats a bad pattern to have your exs, all your exs, hanging around. That is just leading to trouble or not fully letting go. Thats just my opinion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rob1984 Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 You sound somewhat indecisive and young-minded given your age, nonetheless, the best option is to let your current gf go. Seek out other females and inform her you wish to see other people too. You should not feel guilty for breaking up with her, since shes done it to you on several occasions. These things happen in life, take some risks, its not going to be the end for you. If you really like that 15yr and you think she's not too young to be in relationship, then so be it, go after her, dont let your guilt ruin that "what if" possibility. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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