Iceman26 Posted April 29, 2008 Share Posted April 29, 2008 maybe what you guys call rigid, i would call self-respect in not having sex with a guy you haven't known a very long time. Yeah, you could factor self respect in there, and if I had gone a date with a girl that had explained it that way, I would have respected it and continued to date her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
george237 Posted April 29, 2008 Share Posted April 29, 2008 I find that when I sleep with a girl after very few dates I only stick around for another 3 or 4 times at it. Only one girl made me wait about 2 months and she was my only longterm relationship and I proposed to her. I respect them more if they wait, however I am a guy and that is all I am looking for in the first couple of dates. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catwalk Posted April 29, 2008 Share Posted April 29, 2008 I've read & heard the same thing, that typical dating now has people sleeping together between date 3-7, so, sounds like you were just right! Also, you do whatever you feel is right with that person. Could be first date, could be 80th! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kitkat1215 Posted April 29, 2008 Share Posted April 29, 2008 do you think that casual dating/sex actually works...like, if you meet a guy and go home with him that night...then get some drinks and go home with him again...and both parties are on the rebound...think it is possible to keep it casual, but kind of personal (like going out on occasion or being able to call each other) at the same time? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost69 Posted April 29, 2008 Share Posted April 29, 2008 do you think that casual dating/sex actually works...like, if you meet a guy and go home with him that night...then get some drinks and go home with him again...and both parties are on the rebound...think it is possible to keep it casual, but kind of personal (like going out on occasion or being able to call each other) at the same time? not if they are on rebound. then it's not casual dating. it's just sex. if it's understood by both though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kitkat1215 Posted April 29, 2008 Share Posted April 29, 2008 i know that was not a good response to op....OP, I think that 3 or 4 dates is pretty normal. I mean, I am a college student, and i feel like that is pretty much how it works in University life. I slept with my ex of 4 years on our 2nd date and it was fun. Was the sex awkward or was it pretty natural and fun? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kitkat1215 Posted April 29, 2008 Share Posted April 29, 2008 not if they are on rebound. then it's not casual dating. it's just sex. if it's understood by both though. see. that's what i would have thought...except that there was a 2nd time...and we go out...or watch a movie. I have had "just sex" but it is usually one night and there is no fluff Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost69 Posted April 29, 2008 Share Posted April 29, 2008 see. that's what i would have thought...except that there was a 2nd time...and we go out...or watch a movie. I have had "just sex" but it is usually one night and there is no fluff going to a movie is not just friends with benefits. otherwise, you'd just go over, bang and leave. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NewPhillyGuy Posted April 29, 2008 Share Posted April 29, 2008 I've read & heard the same thing, that typical dating now has people sleeping together between date 3-7, so, sounds like you were just right! Also, you do whatever you feel is right with that person. Could be first date, could be 80th! I'm at date 6 right now, and am dying here for some action jackson! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pinkelephant Posted April 29, 2008 Share Posted April 29, 2008 if you sleep with them early on, it won't change the dynamic unless the rest of your behavior changes. although, they WILL think you do this with all the guys you date. and really, if you sleep with guys on 3rd or 4th dates.. what is your number by now? honestly, if that was how i do it, i'd be up there in the 30s. If a guy acts a certain way with me early on, i'm going to assume that he does this with all the ladies he goes out with. so, same standard he'd judge me with as well. holding off isn't a bad idea, if you aren't into casual sex. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crazyaboutdogs Posted April 30, 2008 Share Posted April 30, 2008 I think that it depends on the people involved. Some people have had sex within the first couple of dates and the relationships just fizzled because it was only based on lust..once the deed is done, there is not enough of an emotional connection to build the rest of the relationship. On the other hand, there have been successful couples who have had sex very early on. I agree with Pinkelephant that if two people are comfortable having sex so quickly then chances are that is the pattern they have with most relationships...so you have to wonder just how many people they slept with if only a few dates is enough for them to do the deed. How many sexual relationships did they test out before one actually clicked emotionally as well. It would be like going to the grocery store and manhandling a dozen apples to find just one that suits your fancey. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted April 30, 2008 Share Posted April 30, 2008 do you think that casual dating/sex actually works...like, if you meet a guy and go home with him that night...then get some drinks and go home with him again...and both parties are on the rebound...think it is possible to keep it casual, but kind of personal (like going out on occasion or being able to call each other) at the same time? A friend of mine is in that exact situation right now - been three weeks - seems like a "talk" might be in order but I think the talk (initiated by her) will just confirm that he wants to keep it casual sex. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whiplash Girl Child Posted April 30, 2008 Share Posted April 30, 2008 It all depends on the guy and the girl, both separately, and how they are when they are together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kitkat1215 Posted April 30, 2008 Share Posted April 30, 2008 A friend of mine is in that exact situation right now - been three weeks - seems like a "talk" might be in order but I think the talk (initiated by her) will just confirm that he wants to keep it casual sex. yeh, I think it's not really worth it. I deleted his number from my phone. If he wants to call, I'm not opposed to hanging out, but I think it is going to have to be hanging out without the hooking up next time. I think that casual sex is only good for those with high self esteems...and mine is not. Otherwise you just end up feeling bad...or, eventually, expecting more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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