nickbroken Posted April 28, 2008 Share Posted April 28, 2008 Ok many of you know my story, know what I have been through and like you and have been suffering just like the rest of you. Well this weekend was really a breakthrough for me. For the first time since the break up I just went out with some of my closest friends that I've known since 5th grade and a few others. I went to a bar/brewery With my two best friend Jay, and Steve. Also was Steve's older brothers, a friend of Steve named Yoko who was very pretty, and I brought my friend Shannon that I have known for 12 years. So I didn't know what to expect and almost didn't go because I just wasn't feeling up to it, but I figured what the hell....it turned out to be the best thing I have done in a long time...I sat with friends as they drank, I don't drink. We all laughed spent the night watching my friend Jay try to hit on women to fail, talked about everything from relationships to spirituality to what bands sucked. The entire time I spent with them I really didn't think about my ex, didn't talk about it much and just had a good time, we didn't get in until 6 am or so. The next day Shannon and I went over to my friend Steve's to watch the draft, we were there till 3 am or so also before we came back and passed out for the night. Today I have been alone finally an able to think on things and consider a lot....being out friend my friends this weekend helped so much....because I was surrounded with people that had love for me....I want to tell you all now to IMMERSE your soul in love. I know it's easy to think this is the end of the world and that there is no hope...I know how you all feel, but I swear to you there is always hope, as long as we can breathe and think there is hope for our futures. I know a lot of you are really having a hard time right now....thinking on your ex's and picturing them in all their glory like some kind of Greek God/Goddess Yeah...lastnight when I was Shannon and Steve we talked about my ex some, and I talked about some of the things she did...one time she got really mad at me, and had every right....but she just started punching me and beating me and doing everything in her power to hurt me physically. My ex is the last person in the world you want to fight with about anything, it never goes well and always ends really critically. A lot of times she would be mad at me about something and I wouldn't know what, she wouldn't communicate it, if it was late and I said let's go to bed she would be like I can't sleep. So I would try to talk to her she wouldn't want to...I would just go to bed....and hour later she would be standing there with the light on staring at me until I got up, just to argue with me...we did that a lot....and a lot of other crazy stuff.... Now don't get me wrong I am not perfect and did bad things also, I am sure she could tell you plenty that would make you want to smack me...but the point is I think for the first time in my heart I sat and realized that damn....I do not want her back....I can never go back to that...you will come to this point also...you will continue to move forward to the light of this world....and you will look back at yourself in time and think wow...I was a mess....and for what?...There is nothing wrong with grieving...there is nothing wrong with feeling bad....but I want to tell you all this and it is with nothing but love...get out of your asses!Get out and do something!Every one of you is a big beautiful light, you shouldn't hide your beauty from the world...this world isn't a bright without you....don't let your ex's win....don't let that hate and negativity and sorrow snuff out that light...because that would truly make me sad. I want everyone of you to look in the mirror...and tell yourself 5 things good about you!...Ok I will help you guys with a few of them. !1.Litgirl, you are an amazing woman and have so much love to give everyone in this world one day a man will be truly blessed to have you in their lives. 2.Eyesontheprize, You are my friend, you are a strong man...a kind and loving man, accepting and understanding...you truly love...you are willing to work on yourself and give yourself to others...you are a better man then I. 3.Barelyalive, Wherever you are, you are an artistic and passionate soul, I want you to build from your expierence...you will make something in the world that lights up the sky and makes your ex realize his mistake one day...but you won't even be looking back. 4. Taz, you are the man you are positive and a hell of a person, you have so much going for you and you are such a great balance and positive influence for the rest of the people on the board. 5.Brokenhearded87, Hon you are not the crazy ex...you just love someone and don't know what to do, so you are panicking...you will heal from this...you will realize and learn so much about yourself...so much you didn't see....and you will be happy for this you will be happy you went through the flames and allowed them to touch you, making your soul glow and be even more radiant then before.... 6. The rest of you....I could sit here and tell everyone of you great, but that would be one monster list....everyone of you is special...not one of you are broken....or unlovable....or anything negative you might be thinking about yourselves....we will get through this together...so I tell you spend time with your friends and family....move forward don't dwell on the past and don't fear the future....embrace this holy gift while you can, because one day you won't be here anymore...and the world truly be a much less enjoyable place without any of you....anyways never mind I' m tired 5 hours of sleep in two days... I just leave you with this, immerse your souls in love....it's all that matters....in the end we are all the same....how much money you make, how much you party....how much you own...none of this matters....all that matters are your friends, family...and the love you have.....never forget that.... Nick....haha too tired.... 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EyesOnThePrize Posted April 28, 2008 Share Posted April 28, 2008 Wow...thanks for that, Nick. That means more to mean that I can probably explain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hitmehard Posted April 28, 2008 Share Posted April 28, 2008 It was wonderful to hear that it is possible to reach the point you're at now. I know you gave me hope. It was so very nice of you to make people feel good about themselves. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nickbroken Posted April 28, 2008 Author Share Posted April 28, 2008 All of us will make it, and I want you to all have hope, what is life without it? And Eyes I meant ever word of it, I only hope that when I fall inlove again and if I get married I can love my wife as much as you do, your wife has truly lost out on someone better great and your love for her is pure, you can know you gave her that and nothing can ever take that away. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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