callittheblues Posted April 19, 2008 Share Posted April 19, 2008 I text my ex today after 11 days of NC and prior to that there had only been one email and one conversation to each other in over two weeks. We have been broken up now for about 7 weeks. We have been together for over 4 and a half years! Have I made a mistake sending this text. I sent it a couple of hours ago and still havent heard back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scared and alone Posted April 19, 2008 Share Posted April 19, 2008 call me stupid, but what does NC mean? O.O Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stella Sleepwalks Posted April 19, 2008 Share Posted April 19, 2008 I text my ex today after 11 days of NC and prior to that there had only been one email and one conversation to each other in over two weeks. We have been broken up now for about 7 weeks. We have been together for over 4 and a half years! Have I made a mistake sending this text. I sent it a couple of hours ago and still havent heard back. Consider it a blip. Switch your phone off and put it in a draw. Out of sight out of mind. By Monday you will have forgotten you sent it. NC means No Contact. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brill Posted April 19, 2008 Share Posted April 19, 2008 try not to think abou the outcome if your directive was to get response most assuredly you will be let down. if you just wanted to say what you said then perhaps thats ok. But try not to dwell on it.. It will tear you up. Blessings B~ Oh it means NO CONTACT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scared and alone Posted April 19, 2008 Share Posted April 19, 2008 Thank you! lol. I've just never heard that cut down before! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AronSchneider Posted April 19, 2008 Share Posted April 19, 2008 I text my ex today after 11 days of NC and prior to that there had only been one email and one conversation to each other in over two weeks. We have been broken up now for about 7 weeks. We have been together for over 4 and a half years! Have I made a mistake sending this text. I sent it a couple of hours ago and still havent heard back. I did the same thing, I contacted my ex after 11 days after she dumped me and two days later I call her. I thought I was cool about it but I got just more desperate to have her back. The reason why I called her was because I wanted some action. But instead of action it turned out bad and she didn’t want to meet me, or well she said that we could “talk” later. So I went NC and I have been NC for almost one month. My ex also dumped me after a five years relationship 35 days ago. But I have planned to get her back with information from here and ten other websites and everybody tells me the same thing. This maybe can help you? My plan is simple. My ex broke with me because she fell out of love for me. That is very tuff! My plan is as follows: Step 1 Stay NC for 30 days Step 2: Contact your ex and set up a short meeting. Not more then 30 minutes. Be very light hearted and happy and try to put up a big smile. Talk about how much fun you had, “I was out on this party last weekend” Or I have “I took this course” or something that she don’t expect you to do. She will be like “Oh, good for you have this flat voice, but don’t she is not interesting. She just plays a game with you. But don’t stay to long what you have done, just mention something that you have done this and that. Just let it in the conversation. Like you were on a first date with a lady you like. Don’t put any pressures on her. The conversation most be very light. If she was on party, don’t ask her a bunch of questions about it. Just say, nice and let her talk about if she wants if not you say “I was on party last week, the some weeks ago or whatever” and say some fun stuff about that. This is a warning! Don’t be too nice, just be friendly and polite. You don’t ask your first time date 50 questions so don’t ask her 50 questions. Talk also about the future, like what you will do after the summer and during the summer. What you don’t want to do is talk about the past. If she brings up the relationship, just listen. If she come with all this clichés just listen. What you don’t want her to do is to bring up the relationship! Not now! That is why you most take action to talk about light stuff when you first see her after that light huge you most give her. After 30 minutes, put your cell wake up call or something like that. Just to make sure when to go. Let stuff hanging in the air! Just say, I’m in a hurry because I will meet up with a friend and that you are going out and do something fun. She will likely say “Which friend?” My ex will! I will say a friend from School and what we will do and then I will huge her lightly and rush. What will this trigger? She will wonder what friend you are going to meet! Is it another girl? She will also find it little strange that you are happy, out going and little nice to her even after you broke her heart. Step 3 weeks later you call her. If she calls you, well, say that you have much to do and you will call her later. Then after two weeks you have another short meeting. Just play it like you played it before. She knows you! This time you can go more deep. You can hang out with her like 1-2 hours. Does something fun, like playing pool, bowling or whatever? Just something that creates a subject of conversation. You should be little flirty. After that you tell her that you most rush away. Is it a night, well you have something “fun” to do tomorrow. Just let things hang in the air. Step 4: Go NC until she calls you. If she doesn’t call you then wait 1 month and then you start over from the beginning or move on with your life. I will do the second one. Step 5: She calls you. Now you can hang out maybe a day or something. This when you hope she will go “romantic” on you, why not combine this with alcohol. That is a puller! This is when you want to make your move. If you see that she shows any interest in you then good if not go NC. Your mission here is to have sex with her, if you get the chance and that’s it and you are ten minutes to be back together. But remember, she most be the one that says that she want you not you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
david_01 Posted April 19, 2008 Share Posted April 19, 2008 That was basically what ive been doing. The glitch being that i contacted her after the 30 days and as she was working didnt answer my call. She then texts me saying she'd missed my call so we had a very brief text conversation where I asked when a good time to call would be and she was so busy being away with work she said she'll let me know. I'm leaving it there for now. Point being that somehow in our heads we'll make that call and the other person will be there and we'll have a great chat a laugh and then we'll organise to meet. Be prepared for a different kind of reality like mine where we never got to speak at all and had to text because of other outside influences getting in the way. I just have to hope that she calls me so we can finally have "that chat"!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pumpkinmoon Posted April 19, 2008 Share Posted April 19, 2008 Dogdylan, Seems like a good plan but what if the ex wont agree to meet? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mock Chop Posted April 19, 2008 Share Posted April 19, 2008 I don't think it's a good plan at all. It's calculated, for sure, but good? Especially the bit about combining it with alcohol because it's a 'puller'. Yup, that'll work. Ply her with booze and she won't be able to resist....... Mind you, the mission is to have sex. Who says romance is dead, eh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tazthecat Posted April 19, 2008 Share Posted April 19, 2008 I text my ex today after 11 days of NC and prior to that there had only been one email and one conversation to each other in over two weeks. We have been broken up now for about 7 weeks. We have been together for over 4 and a half years! Have I made a mistake sending this text. I sent it a couple of hours ago and still havent heard back. Ummm, well what did your text say? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AronSchneider Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 Well, you need to have a good cause to call her. I have my cloths and I want them back! If this * * * * * say no, well I call the cops.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AronSchneider Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 I don't think it's a good plan at all. It's calculated, for sure, but good? Especially the bit about combining it with alcohol because it's a 'puller'. Yup, that'll work. Ply her with booze and she won't be able to resist....... Mind you, the mission is to have sex. Who says romance is dead, eh? Its about to get the * * * * * back, not have her staying forever. If it will get my ex to have sex with me because of alcohol. It will work fine. If I stay NC any longer she will soon have a new boyfriend and then it will be trouble. Why not go for the "object" instead of waiting? This is a war, and I will use every means necessary to get her back. If I lose every compassion in my heart, so be it! Its war, get it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AronSchneider Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 I don't think it's a good plan at all. It's calculated, for sure, but good? Especially the bit about combining it with alcohol because it's a 'puller'. Yup, that'll work. Ply her with booze and she won't be able to resist....... Mind you, the mission is to have sex. Who says romance is dead, eh? Romance is allways dead if a girl dump you.....Its about love and alcohol is the fire work!!!! If you want a girl, get her drunk and you will get your things with her. women are trash..remember that.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
postscript Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 dogdylan why do you think getting her drunk and getting in her pants will make her love you? Take it slower! If my ex called me up and I realised not long after meeting up, that his intentions were to take me to bed, I'd probably throw my drink in his face! The goal is to have me in his life, not to use me! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mock Chop Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 Well, I'm sure she'll just be foaming at the mouth with the anticipation of getting into your pants when she cottons on that she's 'trash' in your opinion. After all, what woman could resist such charm, sophistication and maturity? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AronSchneider Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 Why do I say women are trash? Well, they are and so are men. It’s about me trying to see her as an object, and then it’s easier for me to get her back. Do I have any reason to call her trash? She treated me like dirt in 6 months, and then she goes to Asia for backpacking and stop calling me so I get worried. The reason why was because she was unfaithful and planned to dump me when she returned. She did dump me, on the phone, by the way. Even when she dumped me she came with lies and clichés, even when I told her that I was cool with the break up and it was okay she lied to me. This girl is so angry with me that she said no when I called her three weeks ago to get my stuff back. She was angry because I had logged in to her Hotmail account. But it was I that told her about that, the reason why I logged in to her account was because I got some information that she had cheated on me and that was of course very true. Five years relationship, 4,5 of those years was terrific! Why I will use alcohol is because it’s a good way to make people funny and out going. The reason why I will try to get her to bed is because of one reason. Sex is a very emotional thing for girls so why not use it? As I said! It’s a war! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CatsMeeoow Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 It sounds like you're out for revenge. That's not an attractive quality I would ever look for in getting back together or starting with someone new. When you act that way it's easy to see why she did what she did. Revenge never works. Most times you still end up feeling like crap. I think you need to rethink your game plan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
browneyedgirl36 Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 It sounds like you're out for revenge. That's not an attractive quality I would ever look for in getting back together or starting with someone new. When you act that way it's easy to see why she did what she did. Revenge never works. Most times you still end up feeling like crap. I think you need to rethink your game plan. I agree, Cats. When I read his "plan" I just sat here shaking my head. First of all, DD, even if your *plan* manages to get her into bed with you, it's highly unlikely that having sex with you, drunk, will make her fall in love with you again. She could very well end up sobering up and saying "Uh....oh....wow....well....that was a mistake. It can't happen again." Secondly, while you claim that you just want to have sex with her, and your posts about her seem to be leaning toward revenge, it is clear that you are extremely hurt right now and would do just about anything to get her back in your life. This being the clase, you really, really need to stay NC for a loooooooooong time. Thirty days isn't enough. She can mail your clothes back to you. You seem concerned that she'll move on to someone else, but maybe she already has. But, even if she hasn't, there's no guarantee she'll want to reconcile. I've said it many times before, and I'll say it again: "Plans" and "schemes" to get an ex back rarely work, and even if they do, it is generally only temporary, largely because the ex has been manipulated into reconciling, and because whatever broke the couple up to begin with has not been fixed, and both parties haven't healed. If there's any chance of getting an ex back, it's in moving on with your life. This doesn't mean never talking to her again; at some point, you can have light contact (LC) and still be moving on, and if she changes her mind, she changes her mind. If she doesn't, you weren't meant to be together. You can't force love or a successful relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AronSchneider Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 Why I go for sex? Well she told me that she was not sexual attractive to me, that was one of the reasons why she dumped me. So if we have sex she most find me sexual attractive in some way. And that is good! I now that she will stay single. According to friends, her activity on Facebook and in fact that one of the reasons why she dumped me was because she missed her single life and her best friend (still in Asia) told her that they will have so much “single fun” when she returned. This friend in Asia was also sooo happy because another couple that they hang around with had broken up. Still, she is an easy pray right now and I think some dude will get to her heart. And I don’t want that. This plan I’m about to using is the sum of everything people say on this forum, in “get your ex back books” and so on. Yes it very manipulative. But if I get her back, I think I can fix all my faults. In 4 months I will be on my way to another city for a University program. It will be different kind of relationship either way. Yes, I’m very hurt by this. But I will move on. I have already started here and will continue in the new city with new friends and a new life! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AronSchneider Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 It sounds like you're out for revenge. That's not an attractive quality I would ever look for in getting back together or starting with someone new. When you act that way it's easy to see why she did what she did. Revenge never works. Most times you still end up feeling like crap. I think you need to rethink your game plan. I do not act like this way when she is around. But, Im starting to get little tuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pumpkinmoon Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 are we ever gonna find out what the text said? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
browneyedgirl36 Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 Well, if you're set on doing this "plan," I wish you good luck. Just keep in mind that, if you get her drunk on alcohol and she has sex with you, that doesn't necessarily mean she's attracted to you again. People have sex with people they aren't attracted to all the time -- especially when intoxicated. That's the whole issue with being drunk -- peoples' judgement is impaired, and they do things they wouldn't necessarily do when sober. And, more than that, as I said before, having sex with you will NOT necessarily make her suddenly want to be with you again. Sex doesn't necessarily equal feelings; she can have sex with you and still not want to be your girlfriend anymore. As far as the "plans" to get an ex back, I stand by what I said. It's manipulative, and manipulation is not a good way to get someone to be with you -- definitely NOT a way to reconcile and build a long-lasting relationship. But, you need to find that out for yourself. And, as for changing your faults "if" you get her back...why not work on changing them now, for yourself and for possibly future relationships you might have with others? Like I said, I wish you luck. Just be prepared to deal with everything if this doesn't turn out how you've planned. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AronSchneider Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 My goal is to get my ex back and that is it. I can wait 1 month more if I have got to. But I most in some point contact her to get my stuff back so why not use that time to make her confused about the break up. The thing is that I most let her go before I can get her back. This is the big trick in all of this. She knows that I’m pretty okay with the break up, but still misses her. Either way it will be tuff to get her back. But this method is the best thing to do and the most recommended one in every Forum. You can not build a long lasting relationship if you have no relationship to build on. I will not use jealousy and other things like that. I’m just playing it cool. Sure, I can send her an E-mail or text her saying that I want her to send my stuff to me. If you think that is a better idea? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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