No ONe can Help Me....

[SweetypieEnlightenedOne]

[lil_mamarains13]

I feel for you. I think the first thing you need to do is seek counseling because no one is worth killing yourself over. I have been in this dark place you are in more than once. I am not judging you, but it is time to get strong, be strong, and stay strong for you own sake. I am sorry this is happening to you, and I hope things get better for you. We are never alone no matter how much our mind makes us think we are. Good Luck!

 

 

 

If you want to talk further to me you can PM if you want, but no pressure.

[Osiris]

Greetings SweetypieEnlightenedOne,

 

You are not miserable at all Things happens and who can blame you that you are in love with a perhaps wrong person?

 

 

All the best,

 

Osiris.

[buffalosoldier]

Hey Sweetypie,

 

Well firstly,long time no see! Welcome back

 

I know how you feel in the situation you described,maybe not exactly but i know that reading your post i could relate to everything you said,the thoughts and feelings,everything.

 

Can i ask,do you WANT to break up with him? Is it just that you're scared to? or do you think you have fallen out of love with this man? I only ask this because i was in a similar situation, and it took me absolutely ages to realise that although my boyfriend wasnt being the best he could be,that the real reason i was so upset was because i had fallen out of love with him,but didnt want to admit it and go through the whole gruelling process of breaking up.

 

Maybe this is the same for you? I understand that you say you want him to be the man he used to be,but maybe its really YOU that has changed.Its always easier to blame others when in fact we are really just upset with ourselves.Im not saying this is the same for you,coz you did mention that he was cursing you and things.I know its hard to admit when you think things are over,you want to hide from it in every way possible,you will use every possible stalling process until the universe take it outta your hands,know what i mean?

 

Have you thought about maybe just taking a break for a while? Splitting up is pretty final,but sometimes a break away from each other can do the world of good,and make each partner realise what they are missing.

 

Just a thought,hope you feel better soon im so sorry you're going through this,but you'll be fine in the end just be strong.

[ameliamolly]

I can totally relate to your post Sweetypie. I was in a relationship and felt stuck for many reasons.

 

It was only about 6 months into it when I looked at it and said to myself "oh my, what am I doing with this guy?" It was great in the beginning at it quickly declined to awful. One night we had a bad, bad argument (he was very verbally abusive), and I somehow stupidly decided that I'd rather be dead than to be alone...and being with him didn't seem like an option, I didn't feel worthy of trying to find another man at that point. He left in a fit of rage and I swallowed a whole bottle of sleeping pills. I am thankful that he came back that night otherwise I wouldn't be here today.

 

Even after being hospitalized in a suicide ward for 5 days, I came back to him, stupidly again, in the hopes it could be resurrected and made into a healthy relationship. I did a lot of work on myself and he seemed to think he was working hard too. I stayed with him almost 3 years total, until 5 months ago.

 

Shortly after starting to try to get myself healthy, I realized that I needed to get out and away from him. I was slowly dying. I felt stagnant, stuck or however you want to describe it-but it was really bad.

 

You cannot change him or make him the man he used to be. He is who he is and people don't change. They can put on a good front, however the "real" person comes out shortly. Maybe you have grown away from him emotionally? Don't feel bad about this. You deserve to be happy and if happy is away from him, then so be it.

 

I understand that you feel like you'll never find another guy. You also don't want to be alone. The first step in this is to realize you will be OK by yourself. You don't necessarily need a man to be complete. Trust me when I say that life will be so much better when you get out of the relationship with him.

 

I was afraid to leave my x for all the same reasons as you. Sure, there were good times, but the bad was incredibly bad. I was 33 and thinking "I am old, no one will want me, there are no good guys out there". I pictured myself sitting around (alone) every night wallowing in my sorrows. I thought I'd grow into an old woman and never have "true love". I wasn't ready to have to start my life again, but I am so happy I did because I finally met a wonderful guy that treats me very well, and you will too.

 

I hope you can find the strength to get out. You need to have peace of mind and move on with your life. Please, please PM me if you want to talk about this more, I am here for you and completely understand the pain that you have right now.

 

Wishing you strength and brighter days!

[kidwolf908]

If you get AIM on your computer you can talk to me to feel less lonely...i may be only 14, but i can really help people with their problems. Everyone I talk to is made happier by what i say. My AIM screenname is Kidwolf908. We can talk and I bet by the end of the conversation you feel better. And maybe if you feel like it you can help me with advice on girls...if you feel that you want to. I also have another post up that i am trying to get replies for but everyone just views it and leaves. So if you want to talk you can talk to me. Thnx.

Chris

[Abfchgirlx]

To get help you can always turn to your female doctor. You should be able to trust them the most since they look after your body for you. A lot of people don't believe your gynocologist can give you advice and give you the help you need about your depression. I went to my gynocologist twice and received the treatment I needed the first round, but refused the psychologist part. Now, I'm back 2 years later with a lighter dose of depression but still seeking my gynocologist for help. They'll talk to you first, give you the meds you need and if there's nothing they can do for you more (because of their own studies) - they will refer you to someone who will listen to you. Who will help you become strong and who will help you confront your fears. They will tell you that you are a person with choices and you should never feel that you don't have those choices.

 

.... I should listen to myself more often, heh.

[Genesis]

I know that it will be hard, but you have to keep your chin up and move on if this guy is not treating you right. This sounds like an abusive relationship to me. Keep God first, talk to friends and family and work on loving yourself first. SO many men and women lose their self esteem and self when being in a unhealthy relationship, that they put so much effort into, and get nothing in return. You may want to consider therapy for co-dependance, that is what this sounds like. You know he is no good for you but you still stay. You need to break up with him before you do something harmful to yourself, or you need tochange the dynamics of your relationship to make it more healthy. If you want to talk you can always PM me.

 

Start to workout it gets rid of stress, read books on self esteem, start going to church, plan events with friends and family. You WILL feel so much better. Break ups are hard, but " you can do bad all by yourself", never let a man curse at you! If a man curses at a woman that should be a deal breaker! Love God, and love yourself enough to walk away if this is an abusive relationship. Two books that I recommend you read are Self Matters, and Relationship Rescue, both by Dr. Phillip C. McGraw (aka) Dr. Phil. You need to think about why you are having self esteem issues, and work on that first, before you work on your relationship.

 

Much Love, and God Bless!

[Abfchgirlx]

I have to say that I just discovered books on self esteem also (in regards to the post above). If you need any assistant in looking for a book, PM me, IM me or something and let me know. I also have a friend that's been abused in a relationship and she sees her friends in those types of places too. She might be able to help you out also (she's an online friend of mine).

 

Just contact me if you need any help ok?