5 months pregnant and he cheated :(

[jraf]

I have to once again repeat an opinion I voiced in another thread. Excalibur, you are EXTREMELY unnecessary. I have only read 3 replies you have written so far, and when I see 'Excalibur' blood rushes to my brain.

 

I quoted the above just so I wouldn't have to type it myself. Excalibur, take a

hike.

 

 

Laurie Ann,

 

Sounds like you're going through a pretty rough time right now. I would really hope that you would check in with your Dr. as soon as you can. You need some support now and you're obviously not going to get any from your husband. If your doctor can't devote the time you need to describe your circumstance, then get your doctor to refer you to a psychologist or other therapist. You are really beating yourself up now and I sense a great deal of confusion within you.

 

None of us can know the whole situation here, but there seems to be a commonality. You've been married for 18 months and pregnant for 5 of those months. Your husband has cheated on you and, for some reason, you feel it is your fault. Your husband wants to separate and "have his own space" to decide "how he feels about you" and you seem to be okay with that. In fact you seem to be okay with anything that he decides to do as long as he is happy.

 

This isn't right thinking Laurie Ann. I think deep down you probably know that. There are all kinds of reasons that marriages fail, but yours has fallen apart pretty quickly and you seem too accepting of this.

 

Whatever you do, you need to make sure that you are ok, both physically and emotionally. You are pregnant and your baby's well being is directly related to yours. Please contact your Dr. asap.

 

Keep posting.

[arwen]

Moderator note: please refrain from personal attacks. As long as the rules of the forum are respected, everyone is allowed to give his or her opinion on a thread- obtaining advice, support and different perspectives on a personal situation is, after all, the purpose of the forum.

[thejigsup]

While I sympathize with you to a point, I do have to say that I have been in your husband's shoes. I had a bf years ago that did not want sex because of a physical condition and depression. I guess it never occurred to him that he could please me even if he did not desire sex. Needless to say, I considered him selfish and he became very unattractive to me. However, I never cheated on him. I left him after five lonely, frustrating years to save my sanity. I think that is what your husband is really saying, he wants out.

[rocio]

What about after the baby comes and you're into the groove of things and suddenly you find your sex drive again and want it all the time, and he feels so guilty that he doesn't want it anymore. Does that give you an excuse to go out and sleep with other men?

[jraf]

I'll give you fair warning, this might get a little long. I am 23 and my husband and I have been married for a year and a half. I am 5 months pregnant. Ever since we got married, I have not had the same sexual appetite that my husband has.

 

I agree with jigsup: you and your partner could have continued with a sexual relationship, though it might have been a different form of sex.

 

There is one thing most have not responded to. Based on your statement, you and your partner had a sexual relationship prior to marriage. After marriage your inclination for sex decreased and basically ceased, 13 months later when you became pregnant.

 

Why did your inclination for sex drop upon marriage? Seems somewhat odd to me.