barbielovesmac Posted January 23, 2008 Share Posted January 23, 2008 Okay, so I know cheating is cheating but I am curious to know which would make you feel worse. I know it all hurts the same ... im just curious to get your view on this Again, I know cheating is cheating and it hurts either way but the question at hand is ... Would you feel worse if your SO cheated on you with someone you know (someone you know personally or someone you just know of) or a perfect stranger? I think it would hurt me more to know or know of the person. What do you think? I KNOW IT HURTS EITHER WAY OK! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dominic_M Posted January 23, 2008 Share Posted January 23, 2008 She cheated with me on someone that I know. It would have probably hurt either way but she met him because of me. So I couldent imagine that it would be any worse if I dident know the guy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lionel Hutz Posted January 23, 2008 Share Posted January 23, 2008 Someone I know would warrant an @$$ wooping. Someone I didnt know I'd be over it a just get the hell outta there. The thought of my ex cheating makes me sick, sometimes I wonder if she ever did. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lana111 Posted January 23, 2008 Share Posted January 23, 2008 toughie. at first i say soemone i know bc obviously you are going to have mutual friends with the person and they are going to be seen around and mentioned at parties and such BUT the fact that they did it with a stranger makes you feel even more scared bc they could cheat with people you didnt even know existed... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daligal83 Posted January 23, 2008 Share Posted January 23, 2008 I'd say someone I know. Because then it's a double betrayal. You've been betrayed by your SO and someone you thought was a friend. That's tough to take. Plus, to me it's even worse because it shows even more that your SO doesn't care how you feel about anything. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenny_mcs Posted January 23, 2008 Share Posted January 23, 2008 Would you feel worse if your SO cheated on you with someone you know (someone you know personally or someone you just know of) or a perfect stranger? I think it would be worse if I knew the person, because then I would think back to times when we were around that other person , and I didn't know what was going on, and I would probably drive myself crazy wondering if I missed any "signs", etc. Ugh, that would suck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barbielovesmac Posted January 24, 2008 Author Share Posted January 24, 2008 when i was cheated on it was with a person whom i didn't know personally ... but i knew 'of' her. and it hurt soooo bad. i would've rather him cheated on me with a perfect stranger..... of course i would've rather him not cheated at all but hey Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beth116 Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 I agree with the other posters. It's worse if you know the person, not only for the double-betrayal, but you also have the unfortunate instances of picturing them together, whereas, if it were a stranger, it's all abstract and less vivid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lana0120 Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 Personally, I do think it would be worse if it was someone you knew because then it might raise the whole 'going on right under your nose' situation, which would be worse, because in addition to feeling the pain of being cheated on, you'd feel really stupid as well. Also, if the person your SO cheated on you with was someone you liked, you'd feel betrayed twice over. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JadedStar Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 Yes, if it was someone you know, worse. Not that either is good but if you knew the person and would run into them sometimes...yeah bad bad bad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iwantittoend Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 If it was someone I knew. Not only would the relationship with your significant other end, but so would the relationship with the other person you knew. Losing trust from 2 people that are close to you would be horrible. I probably wouldn't be able to trust anyone again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kiwi_Sweet Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 This might seem strange, but I'd rather know who was sleeping with my man, so I could have some words with her. Also, I love my boyfriend a lot and if he did cheat, I would like to know who my competition is. That might seem strange, but I don't think I would let my boyfriend get away with cheating on me more than once, but ONCE is forgivable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jettison Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 Not a tough question. If you know them then it will hurt worse. If I found out my most recent ex was dating a friend of mine then I'd be none too pleased. Ouch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lionel Hutz Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 but ONCE is forgivable. Nevaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lana0120 Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 but ONCE is forgivable. Depends on the circumstances. Everybody makes mistakes I guess, and in some instances it might be possible to forgive a one night stand... dunno how you'd manage to forgive it though. A full blown affair though? No way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dako Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 If it were a friend of mine it would be worse, but we don't get a choice do we? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shes2smart Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 If it's someone you know, it's a double whammy. Not only did your SO betray you, but your friend/acquaintence/family member/co-worker/etc screwed you over, too. If it was someone I knew, I'd have to take a really long, hard, honest look at the kind of people I was allowing into my life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CallingAllAngels Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 I can't say either way....my Husband cheated on me with someone I knew, and also with perfect strangers. Toss up here.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JeckyllNHyde Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 I think it would be worse with people I knew. B/c like someone said, that person I know screwed me over TOO. And also it means all the times I trusted my bf and the girl to be around each other.. I was a big fool to think he wouldn't do anything. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flower99 Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 someone I know (or know of) would be FAR worse in my mind...ugh..ouch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nixee Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 This happened to me both ways... When thinking about the other woman involved....it was, by far, worse when it was with someone I knew. Not I that was super close girlfriends with the woman or anything.... but it is that whole "putting a face to the crime" thing. I didn't understand how she could do that to me having known us as a couple... it just felt so much more malicious, and thereforeeee I felt much more deeply wounded. When it was with someone I didn't know, it was much easier to chalk it all up to simple desire. She didn't know me... she just wanted my man. In either case, when thinking about my man, both cases hurt in their own way for different reasons... it is hard to say which one really hurts worse. I think for me the answer to that depends on whether or not it was a one night thing or a long-standing affair. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tiredofvampires Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 Nixee, I'm sorry that happened to you! Both ways!! But what you're saying makes sense to me. Everyone seems to be taking the position that if you knew this person, it would be worse because you'd be doubly betrayed. Well, what if you knew this person and they were like, a real piece of nutzo work? I think if I was cheated on by some girl who clearly was out to lunch, I'd at least be able to comfort myself that my bf had gone INSANE. So, some mitigation could be granted on the basis of mental instability. Whereas what if the girl he was cheating on me with was some outrageously beautiful, sophisticated, coveted-by-every-man woman but I didn't have the benefit of having the slightest inkling of who she was? To me, what I can't see grows greater. My imagination is worse to me than knowing exactly what I'm dealing with. I'm going to go against the grain of everyone else and vote for: I'd rather know the person. Gotta know your "enemies", right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bunny2007 Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 I was cheated on with someone I knew of but wasn't friends with and with complete strangers and with prostitutes, so I'm just pretty much hurt all round. But for some reason it was worse thinking of the girl I knew of and not the ones I never saw because It made the visual images much more profound and hurtful maybe because I knew what she looked like and she was very attractive even though shes a complete * * * * * . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mavh25 Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 I agree, someone you know definitely. Especially if you know them fairly well I mean, you could of told that person all kinds and there they are laughing at you behind your back Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrmaximum Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 Someone I know would warrant an @$$ wooping. Someone I didnt know I'd be over it a just get the hell outta there. The thought of my ex cheating makes me sick, sometimes I wonder if she ever did. That is very disrespecful on the part of the om if they know you. Probably party to information on the relationship otherwise unobtainable thereforeeee showing themselves as the opportunists they are. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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