Dark Prince Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 Well, I have this problem of mine that I can't seem to get over and this seemed like a logical place to post this. Sorry, if I made a mistake. ( i may have posted something like this before, but like I said, I still can't seem to get over it) I still can't seem to get over the fact that this girl that I work with and like or shall I say had a crush on perhaps for the longest time, turning me down. I had found out from other co-workers she liked me and went a head of myself and asked her out without talking to her first. She turned me down and said I wasn't her type, end of story right? Well, for some reason something has been bothering and chiping at me ever since and I'm confused as too what I should/can do. I keep thinking that I should talk to her about what happened and what I wanted too say then, since we still talk as if none of that ever happened. I still feel like she still likes me, but only said what she said because of some other reason. I want to talk to her about it, but I always run away from the subject before it reaches my mouth. I really wanted it too work out, and wanted it to really stray away from what unfortunately happened. I hope you guys have some advice for me. I'm really going out of mind about this. I hope this was clear for you to understand... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucy_lou Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 telling you you're not her type is pretty much straight to the point and shouldn't leave room for doubt. But only you know. There are a lot of subtle things which can't be conveyed here. But I will say that sometimes we project our attraction onto others and sense a connection when there isn't one. Maybe that's it? I really don't know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redsuede Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 Lucy lou is right on track. She gave you the answer you are looking for. Im sorry for your pain over this.. but this just means the girl that is for you is still out there.. Dont waste anymore energy on this girl... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigSyke Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 im right there with you man. I was going after a girl who works close to me. Just when I thought we were in a serious relationship, i get the worst phone call i could get, and we were dating for only a month. I had no idea what I did to make it go down in flames, but its driving me litterally sick. In fact im in more turmoil now than when the girl i was going to marry bailed after 3 years. How old is this girl? im seeing a pattern in a lot of girls do this. example - liking a guy alot and then suddenly not being interested. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rs.dallaire Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 I can understand why you might entertain some doubts about this but as far as I'm concerned you are game over, especially since the two of you work together. You haven't even gone out with her so you should have no issues getting over it. If she comes back to you at some point and brings it up, fine. But otherwise you should leave it and move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark Prince Posted January 6, 2008 Author Share Posted January 6, 2008 You guys are probably right. Thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boo121 Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 I still can't seem to get over the fact that this girl that I work with and like or shall I say had a crush on perhaps for the longest time, turning me down. I had found out from other co-workers she liked me and went a head of myself and asked her out without talking to her first. She turned me down and said I wasn't her type, end of story right? how did you ask her out? Reading your post i expect you had a bit of one-itis with her. So when you asked her out you were thinking (i better not screw this up). That mindset alone will screw it up for you. It just takes practice to do it right. Ask for email first, it's low risk, and then email her later on about a time/place to meet up. You literally have nothing to loose. She turned you down, now you know! and have you actually lost anything? Ur investment... asking her a simple question! no big deal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark Prince Posted January 7, 2008 Author Share Posted January 7, 2008 how did you ask her out? Reading your post i expect you had a bit of one-itis with her. So when you asked her out you were thinking (i better not screw this up). That mindset alone will screw it up for you. It just takes practice to do it right. Ask for email first, it's low risk, and then email her later on about a time/place to meet up. You literally have nothing to loose. She turned you down, now you know! and have you actually lost anything? Ur investment... asking her a simple question! no big deal Well, what I mostly did was ask her while we were both on break and just asked if she'd like to have dinner sometime. I had thought that dinner was the right thing to do, but afterwards I realized how stupid I was and that I probably shouldn't have gone that far. I knew I wanted to start small first. But, you pretty much summed it up. I didn't want to screw it up because she was the first girl I had a real bad crush on and she was also the first girl that I would ever ask anything of like that. So, wait a minute, are you saying that I should actually talk to her again about that or are you making an example of this for next time with a different girl? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dating Coach Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 Don't feel stupid. If she had any interest in you at all, she would have agreed. The way you asked didn't have some miraculous effect that caused her yes to turn to a no. She said no because that's how she feels period. Good job for asking upfront. Time to move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boo121 Posted January 8, 2008 Share Posted January 8, 2008 So, wait a minute, are you saying that I should actually talk to her again about that or are you making an example of this for next time with a different girl? You put ur self on the line, takes courage and some balls to ask up front. good stuff. I'm saying that the next time you go and ask a women out, u'll feel less nervous and it will be easier. I wouldn't worry about her, she missed out Generally speaking the more confident you get at asking women out, the more yes's you'll hear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark Prince Posted January 8, 2008 Author Share Posted January 8, 2008 Thanks for that guys. I certainly will be thinking about that the next time I do ask someone else out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost69 Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 hey, you did it. most guys can't even muster the courage to ask a girl out or let alone for a phone number. good job. sorry it didn't work out. but this is why you don't crush on someone. you get that out of the way right up front. uninterested? okay, cya. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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