xxYoure My Butterflyxx Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 This is something that's been on my mind a bit over the last couple of days. Its a very unusual question, (don't ask me how I thought of it) and hopefully I won't have to consider this for years to come - but I just keep thinking about it, and can't come to a proper answer. Would you go to your ex's funeral? I mean if he/she died tomorrow, would you? Taking into account everything that has gone on since the breakup? Whether you are friends now or not - they were a big part of our lives at some point. I would like to think I would go and pay my respects, but I get the feeling I wouldn't be very welcome (and he is the dumper) so it would make it a bit awkward... Call me morbid or whatever, but the thought just popped into my head and I can't get it out. Just want to hear other's thoughts on this. xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lana0120 Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 Yeah, that is kind of morbid to be honest.... I think it would all depend wouldn't it. I mean, you'd have to assume you were notified about the death in the first place. You might not even know if you've moved on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jess... Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 That is an unusual question! I would want to go, and pay my respects as you say - but my ex's parents also give off a bit of a hostile vibe (his mother mostly) and I wonder if I would be unwelcome also. But I think I would just go anyway. On the other hand, we haven't talked for a long time, we aren't friends, we probably never will be (as I have no desire to be friends with him) so *maybe* it would be best to not go... but that would be pretty disrespectful. I don't know. I think I would just go - stuff what the family thinks - he was a huge part of my life, we had some wonderful times, and I would want to acknowledge that. I'm interested in other responses too. I highly doubt he would come to mine anyway! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hopefulromantic79 Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 Yes, I would definitely go. Without a doubt. We weren't good together, but that doesn't mean I didn't love him. He was a significant person in my life in so many ways...and I would want to pay my respects to him. For all the bad things that happened between us, we had so many beautiful moments ~ the most beautiful moments I've had in my life so far. p.s. I have a morbid mind, too...don't feel bad! I've thought about this too -- but more along the lines of would HE come to MY funeral if I died... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yellow_sweater Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 Absolutely. I would go to pay my respects to someone with whom I spent seven years and who I loved very much... I'd go to show his family that, regardless of what he did to me, they didn't do anything wrong, and I still love and respect them... and I'd go to prove that healing is possible. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HyruleGuardian Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 I am friends with all my exes, so of course. Say I wasn't a friend with an ex and I had a bad break up... I'd probably still go just to pay my respects for the time we had together. I was still a part of their life and they most likely changed me in some way, so I'd almost feel guilty not going. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xxYoure My Butterflyxx Posted October 24, 2007 Author Share Posted October 24, 2007 I mean, you'd have to assume you were notified about the death in the first place. You might not even know if you've moved on. The funeral announces are on the radio here every morning, and word gets around rather quickly (as its a very small town) so even if I wasn't personally notified (which I wouldn't be - good point) I would probably hear about it. Unless they didn't put it over the radio... Hmm...that's a good point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ersit Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 I would definitely go to my most recent ex's funeral if she passed away. I still talk to her and we have a bunch of mutual friends, so I'm sure I'd find out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xxYoure My Butterflyxx Posted October 24, 2007 Author Share Posted October 24, 2007 p.s. I have a morbid mind, too...don't feel bad! I've thought about this too -- but more along the lines of would HE come to MY funeral if I died... Oh so its not just me - thank goodness! Haha. I've thought about the reverse too - I really don't think he would go to mine. It would surprise me if he did (but how could I know if I'm dead lol) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
just M.E. Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 Sure, but then late at night I would come back and dance on his grave .... actually I'm just joking about doing that, but I would honestly think that. What might stop me would be two very dysfunctional people in his family that I would prefer to never see again. He and I had a good run of intensity but it was not sustainable, that I have learned, the whole narcissistic theme, not a story I care to dwell on anymore as I feel I am over the "hump" of healing and maybe starting the downhill run. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Optigan Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 Why of course; I'd be delighted!!! Now seriously, no, I would not. Her birthdays, her weddings, her funerals - it's her life, her death. Nothing to do with me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sara1 Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 You're not planning anything are you?? Funny and morbid question i haven't thought about. I would go to a past ex's funeral but not this most recent one. definitely not. What is the point? Celebrate his life or mourn for his loss? I have no regard for the ex other than disgust for his awful behavior. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xxYoure My Butterflyxx Posted October 24, 2007 Author Share Posted October 24, 2007 You're not planning anything are you?? I hope you're joking. God no! It was just a thought that popped into my head and wouldn't leave. I would never even think about planning something like that! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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